Older kids/do you need more space

[Anonymous]

We have a 4 bedroom house, 3 bathrooms, plus a large size basement, big yard. Not a fancy home by any means. We bought it because we lucked out and found a house that size in our price range. However, the upkeep is a hassle with a big house and everything you do to it cost more. We have two children 2-4 age range. We can afford the mortgage but didn't anticipate all the costs associated with a house built in the 70s that needs various aspects updated.

We are thinking of buying a SFH instead and selling the current place. It's a good neighborhood and excellent schools, inventory is low right now so the few houses in the neighborhood sold quickly. We have equity but of course, there would transactions fees associated with selling and buying a place. We're simple people and somewhat feel more comfortable with a more downsized lifestyle.

Some people have advised us to keep the bigger house because as the children grow older you need more space. Is this true? Is it crazy to downsize considering we can afford the current mortgage.

[Anonymous]

Meant to say, we're thinking of buying a SMALLER SFH.

[Anonymous]

Yes. You will definitely need more space. This was something we did not anticipate. We're now moving.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have a 4 bedroom house, 3 bathrooms, plus a large size basement, big yard. Not a fancy home by any means. We bought it because we lucked out and found a house that size in our price range. However, the upkeep is a hassle with a big house and everything you do to it cost more. We have two children 2-4 age range. We can afford the mortgage but didn't anticipate all the costs associated with a house built in the 70s that needs various aspects updated.

We are thinking of buying a SFH instead and selling the current place. It's a good neighborhood and excellent schools, inventory is low right now so the few houses in the neighborhood sold quickly. We have equity but of course, there would transactions fees associated with selling and buying a place. We're simple people and somewhat feel more comfortable with a more downsized lifestyle.

Some people have advised us to keep the bigger house because as the children grow older you need more space. Is this true? Is it crazy to downsize considering we can afford the current mortgage.

When they become teens you WANT your home to be the center! Trust me on that. So bigger is better!

[Anonymous]

No you want more space, 3000 sqrft minimum for 2 kids anything less is cramped

[Anonymous]

I think you'll want the space and I agree that you'll want your home to be the hang out. My parents redid our basement and put in a pool table specifically so we'd all hang out there. Just think, that way you know where your kids are and basically what they are doing but they feel like they are in their own space. BTW, my parents didn't tell me that they planned it that way when they redid the basement, but it worked out exactly as they wanted and my group of about 10 friends hung out there constantly.

[Anonymous]

We have 2 teens and about 2300 sq. feet, and it is plenty of room. Our kids spend a lot of time in their rooms. We do have a room in the basement where the kids and their friends watch tv and play video games. As long as older kids have their own 'hangout' space, you'll be fine.

[Anonymous]

I think its the size and access to things to do that matter for teens. Our house is 2700 sqft with 3 kids 10-14 and its ok. We thought about moving out of the city but i didn't want to have a big house and yard after the kids left and here they can walk to friends/schools/shops/theatre.

[Anonymous]

We're way less than 3000 sq ft, maybe like 2200 and with three kids, it's fine. What matters is giving them their own rooms or space and having a kid friendly family space. We have a family room with comfortable modular furniture that can e rearranged easily, a genuinely fine Tv with video games - Wii and xbox - and a dvd (or maybe blue fay player, cant remember) and a pool table. We have another living room that is just a stairway away so you can hear what's happening in the kid space. One thing we don't have is a guest room, but my kids are fine with giving up their bedrooms for company.

[Anonymous]

I have 1 kid and 1200 sq, so the spaces folks are describing sound like mansions to me! But seriously, I would think you could downsize if you don't like your house and still get a house with a bedroom for each kid and a finished basement for teens to hang out in. My house has that, and it is small. And about making your house the teen hangout...do people really think that is about how big/nice the house is? I remember when I was a teen it was more about who was the popular kid, and how good the vibe in the house was.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No you want more space, 3000 sqrft minimum for 2 kids anything less is cramped

This is a joke right?

[Anonymous]

I agree, it is more about the layout and features than the actual square footage.

My older son is ten now and I've noticed that within the last year or so, he and his friends have started going down in our unfinished basement. They like to have a "getaway" space where they can kind of horse around. My friends with daughters say bathrooms are important in the teenage years, so something to weigh. You also need to consider whether you will have adequate storage for the myriad of bikes, skateboards, scooters, and balls that inevitably come with older kids. Oh, and sports equipment -- you'd be surprised how much of that you might have.

Going to school also will have an impact. Every day your kids will walk in the door and dump their backbacks, lunchboxes, jackets and shoes--where will those go? Also consider whether you have a good space for the kids to do their homework. Particularly in the younger elementary years, you may want to have them somewhere central. Some of their projects and supplies may "live" in this space, so you can't necessarily count on clearing the area after homework is done (or if you do, it will need a dedicated space.) As they get older, consider whether you'll have a public space for computer/internet usage.

Me, I'd take a smaller house with a mudroom and garage over a larger house without those features.

[Anonymous]

Between buying a larger home in a completely car-dependent area, versus buying a smaller home with good public transportation (which teenagers can use), which one is seen as more desirable?

I grew up abroad, in a place where I easily had access to public transportation as a teenager. I cannot see myself moving to a place where my kids, when they grow up to be teenagers, need to be ferried around in cars...

[Anonymous]

We are some of those strange people who moved from the suburbs 4000 sq ft. to the city (2400 sq ft) with 4 kids. We do have a finished basement which is the kids own space but only have 3 bd rooms so everyone shares. It is a trade off for us. I miss my big huge kitchen but I don't miss the commute or the school bus. My kids are much happier in the city as are we. As they get older I feel like they actually need less space for toys and play area but more space for video games, studying, non-bunk beds, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Between buying a larger home in a completely car-dependent area, versus buying a smaller home with good public transportation (which teenagers can use), which one is seen as more desirable?

I grew up abroad, in a place where I easily had access to public transportation as a teenager. I cannot see myself moving to a place where my kids, when they grow up to be teenagers, need to be ferried around in cars...

Definitely closer in, and well-designed (as opposed to simply having a lot of sq footage). If your children can walk or take public transit without transfers to your home, that would be ideal. The statistics on having two+ teens in a car are frightening (basically, having a teen driver is dangerous--when you add another teen to the car, the rates of fatal accidents double). As the PP before you noted, having some private space--like a useable basement which is private but within earshot--is more important for teens than simply having a lot of space with no privacy.