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I felt the same way as the author and so did DH. My in-laws went bat shit crazy over the idea of elopement even though they cannot attend an event with eachother without a fight erupting and often a subsequent estrangement. The ironic thing is they all had big weddings or as they say they "did things the right way" and not one of their 1st (or even in some cases 2nd) marriages lasted. I got blamed for rebelling against the whole wedding idea yet it was a mutual decision. 10 years and two kids later we are still going strong. I wouldn't be surprised if every year in honor of our anniversary, MIL wears all black, drinks even more alcohol than usual and gets out her vodoo dolls.
By the way, we did throw a small party once we returned from our honeymoon and we said your presence is gift enough. Fights broke out among them before and during the event. Several of them stopped talking to eachother after for many months. I enjoy other people's weddings and I am all for having a wedding if you really want it, but it was never our dream. We wanted a peaceful and serene wedding day and we didn't want to be financially stressed to have that. http://www.slate.com/articles/double_x/doublex/2012/09/big_weddings_are_overrated_and_expensive_you_should_elope_.html |
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I eloped last year in a european country and it was the BEST thing we ever did. I hate being the center of attention, hate dealing with unwanted/hurtful opinions from my family and really hated the idea of dropping 20k on even just a small family wedding in DC (and yeah thats what it would cost for food and drinks and location).
For less money we had a stunning location, three weeks of honeymoon travel, phenomenal pictures and a day that reflecting us 100% from beginning to end. No Drama! We didn't even throw a party when we got back. Marriage was for us and it truly felt more meaningful to say vows to just each other and be on display for a crowd. I can't recommend it enough! and like the PP, I truly love going to other peoples weddings, I love to dress up, buy gifts and dance at receptions and eat cake. I just don't want to be the star of the show. |
| I really like the way she described having the wedding and then a reception party- so that the wedding is over with and the party is really about celebrating, and hopefully less stressful. |
| I'm the same OP. It was the right move for us on every level. mIL hasn't spoken to us since but that's her loss! |
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I eloped 15 years and 2 kids ago. Our parents were happy for us and happy to save the money.
We had a party to celebrate. Many people judged and said we would regret it but we don't. For me it was a sign of maturity and a gift to my parents who clearly would have paid for it but in no way could have afforded it. I am not only happy that I eloped I am proud of myself for not caving to peer presure. |
Sing it to me sistah! We got judged by just about everyone except 1 aunt in law who said she wished her daughter would have done this. Could I also say-I don't look good in white or cream and I sure as hell don't want to pay $500, $1000, $2000 dollars for a dress I will wear once that doesn't look good on me. That was not the motivation, but it was just another bonus of avoiding the hoopla. |
| Another eloper here. Eight years ago. Best thing I did ever...besides marrying my DH. |