Why are pre-teen girls so mean sometimes?
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Anonymous
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My sweet, kind, smart, beautiful, funny, loyal DD came home dejected from school today because her two BFFs were not really including her,and she felt lonely and left out. My daughter was new at her school last year and was so thrilled to have these girls as friends. The girls' moms don't get along so I know they have not seen or talked to each other all summer, which may be why they were leaving DD out.
Just a vent- now she's home, having a snack, is happy and says she'll see how it goes tomorrow. I'm so proud of her, and will not get involved, but.... when I think of how she stuck by one of these girls who was being excluded/bullied last year, and how we have happily driven other girl to and from school, hosted playdates, etc, to help out her single mom, it makes me so pissed off at the callousness of kids! I still remember the awful feeling of being left out and it sucks to see my child going through this. But part of life, I l know. That is all, just wanted to get that out! |
Anonymous
| I know what you mean. There are 2 absolutely AWFUL girls in my daughter's grade. |
Anonymous
| Totally. There are a couple of sixth grade girls in my daughter's class that I just want to smack. |
Anonymous
| Ugh middle school. I can remember in 7th grade there was the cool side of the lunch room and the not cool side. A couple of the cool girls befriended me and I ditched my old friends and pretended i didnt know them becauase they sat on the uncool side. Thankfully my friends took me back when the cool girls decided i was no longer cool. Still friends with them 14 years later. |
Anonymous
Urgh...unfortunately it is the universal truth of pre-teens (and probably teens too). Mine came home and explained that even though things are ok now, she knows there will be trouble b/c there are 3 of her group-of-girls in the same class. Interesting that she knows its just a matter of time until she'll be the one on the outs . Sad.
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Anonymous
| So hard- in these instances I SO want to talk to the moms about what's going on but that just makes it worse. I was chatting with another mom last night who asked how my DD liked the first day of school and I was tempted to say - she had an awful day because your daughter decided to blow her off- but of course I didn't.... |
Anonymous
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I try to remember that learning to cope with rejection and being OK about it in the long-run is an important life-skill (find other friends, other jobs, another spouse, etc, with your self-esteem intact). Just make home that safe place where they will always be loved.
But argh, isn't it awful to witness?!? |
Anonymous
| Sorry OP, we have been there. She'll make it through with her head held high and a smile on her face because she comes home to YOU. You are a good, caring mom. Your DD is very fortunate. |
Anonymous
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Why are pre-teen girls so mean sometimes?
Because they're raised by dcum-posting moms |
Anonymous
| This is 17:53 posting again. You know what is really strange? Although there are 2 girls who are awful in my daughter's grade, her biggest complaints are not about them. The most egregious offenders in our little corner of the universe are a gaggle of mean pre-teen boys. The girls just ignore while the boys actively instigate. |
Anonymous
^ I don't know if this is true, but having met some of the moms of the "mean girls" I definitely see how they got that way. |
Anonymous
This is mean and cruel. Shame on you. |
Anonymous
| I have all sons, but I am so scared about the preteen and teen years because of the social bull sh_t. One of my son's friends loves to tease and exclude. I'm so glad they are in different classes this year (they are only in 3rd). |
Anonymous
You're serious? Read a few threads around here and see if you don't come away with a "raised by wolves" conclusion. The anonymous nastiness on the board can't but be passed along to offspring. |
Anonymous
| I'm going to say it must be hormones and an under-developed cerebral cortex. Did I win? |