Are small schools a blessing or a curse?

[Anonymous]

I went to a small school (maybe 70 kids) and really liked it. I had close acquaintances and people to hang out with (I wouldn’t call them close friends, which I haven’t had since about 3rd grade), which I lost when we moved several hours away and I enrolled at a giant public high school. Did the small school experience make me socially stunted? I don’t think so. I had friends in my medium sized elementary, “friends” in small middle and high schools, and just could not deal with the giant high school and had nobody. I think my 2 years at the giant high school did stunt me, and I had very very few people I talked to in college.

[Anonymous]

Curse. If the class mix is off social skills will not be developed. Schools like Sheridan are too small

[Anonymous]

My kid benefitted educationally from a small private school in middle school, but was desperate to escape for high school. At the middle school, she had a tiny group of friends she didn't really like. Her freshman class has 200 kids and she has a great group of friends. Bigger school = more options. It's a selective high school with small classes, so those benefits are still in place. She is much, much happier now.

[Anonymous]

My sons went to a one class per grade K-8.
They are in college.

It surprises me to see how other families don't have the "got your back" mentality that comes with a small community.

I made a joke about a field trip where my kid forgot his lunch and a dad bought him lunch with his money. He said "Your mom would do the same for mine, so you don't have to pay me back," and this came up when we were organizing a dorm room move out. The parents did not help each other out and where very "stay in my lane", like "I cleaned my 8X10 space. The rest is your problem,".

The contrast to the way our small school sees it that every child matters and we help each other (even if the kids are not best friends) is palpable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DD is much happier following transition from a tiny all girls environment with <20 kids per grade level to a medium sized co-Ed environment with the ability to mix with more kids and more social opportunities. The small can be lovely with a close-knit, cohesive, kind cohort but are much more subject to the power of a bully or queen bee. In a larger environment, the influences of queen bee personalities were diluted and my child was able to find friend groups more easily.

This seems to be the benefit of a co-ed school rather than an all girls' school.

[Anonymous]

My kid is at a very small school, one 16-person class per grade. It has been amazing for her, absolutely the right choice. But there are kids it wouldn’t suit, and there are definitely both trade-offs and risks. Her class gets along well; she has a few close friends, and friendly-but not-close relationships with the rest. But I’ve talked to parents whose kids left the school because they didn’t find their people. These were not particularly socially awkward kids, and they all seem to be thriving in larger environments. With sixteen kids, it’s just a gamble whether they end up clicking, both individually and as a group.

That said, the strong school community and ability for the whole staff to get to know every student are real benefits.

[Anonymous]

In the context of private schools, is a graduating class of 100 to 150 actually “small”?

[Anonymous]

Depends, they can have pros and cons. Pros are your child can get individualized attention. But look into why it is small. Has the school lost many students recently? If so it might be in danger of shutting down.

[Anonymous]

Curse

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think tiny schools are risky and would not consider them for my child.

[Anonymous]

DD is at a small K-8 and it has been challenging socially. The academic benefits have been minimal and don’t outweigh the social constraints for her. She is looking forward to going to a bigger high school.

[Anonymous]

I would not like this for my kids. They seem to pick certain types of kids as friends, and in a smaller school it’s not guaranteed there would be any (or many) of those kids.

[Anonymous]

My kid is unhappy with the change in social dynamics from ~16 kids in elementary to ~40 kids in middle school. She says that people isolate each other, groups break off, and she feels that as someone who is, as far as I and she can tell, reasonably well-liked both in and outside her group. But it's also middle school, and everyone's middle school hormones are on fire.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DD is at a small K-8 and it has been challenging socially. The academic benefits have been minimal and don’t outweigh the social constraints for her. She is looking forward to going to a bigger high school.

We had this experience at Christ Episcopal School (CES) in Rockville. Classes are super tiny - like 6,7,8 kids in the lower school. Either you fit in and make a couple of friends or you don't and can feel very lonely. The middle school seems better although we did not stay there that long. I do know from a friend that this year's graduating 8th grade class only has 4 students, which to me is crazy! I know during the two years we were there, there was lots of student turn over - families would stay for a year or so and then once the social dynamics became apparent, they would typically leave the next year or so, which then influenced whether other families would stay. It was quite the revolving door of students every year!

I think at any school, the ideal class size should have at least 12-15 kids, to give students options socially. Otherwise a very tiny school can make for a lonely and socially isolating experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD is at a small K-8 and it has been challenging socially. The academic benefits have been minimal and don’t outweigh the social constraints for her. She is looking forward to going to a bigger high school.

We had this experience at Christ Episcopal School (CES) in Rockville. Classes are super tiny - like 6,7,8 kids in the lower school. Either you fit in and make a couple of friends or you don't and can feel very lonely. The middle school seems better although we did not stay there that long. I do know from a friend that this year's graduating 8th grade class only has 4 students, which to me is crazy! I know during the two years we were there, there was lots of student turn over - families would stay for a year or so and then once the social dynamics became apparent, they would typically leave the next year or so, which then influenced whether other families would stay. It was quite the revolving door of students every year!

I think at any school, the ideal class size should have at least 12-15 kids, to give students options socially. Otherwise a very tiny school can make for a lonely and socially isolating experience.

My kid is a tiny school. But they are not lonely at all. They make friends from above and below the grade and knows every teacher/staff in the school. The school as a whole do lots of activities together. It didn't feel small at all. But i think for MS we will switch to a bigger school. I think for elementary years, it is wonderful.