| My kid with inattentive ADHD is being recruited by D1 schools now and will play in college. |
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College is a really high barrier and that seems like a goal that you shouldn't be wondering if you can reach.
My kid with ADD excels at hockey; he has played house and travel and he is good - he isn't excellent and he has no options for college, but he is enjoying it at the high school level. He simply isn't good enough for college, but his older brother also plays hockey (not ADD and is in college now) and he now plays in an adult league so I feel like his hockey was great - he has a sport for his adult time in his life. I think ADHD is hard for some team sports and some kids do well and others don't. But I kind of don't like your idea that you would take away supports (practice training, etc) because then the kid will be frustrated and fall behind and that seems terrible. I would continue if you can afford time and money and if you kid wants to. You can also try other sports as your kid gets older and changes their mind a bit. |
What was the path like? Was your kid consistently a top player throughout? Did your kid have a hard time with focus in games or have a hard time with spatial awareness, and did it get better in time? Did your kid do any sport specific mental skills type training? |
Say you've got a hockey player who works almost twice as hard as teammates to keep a spot on an elite/AAA hockey team, and the family is sacrificing a lot of time and money to make it happen because the family is committed to support the kid's dreams to play elite hockey for as long as possible, but the kid's weaknesses related to inattentive ADHD are starting to become more of an issue despite the kid's overall athleticism, technical abilities and work ethic. Anyone with exposure to the expense and time commitment required to play AAA hockey likely understand that families will question it along the way, especially if they are wondering if a learning disability is a barrier to the kid achieving the kid's dreams. Kid could still play AA hockey for a few more years and make the high school team and have a lot of fun doing it. Still, good point about taking away supports, which might feel punitive to the kid. The family should continue the current level of support and just watch how this plays out going forward. |
DC was not always a top performer and was a benchwarmer at 13, albeit for a competitive travel team. In fact, DC spent most of the elementary years on the lower-level teams (which was great — that provided a safe and nurturing place to develop). However, DC was obsessed with the sport and dedicated time every day to the sport (self-motivated, not us pushing) and was a starter on a very competitive team by 16. DC was yelled at by coaches for focus probably a bazillion times, but has excellent natural spatial awareness now and has an instinctive sense for where the gameplay is going. The spatial awareness was essentially self-trained due to daily practice; DCs spatial awareness as a child was pretty much non-existent. No sports specific mental skills training. But due to DCs obsession, some form of practice every day, often for hours. My takeaway is that kids with ADHD, inattentive type can excel at sports, but getting to the college level requires a personal level of passion that other kids without ADHD might not need. My kid is obsessed, and that drove everything. |
| PP here. I meant to add that I’m personally skeptical of the value of top-level travel teams for kids under age 11 or so. Player development is so much more important than attending tournament after tournament. Also, the coaches on the lower-level teams were often more motivated because they were trying to build their careers, so they’d spend more time with the kids. I didn’t see how old your kid was, but if your instinct is saying that the top-level team isn’t a good development experience for a kid in elementary, you might be on to something there. |
| I’m the PP with the inattentive kid who is going to play in college and he did say one thing he is struggling with now is how much to disclose to coaches. There is a lot of stigma. |
Hmm. So my child has ADHD, and I don't know the answer to what you are asking, since he is only 13. However, I have never noticed him looking bored or disinterested during his travel soccer games. His body language looks bored and disinterested at other times, sure. |
Could just be a maturity lag/lack of resilience. He'll potentially grow out of it. |
Inattentive type though? |
Yes. However, as I am sure you are aware, even those with inattentive ADHD can hyperfocus on things they are interested in. |
| I’m the PP with the kid who will play college and at 13 DC definitely looked bored/distracted at times in games at that age, even though he was obsessed and practicing for hours in his own. I am pretty sure it was the ADHD because he wasn’t bored at all. Idk. He grew out of it. |
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Mine isn't a success story but one of acceptance that happened organically and without the pain I anticipated.
Pretty much the same situation as your son: highly motivated, tons of extra effort and hyper focus, benefitted hugely from private training (as you mentioned, didn't learn well in the group), always most skilled player on the field and yet not as effective in games as he could/should have been. And it definitely got worse when soccer aged moved from 7 v 7 to 9 v 9 and then to 11 v 11. I honestly think there got to be too many variables, too many decisions, too much space, and he just couldn't process it fast enough. Or sometimes I thought that wasn't true... like his decision making and field vision were actually superior so maybe there was some disconnect between the brain and the body's execution? His body affect absolutely projected lack of interest and effort, which was not true in any way. Anyway, to summarize, around age 14 or so I think he recognized that, while very good overall, he wasn't among the elite of the elite. He sort of gradually stopped asking for private training or small group training. Like when a group would wrap up for the summer and a friend would move on, he wouldn't hustle to find a new group. Eventually he decided to switch a lower level travel team, just a totally different experience for family investment and still plenty of fun for him and everyone. Around the same time he was losing the intense interest in soccer, he developed a new passion. Anyway, it all worked out. It was a huge relief to me because I had thought he *needed* the high level soccer, that it was part of his identity, but he both kept the love and moved on. |
| OP, if he really loves the sport, it wouldn't be an issue. I played D1 soccer with undiagnosed ADHD inattentive. All that exercise was like medication and I loved loved loved the sport. If you tried to get me to play baseball or golf or something there is no way. He needs something that he is totally interested in and passionate about. |
So growing up you never had coaches complain that you weren't focused, lacked field vision, or appeared distracted or bored on the field? I believe DC found the right sport, and DC definitely needs exercise to stay sane, but full games are really hard. When it's 1v1, 2v2 or 3v3 drills or small area games, DC is easily one of the top couple players on the team, but when the game gets bigger, DC gets lost. Hoping DC will grow out of it like a PP's kid, or DC can always downgrade to a less competitive travel team and play in high school. |