Just a VENT-NO I am not OK?!?!
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
|
I just needed to vent. All my life my biggest fear is that I would not have a baby. I never really tried because I thought that the time would come. Now in my early 40's after waiting for "him" trying for two years it seems to be a reality. The RE's can't find a reason it is not happening (FSH fine, SC fine). We just can't afford IVF and I really am trying. Now my supervisor who is older than me (by a year) and not married is pregnant. I just want to throw up quit my job. Adoption is not a solution - I did that so I have a child in my life but it is not enough. My soul aches!!! And frankly I may hurt the next, meaning well, person who tell me how they are OK if they never have a baby. Why do I have to be OK with this?
|
Anonymous
|
You don't have to be ok with it. I surely am not ok with it. I am the only one of my friends from high school, college and law school who doesn't have a baby. And it's not by choice. I didn't even start trying when I was old - I was 31 when we really started trying. Well now at 36 and after a couple of tragic losses and no pregnancy in over 3 1/2 years, I can truly say I not only feel your pain, but I live your pain every single day. Adoption is not an option for me. At.All. I've been pregnant and want to be pregnant again. And I agree about people telling you it is ok - I have actually gotten pretty outspoken and I will flat tell someone exactly what I think when I feel them even going there.
Vent all you need to. This is what this board is for. You are not alone. |
Anonymous
| I'm so sorry for you, but I do hope you still love your adopted child and are shielding him or her from your feelings. |
Anonymous
+1. |
Anonymous
|
OP here- Adopted child has and will never know of these feelings as I wanted to adopt anyway and these feelings have nothing to do with them. I guess that is why I did put it here as I feel that I have no other outlet.
Thank you to all of you and to PP who us going through this also. |
Anonymous
12:17 here again - You were so right to post here. And I never got the impression that you love your adopted child any less or that you allowed your adopted child to know your feelings. From one person to another who badly wants to be pregnant, what you are feeling is completely normal. I really, truly hope that you get your heart's desire. Feel free to come and vent here anytime. Adoption is not for everyone (I will truthfully say it is not for me) and there is nothing wrong with having an adopted child like you do and still wanting to experience pregnancy. Nothing wrong with that at all. Hang in there
|
Anonymous
| I still feel very bad for your adopted child. May he or she be loved and wanted, and you have no ill feelings of the child. You adopt just to have a child in your life? This child is now not enough? I'm sorry but I'm outraged. Things happen for a reason OP. Think about that... |
Anonymous
| I feel you OP. I'm 15 years younger than you and many people I know are having babies right now. It sucks not being able to. I really don't think adoption is for us, nor are medical interventions. I hope things work out for the both of us! |
Anonymous
| Burn In he'll PP, oP was just venting! Hang in the op if sucks... |
Anonymous
Not pp, but geez- simmer down. |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
| OP- How old are you? I truly wish you the best of luck- but I must admit I gasped when I read your adoption comment. |
Anonymous
That's what turned me off towards her. I felt bad until the adoption part. |
Anonymous
| Wow, I'm sorry you are having such a tuff time but as a mom through adoption my goal was to be a mom no matter how our children joined our family. Please don't adopt again given your feelings as children through adoption should never be second best. There is nothing that exciting about pregnancy and the joy is all in that wonderful child you are raising. |
Anonymous
| Have you called Dr Dimattina at Dominion? It the NCIVF on your credit card. It's $4400. |