For those who used DE or were donors

[Anonymous]

Do you know of any clinics that give the child the option of contacting the donor as adults?

I posted in the main forum about wanting to donate. I have looked at SG, Columbia, and Dominion and they are all completely anonymous. I would love to sign up as a donor but I would prefer a clinic that has this option. I have a close friend who has been trying off and on for years to find his biological dad. His case is different, because I personally think his mom just doesn't really know who his father is, but wants to save face. His dad is technically his stepdad and he loves him the way a son loves a father, but he says he just wants closure or a picture at least. I am totally fine never being contacted but would like this option to be available if possible.

And if not, want clinic did you use and were you happy with them? Would you use them again?

[Anonymous]

You may want to work through an agency. I think you have more freedom to set terms that both you and the intended parents are comfortable with if you do that. Thanks for considering being a donor. You will be giving someone the greatest gift in the world.

[Anonymous]

Agree with the above. Look for a donor agency and skip the clinic. We used a local clinic, but an out of state agency who deals with donors and surrogates. We have all the freedoms with our donor that you are talking about. We even met her. It was very comforting and we're so glad we did.

[Anonymous]

I agree about the agency thing. Clinic donors are completely anonymous. Also, thank you for being willing to donate and giving people like me the chance to finally have the baby I have been so desperately trying to have. I feel like appreciation and thanks is not even adequate to express how invaluable your donation will be to someone.

[Anonymous]

I chose a donor through a clinic, but I went out of town. I went to Oregon Reproductive Medicine in Portland, OR. The recipient has the option of meeting the donor or doing a semi-private donation, depending on what the donor is willing to do. We had email contact with our donor, facilitated by the clinic. Our contract stipulated that we would pay for her to sign up with the Donor Sibling Registry, and the donor agreed she would be willing to sign up with them. It's not a guarantee that the child will be able to contact her later, but it's better than nothing. Donors at ORM are also able to choose to be completely anonymous.

I think San Diego Fertility Clinic (?) may allow similar arrangements.

Thank you, OP, for being willing to do this. It means the world to parents like me. If you want to look into donating through one of these out of town clinics, you should contact them. The recipient couple would be the party responsible for your travel expenses. I got the sense that ORM took good care of their donors. Our donor had donated previously, and before I got kicked out of ORM's donor database due to pregnancy success, I saw that "our donor" was back in their system. She must have had a good experience going through the donation that resulted in our child if she was willing to do it again.