Dreading Our Move to New Home

[Anonymous]

We are building a new house, and the neighbors have been absolutely ridiculous. We are doing everything according to the local requirements, and we are not building a house that is out of line with the neighborhood. For whatever reason, though, we have ridiculous neighbors.

They have been writing ugly things on our building permits which are posted outside and calling and e-mailing us about perceived concerns about the project while they knew we were on vacation. And this is after the local jurisdiction told them that the things they were complaining about were not covered by the local ordinances and to get a life.

We have never been made to feel more unwelcome, and if we knew then what we know now, we would have never bought the place. Yet, now we are stuck. I dread leaving our current neighbors and moving into a place where people apparently have no sense of boundaries. Our current neighbors would do anything for us, and we would do anything for them (and we have and they have). I can't believe we are trading them for this nonsense.

Has anyone else ever had to make such a move? Did it turn out ok after all?

[Anonymous]

OP -- is it everyone, most of the neighbor, or just a few select PIA'S?

[Anonymous]

Don't know about the writing on the signs, but the calls and e-mails are from two different people.

[Anonymous]

Where do you live

[Anonymous]

I would not care about this, but I am used to living in the city and having little to no contact with neighbors. Now I live in the suburbs, but in a condo - so, while we are friendly, I barely know my neighbors names.

If you are comfortable with this possibility, is selling the house something worth considering?

[Anonymous]

I can't believe people are so hostile and are writing on the permits. What jerks! I would move in and go about your business. There are probably lots of other nice, normal people around. Our neighbors built a massive house on a tiny lot and when new buyers started construction on the house behind them, the neighbors who had already built complained constantly to the county. Some people are just miserable. Try not to let them get you down and enjoy your new house!

[Anonymous]

People who live there already think they own the whole neighborhood. If they don't like what you're doing let them buy the house from you for a fair price. As long as you're doing everything by the book, you don't have to bend and they don't have to like it -- they can just deal and so can you.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like real a-holes.
If it continues feel free to tell them that you will keep your property well-maintained, and they should theirs, and that you intend to live there for a very long time.
Set that expectation up right away: you will not be bullied and you are not going anywhere!

Fwiw, a lot of suburbs can feel like ghost towns on the weekend or after school time, so don't worry about it. You'll make like-minded friends there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can't believe people are so hostile and are writing on the permits. What jerks! I would move in and go about your business. There are probably lots of other nice, normal people around. Our neighbors built a massive house on a tiny lot and when new buyers started construction on the house behind them, the neighbors who had already built complained constantly to the county. Some people are just miserable. Try not to let them get you down and enjoy your new house!

To write on your permits, they had to trespass, which is a crime. Arguably writing on the permits is vandalism, which is another crime.

[Anonymous]

OP, what are some of the things these people are objecting to?

[Anonymous]

Where is this? OP, how long has your construction been going on? Are you building a house bigger than most in the neighborhood? Is there a race or religion angle here that's making them hostile? Are they cranky senile oldsters? More details!

[Anonymous]

This is bizarre-they are writing on your permits and two different sets of neighbors are complaining? We need more info!

[Anonymous]

Ignore them. Sound like miserable people. We have neighbors who constantly file complaints with the County over non-issues (trash left out on trash day, a new fence that had an approved permit, etc.). Some people just feel the need to complain. Congrats on your new house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can't believe people are so hostile and are writing on the permits. What jerks! I would move in and go about your business. There are probably lots of other nice, normal people around. Our neighbors built a massive house on a tiny lot and when new buyers started construction on the house behind them, the neighbors who had already built complained constantly to the county. Some people are just miserable. Try not to let them get you down and enjoy your new house!

To write on your permits, they had to trespass, which is a crime. Arguably writing on the permits is vandalism, which is another crime.

That may be true, but reporting them for a crime is not going to help her fit into the neighborhood.

I wouldn't sweat it, OP. They are probably uptight about a new house in their neighborhood. It's hard. There is one in our neighborhood that I hate. It's too big for the lot and I hate the style, but too bad for me. They have every right to build it. I suspect they will get used to it before you even move in. My advice is to take the high road and be friendly. I think they will realize you're nice and shut up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
They have been writing ugly things on our building permits which are posted outside and calling and e-mailing us about perceived concerns about the project while they knew we were on vacation. And this is after the local jurisdiction told them that the things they were complaining about were not covered by the local ordinances and to get a life.

Can you give a general idea about this, without "outing" yourself?

I'll say, I live in a N Arl neighborhood which has a lot of teardowns. There are a very small number of P.I.A. long time residents who resent the new construction. Most people don't feel this way however. Many are glad to see a rebuild or renovation project improving the neighborhood. I hope you meet the nicer people soon- if it is Arlington, the vast majority of people are wonderful I've found.

One hypothesis, I'm wondering if the objection here is something like this: Do you have a large lot, so can build "by right," i.e. without needing to get variances. So you can build anything as long as its consistent with the zoning and doesn't require neighbor input on the variance. But, there is something unusual about the home- either the architectural style? Or something like a gigantic bungalow that is out of scale with the existing Cape Cods, ramblers?