5 yr old wakes up twice a night

[Anonymous]

My five year old never sleeps through the night. He usually always gets up twice on average. His bedtime and day are structured. Every night it's dinner by 6:30, bath around 7:15 and a book around 8:00. Bedtime is 8:30. By around 12-1:00 am, he's up and wanting to get into our bed. Since our bed won't comfortably sleep 3 people, I walk him back to bed. Every time I do this he starts to throw a fit and will sometimes wake up his younger sibling (which really pisses me off). He eventually falls asleep but wakes up and tries again a few hours later. I've read many books and I've tried many different things. I tried making a bed on the floor beside our bed for him (he didn't want to sleep on the floor), I've tried putting up a gate to block access (he climbs right over), I've tried countless times to ignore him when he calls me into his room (this is when he wakes up our toddler and then I have two kids awake), I've tried to go into his room and not speak to him at all but put him back in his own bed without words (this was suggested in a highly rated book by pediatrician)..I've tried so many things. Nothing else is going on at home and the pediatrician said some kids just aren't good sleepers. Lastnight he woke me up three times and threw his final fit at 6 am..waking up his younger sibling for the day. It's so tiring to deal with. I'm ready to send him off to a boarding school (if only we could afford it!) far away.

[Anonymous]

This is what is working for us. DD and I made a big sixty day chart. The end of the chart was a square with a major prize (a baby alive doll). Every so often during the chart, there were other rewards, either small dollar toys, candy or special mom time. The nights that she stayed in her own room she got a check mark. The nights she came out, we didn't mark the box at all, so the punishment was adding more time until she could get the grand prize.

It took several months, but DD got her Baby Alive last week. I actually was able to sleep for nine hours last night!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is what is working for us. DD and I made a big sixty day chart. The end of the chart was a square with a major prize (a baby alive doll). Every so often during the chart, there were other rewards, either small dollar toys, candy or special mom time. The nights that she stayed in her own room she got a check mark. The nights she came out, we didn't mark the box at all, so the punishment was adding more time until she could get the grand prize.

It took several months, but DD got her Baby Alive last week. I actually was able to sleep for nine hours last night!

Just curious, but doesn't it teach your child that their is a reward for everything, such as just listening to parents. THey might start relating everything to What do I get?

[Anonymous]

We were right there with you with our 3 yo DS. I finally took the advice of several friends who were in a similar situation and put one of those safety door-knob things on his door so he can't get out. Worked like a charm. Yes, he stood at his door the first night and banged on it for several minutes, woke up his sister, etc. but the next day we bought a white noise machine for DD's room and he hasn;t woken her up since. Most nights he sleeps through now and on the nights he does wake up, I will go in the first time to make sure he is OK, hasn;t had a bad dream or something else going on and then I tell him he may not come out again and I tell him I am locking the door. He usually doesn;t bother trygin after that.

Flame away people but the people who find it cruel to gate/lock the door are usually those who actually get good sleep and have no idea how awful it is to wake up and be awake dealing with this for several hours every night! Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We were right there with you with our 3 yo DS. I finally took the advice of several friends who were in a similar situation and put one of those safety door-knob things on his door so he can't get out. Worked like a charm. Yes, he stood at his door the first night and banged on it for several minutes, woke up his sister, etc. but the next day we bought a white noise machine for DD's room and he hasn;t woken her up since. Most nights he sleeps through now and on the nights he does wake up, I will go in the first time to make sure he is OK, hasn;t had a bad dream or something else going on and then I tell him he may not come out again and I tell him I am locking the door. He usually doesn;t bother trygin after that.

Flame away people but the people who find it cruel to gate/lock the door are usually those who actually get good sleep and have no idea how awful it is to wake up and be awake dealing with this for several hours every night! Good luck!

I woke up dealing with my horrible sleeper several times a night for close to five years (counting the end of pregnancy) and i guess what you suggest beats jumping out the window but not much else....

To the OP -- I have mentioned this a few others times on DCUM and not gotten any responses, but I cut fluoride out of my horrible sleeper's diet and after two or three days he started sleeping through the night. He was four and a half --- !!!!! -- and had been waking up multiple times per night his whole life. Once I knew he could do it I added getting a toy he really wanted if he slept through the night every night for a week, and marked the calendar. We had to start the week all over if he woke me up or got out of bed. (i said he could wake up but not call out for me or get up.) Then we marked the calendar for two weeks at a time to get a toy. Then the issue disappeared. I also did something i read in a sleep book -- i put him to bed later than usual so he woudl actually be tired, and i checked on him every five minutes -- without him having to call for me -- until he fell asleep, so he would have no excuse to get up during the going to sleep phase. I also mentioned to him during the day that I had checked on him while he was asleep and said things like, you were sweaty, or, you had kicked off your blanket, or something. I think he was reassured by that. I think all of those things together worked but i swear by the fluoride, and it only takes two or three days to check it out. Good luck. You must be insanely tired.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is what is working for us. DD and I made a big sixty day chart. The end of the chart was a square with a major prize (a baby alive doll). Every so often during the chart, there were other rewards, either small dollar toys, candy or special mom time. The nights that she stayed in her own room she got a check mark. The nights she came out, we didn't mark the box at all, so the punishment was adding more time until she could get the grand prize.

It took several months, but DD got her Baby Alive last week. I actually was able to sleep for nine hours last night!

Just curious, but doesn't it teach your child that their is a reward for everything, such as just listening to parents. THey might start relating everything to What do I get?

Oh Please! When the main prize takes months, and special time with mom is one of the other prizes, it isn't spoiling or teaching them that they will always get things. Especially since other things are not given rewards.