Can you avoid the princess phase?

[Anonymous]

Parents of daughters, if you managed to avoid the craze of all things princess, disney, etc... how did you do it? Or, if they became interested then why, how and what did you do to manage it?

[Anonymous]

I have a five and three year old and they both like princess stuff among many other things. I don't really stop them from liking what they like. I think I read somewhere that somewhere in the mind of a preschooler they believe gender to be fluid so the age group tends to gravitate towards the extreme (ie. everything pink, princess, playing mommy) to identify themselves. I'll see if I can find the article.

is it just a personal preference to avoid it?

[Anonymous]

my 4 yr old is really into princesses, but we've just never made them specific - i find the fairytails and the disney stories to be really dark (dead mothers galore), so we allow the stuff that encourages creative play - costumes, wands, tiaras, but she's never seen a single movie or show about princesses and has no specifically disney-related stuff...

All that works except that her school chums know a LOT about disney and so they all talk about the stories and movies and a lot of the gifts given to her at her last bday involved disney princesses. i just exchanged for more neutral things.

we also watch the sonia sotomayor-sesame street video where she says "Princess is not a career" - which I really love

[Anonymous]

There are good and bad things to be taken from the princess phase, so focus on the good if your daughter seems to like that.

For us that meant focusing on
dressing up and pretending to fight dragons
making up stories, drawing pictures of the stories (and eventually writing them)
helping others

And moving the attention away from:
waiting for the prince to rescue you
makeup

[Anonymous]

There is a cute book called, "Not All princesses Wear Pink." I read it to my daughter when she was in a "dress only" phase and it helped her start wearing pants. We've been to disney world and loved it so I am not an anti-disney/princess person fwiw.

[Anonymous]

I haven't limited my daughter's interest in princess stuff-- she fully embraced it and knew the names of the Disney princesses and then -- POOF-- she turned 5 and she dropped it entirely. She says princesses are what four year olds are into. Now she is all about fairies!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I haven't limited my daughter's interest in princess stuff-- she fully embraced it and knew the names of the Disney princesses and then -- POOF-- she turned 5 and she dropped it entirely. She says princesses are what four year olds are into. Now she is all about fairies!

hilarious.

[Anonymous]

My 3-year-old is not into princesses at all! Neither is she into castles, tiaras, dressing up, etc.. And she's also not into dolls, her best friends are her stuffed animals.

I can't figure out whether it is good or bad. Girls are supposed to play princesses and mommies, right??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 3-year-old is not into princesses at all! Neither is she into castles, tiaras, dressing up, etc.. And she's also not into dolls, her best friends are her stuffed animals.

I can't figure out whether it is good or bad. Girls are supposed to play princesses and mommies, right??

My dd wasn't into princesses until she hit 4 - totally influenced by her preschool friends. if your lo is home with you, she may not turn onto princesses until surrounded by other kids.

[Anonymous]

We have avoided it just fine with our 6 and 3 yr old DDs.

We had some princess stuff, mostly costumes, I tried to avoid the pink, but I didn't make a big deal out of it. Just don't automatically buy her pink princessy stuff for everything, toothbrushes, underwear etc.

They have been princesses but no more than they have been doctors, or teachers or magicians.

Don' make it off-limits -- that will just increase the appeal.

[Anonymous]

I don't mind the princess phase too much. I think Disney has been doing a better job of making their princesses more independent and spunky (Rapunzel). I refuse to buy Snow White who must be the most dim-witted of characters. I also balance the princess obsession by buying books like Paperbag Princess and Amelia Earhart picture books. I'm conscious not to 'preach' too much to DD. She's just having fun and learning about her world. The best thing that I can do for her to counteract the whole damsel in distress thing is to be a good role model and have my relationship with DH reflect that as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Parents of daughters, if you managed to avoid the craze of all things princess, disney, etc... how did you do it? Or, if they became interested then why, how and what did you do to manage it?

Why would you do this? Let them use their imagination. Why would you squelch their imagination?

[Anonymous]

We didn't promote it but we also didn't do anything to avoid it. Neither of my girls really were into princesses. For a few months around age 4, they liked princess type dresses but that was it. My older daughter did like books/movies about princesses for a bit but not in an obsessed way.

[Anonymous]

My 4.5yo has never gotten into the princesses. We avoid the books, movies, and any other stuff with princess on it (clothes, nightgowns, etc.). We read the real versions of the fairytales such as Hans Christian Andersen, etc., not the Disney versions. I give lots of other opportunities for fun play, just no Disney. We got a Cinderella blue gown from Grammie as a gift but I took the Cinderella medallions off the breast of the gown and just gave it to her as a regular ol' dress-up play dress, and that's what she thinks it is. She does not associate it with Cinderella. I did the same with the plastic shoes that came with it -- just took off the medallions on the top. She thinks they are dress-up shoes.

She knows who the princesses are from going to school and talking with other girls, but just never really heavily got into it b/c of all of the above.

Also, she was the only girl in her class who was not a princess for Halloween. HA. That tickled me. For Halloween costumes, we just go down to the dress-up box and make up a costume together. So, last year for example, she was a fairy (generic fairy, not Tinker Bell or anthing like that) with pink leggings and tutu skirt, and a pink top, and some butterfly wings we had in the dress-up box. This year she was a bride, with a white dress from the dress-up box, and then we made a hairpiece and a floral "bouquet" from clearance stuff we found at Michael's. Overall result? Creative costume in which she felt beautiful and unique, and not Disney Princess-y.

[Anonymous]

Same as 9:42. I have a 4.5 year old in PreK. She's aware of the basic princess stuff from her friends and has some generic fairy/princess dress up things. She likes to read fairy tales, but has never asked for anything more Disney specific, so we've followed her lead/lack of interest. We're mostly no screen time so far, so I think that may have limited her exposure and interest. We'll start watching movies, including Disney, when she's a bit older. I have fond memories of the classic Disney movies so I look forward to seeing them together.