Pregnant and overwhelmed with the concept of daycares, help!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP, and yes, every 3 months your child will get a new teacher, and will have to go through stress and transition every time they change. They will nap on the cold floor on a cot from age 12 months. Sorry, not for my baby.

This was not my experience in daycare at all. The teachers often stayed with a group when they transitioned to a new class (which is like every 18 months not 3), and they didn’t sleep on floors... smh

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do which ever you think best. Different people have different preferences, and that is fine, We live in a different metro, so this post makes only general comments.

We quite deliberately avoided in-home daycares and nannys and nanny-shares because it is nearly impossible to really understand what the environment is like when no parent is around.

We have heard both happy and unhappy anecdotes around safety at nannys/in-home daycares. These are not subject to local government inspection. So we could not find a way to verify how safe a place might be. No doubt, some were great, but we could not find a dependable way to sort the great from the others.

We have not heard any *safety* complaints about daycare centers subject to local government inspection. We ended up at a smaller daycare/ preschool (in its own building, not someone’s home) in part because the local government makes both scheduled inspections and unannounced inspections. Those inspection records are generally available online. We avoided using the one place with an actual safety violation in their recent (last 3 years) records, but we were not bothered by minor paperwork issues.

Again, do whichever you think makes sense for your situation. Maybe you have a way to confidently know that a particular nanny or nanny share or in-home daycares is safe,..

In-home daycares in DC proper are licensed and subject to inspection. Not sure about MD or VA.

Not in some localities, especially if below a certain size.

In Maryland you need to be licensed regardless of the size of your daycare. That means nanny shares are illegal as it is an illegal daycare. If a nanny share is reported you will be shut down and fined. (That is if you’re reported.)

I’m not familiar with Virginia’s licensing requirements.

NP. I’m in VA, a few years ago when I was looking at daycares for my child, I did some research on this. If they have 4 kids or under they do not need to be licensed. So a nanny share is technically an illegal daycare but a huge difference is that you employ the nanny and can set your rules as far as hours and the use of cameras. I knew an acquaintance who set up cameras in almost every part of their house. That’s something you cannot do with a home daycare or daycare center - dictate that they allow cameras or dictate their hours.

[Anonymous]

Daycare is damaging for infants. Babies are neurobiologicaly sensitive and need to develop a secure attachment with a stable caregiver. The ratio and turnover of caregivers in institutional daycare is very problematic.

Pay for a nanny, nanny share, or do it yourself.

Group care is for older toddlers.

[Anonymous]

“…Finally, the evidence suggests that children are worse off by measures ranging from aggression to motor and social skills to illness. We also uncover evidence that the new child care program led to more hostile, less consistent parenting, worse parental health, and lower‐quality parental relationships.”

https://www.jstor.org/stable/10.1086/591908

[Anonymous]

Where do they nap if not on cots spread on the floor? Are there cribs for over 1 yr olds at your center? also, yes, bright horizons in DC are about 3k a month for infants

[Anonymous]

Is it very hard to find a nanny without an agency? is fB a good source of nannies?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is it very hard to find a nanny without an agency? is fB a good source of nannies?

No, on the contrary, I would recommend not using an agency and using a community listserv instead. The OP is in an area with fabulous community listservs; people post recommendations for their nannies weekly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:nanny share or nanny. Easy-peasy. Post on you local FB mom group. I am a nanny doing my 2nd nanny share and we are all oh so happy with the arrangement. considering prices for infant care in DC centers (think 3k a month), nanny share is only slightly more expensive but your baby at least will take great naps, have uninterrupted bottles and virtually no illness. In daycare, prepare yourself for 2 weeks in and 2 weeks out sick, repeat.

This is not accurate, I have not encountered a daycare in DC that is $3k/month. My daycare, which is definitely on the most expensive end, was $2600/month. Nanny shares are much more expensive than daycares plus in my opinion more logistically complicated because when nanny needs a day off you don’t have backup. Obviously there are pros but there are also pros to daycare.

OP, just start touring daycares. You’ll learn quickly what you care about. Proximity to you is extremely important. If you can walk there it makes a massive difference.

Not sure which daycares you’re referring to but something like Bright Horizons was about $3300/month for infant care as of 2023. It’s probably higher now.

[Anonymous]

The logistics of nanny share are fine. Do what’s best for your baby.