Appropriate punishment for 6.5

[Anonymous]

Apparently my 6.5 thought it would be a good idea to scratch a figure of a person into the side indoor of my car with a rock. It is a stick figure about 8" tall right in the middle of his passenger door.

I'm at a loss of what to do about this.

What is the appropriate punishment or manner to approach this???

Thanks.

[Anonymous]

Should say "door" instead of "indoor".

Dumb phone.

[Anonymous]

Ugh! My 5 year old still writes on the friggin wall occasionally but that takes the cake for sure.

Are you going to get it repaired or leave it? If you are going to get it repaired, it will cost money. I would sit him down and tell him that what he did was an expensive mistake that's going to cost you a lot of money. Money that you could have spent elsewhere. I'd put up a chore chart for the next month and make him do one thing every day that he's not doing already as a way of "repaying" the lost money. Doesn't have to be brutal. Putting away dishes. Sweeping the kitchen. Taking out trash. Mark off each day he completes until he's done. It will remind him daily for a long time about what he did.

And of course, have a discussion about how expensive things are and how we try to take care of them to make them last. He wouldn't want you to ruin one of his toys or something else he cares about, would he?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ugh! My 5 year old still writes on the friggin wall occasionally but that takes the cake for sure.

Are you going to get it repaired or leave it? If you are going to get it repaired, it will cost money. I would sit him down and tell him that what he did was an expensive mistake that's going to cost you a lot of money. Money that you could have spent elsewhere. I'd put up a chore chart for the next month and make him do one thing every day that he's not doing already as a way of "repaying" the lost money. Doesn't have to be brutal. Putting away dishes. Sweeping the kitchen. Taking out trash. Mark off each day he completes until he's done. It will remind him daily for a long time about what he did.

And of course, have a discussion about how expensive things are and how we try to take care of them to make them last. He wouldn't want you to ruin one of his toys or something else he cares about, would he?

This is a very good idea.

[Anonymous]

Mom of a 6.5 year old here: First, kudos to you OP for not strangling your precious one. Ugh, I feel for you!

The suggestion by 9:44 is excellent. The only thing I would add is pretty obvious: ds will not be receiving any special treats, toys or gifts until the debt is paid off.

[Anonymous]

My daughter caused us to require an expensive home repair last year. I showed her the bill for the repair and said, "It caused $XXX to repair the damage you caused. Your Nintendo DS games cost about $30 each. Your wii games are about the same amount. Until the entire amount is paid off, I will be taking your birthday and Christmas money. Any time you ask for a game, the answer is no. And we will decide which of your birthday and Christmas presents to return to pay for the debt."

I made her pay back every last cent. She completely eliminated the carelessness that led to the problem in the first place.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My daughter caused us to require an expensive home repair last year. I showed her the bill for the repair and said, "It caused $XXX to repair the damage you caused. Your Nintendo DS games cost about $30 each. Your wii games are about the same amount. Until the entire amount is paid off, I will be taking your birthday and Christmas money. Any time you ask for a game, the answer is no. And we will decide which of your birthday and Christmas presents to return to pay for the debt."

I made her pay back every last cent. She completely eliminated the carelessness that led to the problem in the first place.

Wondering how old your daughter is. I did this for one of my kids, but he was 13 at the time.

Not quite the same thing, OP, but many years ago I had a 6.5 year old foster child who keyed my car door. It probably took me two hours before I could talk to anyone I was so mad.

[Anonymous]

Your DS should have to do chores like the PP said, but also, make him wash the car (know he won't do a good job) by himself every weekend for a couple of months.

[Anonymous]

I'd go with the chores, myself. But do make sure before you impose something draconian that your kid understood before he drew on the car that it was a permanent, expensive, wrong thing to do. If he had done it in chalk he wouldn't have gotten in trouble, but he did it in rock so the sh*^ hits the fan. Six is still pretty young, and sometimes their brains don't catch up to their actions.

[Anonymous]

OP here.

I had a conversation with him last night. He will be doing additional chores like the PP mentioned.

I also told him that I was "disappointed" that he would do this. I think that made the most impact. He ran up to his room and cried right after, so the thought of disappointing me must have made him upset.

I'm still upset, but it doesn't look like it pierced more than the clear coating...hopefully.