Emotional relationship / affair - Where is the line

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The being drunk or high and leaning on you/hand holding was her testing the waters. Because if you had pulled away and not allowed that, she could have easily become “embarrassed” and blamed it in her intoxicated state.
You passed her test—-but failed your wife.

Do better.

I doubt he’s told his wife everything that he typed on his OP.

People like this get high off of lying and getting away with it.

[Anonymous]

It’s hard, I have something similar but not as bad as you. I definitely feel like it’s more than just a regular friendship because of the tension between us. We usually ride together to work events, respond to each others messages on weekends, I notice he will touch my fingers is grabbing something or lightly brush against me, put his hands around my waist once, stuff like that.

It’s fun but neither one of us will take pass this tension phase because that’s the best part and we don’t want to blow up our families.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s hard, I have something similar but not as bad as you. I definitely feel like it’s more than just a regular friendship because of the tension between us. We usually ride together to work events, respond to each others messages on weekends, I notice he will touch my fingers is grabbing something or lightly brush against me, put his hands around my waist once, stuff like that.

It’s fun but neither one of us will take pass this tension phase because that’s the best part and we don’t want to blow up our families.

Gross. You need to respect your marriage more. "Thats the best part"??? While talking about a romantic spark with another person?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s hard, I have something similar but not as bad as you. I definitely feel like it’s more than just a regular friendship because of the tension between us. We usually ride together to work events, respond to each others messages on weekends, I notice he will touch my fingers is grabbing something or lightly brush against me, put his hands around my waist once, stuff like that.

It’s fun but neither one of us will take pass this tension phase because that’s the best part and we don’t want to blow up our families.

Gross. You need to respect your marriage more. "Thats the best part"??? While talking about a romantic spark with another person?

Clearly we are both lacking something in our marriage at the moment that is fulfilled by our friendship.

[Anonymous]

Marriage is hard and sometimes boring. Rise above temptation. Unless you want a divorce. But do it with integrity. Don't bring others into your mess.

Cheating is not the way. It really hurts so many people for fleeting enjoyment and spark.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s hard, I have something similar but not as bad as you. I definitely feel like it’s more than just a regular friendship because of the tension between us. We usually ride together to work events, respond to each others messages on weekends, I notice he will touch my fingers is grabbing something or lightly brush against me, put his hands around my waist once, stuff like that.

It’s fun but neither one of us will take pass this tension phase because that’s the best part and we don’t want to blow up our families.

Agree. Been there. Whenever I thought through what would happen if we actually slept together I broke out in a cold sweat -- no good endings there. But then tension and ambiguous part is good.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s hard, I have something similar but not as bad as you. I definitely feel like it’s more than just a regular friendship because of the tension between us. We usually ride together to work events, respond to each others messages on weekends, I notice he will touch my fingers is grabbing something or lightly brush against me, put his hands around my waist once, stuff like that.

It’s fun but neither one of us will take pass this tension phase because that’s the best part and we don’t want to blow up our families.

Agree. Been there. Whenever I thought through what would happen if we actually slept together I broke out in a cold sweat -- no good endings there. But then tension and ambiguous part is good.

You freaked yourself out over tension?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s hard, I have something similar but not as bad as you. I definitely feel like it’s more than just a regular friendship because of the tension between us. We usually ride together to work events, respond to each others messages on weekends, I notice he will touch my fingers is grabbing something or lightly brush against me, put his hands around my waist once, stuff like that.

It’s fun but neither one of us will take pass this tension phase because that’s the best part and we don’t want to blow up our families.

Agree. Been there. Whenever I thought through what would happen if we actually slept together I broke out in a cold sweat -- no good endings there. But then tension and ambiguous part is good.

You freaked yourself out over tension?

Seems like the thought of actually going through with an affair freaked them out

[Anonymous]

If you aren’t attracted, it’s fine. Is there an attraction? If so, back off and create more boundaries.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you aren’t attracted, it’s fine. Is there an attraction? If so, back off and create more boundaries.

This is a dumb question, you would not be so available to someone you are not attracted to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s hard, I have something similar but not as bad as you. I definitely feel like it’s more than just a regular friendship because of the tension between us. We usually ride together to work events, respond to each others messages on weekends, I notice he will touch my fingers is grabbing something or lightly brush against me, put his hands around my waist once, stuff like that.

It’s fun but neither one of us will take pass this tension phase because that’s the best part and we don’t want to blow up our families.

The fun can be quite risky and needs to be managed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s hard, I have something similar but not as bad as you. I definitely feel like it’s more than just a regular friendship because of the tension between us. We usually ride together to work events, respond to each others messages on weekends, I notice he will touch my fingers is grabbing something or lightly brush against me, put his hands around my waist once, stuff like that.

It’s fun but neither one of us will take pass this tension phase because that’s the best part and we don’t want to blow up our families.

The fun can be quite risky and needs to be managed.

We have managed the fun for almost a year. It’s not constant, one of us will pull back for a few weeks here and there and start up again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s hard, I have something similar but not as bad as you. I definitely feel like it’s more than just a regular friendship because of the tension between us. We usually ride together to work events, respond to each others messages on weekends, I notice he will touch my fingers is grabbing something or lightly brush against me, put his hands around my waist once, stuff like that.

We have managed the fun for almost a year. It’s not constant, one of us will pull back for a few weeks here and there and start up again.

I am surprised u can keep it non physical.

[Anonymous]

Don’t get drinks or dinner with her again. Stop texting after 6pm work day. No hugs, no holding hands, avoid touching at all costs. Keep conversations to work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don’t get drinks or dinner with her again. Stop texting after 6pm work day. No hugs, no holding hands, avoid touching at all costs. Keep conversations to work.

Agree you need to cutoff contact. Grey rock.