is this good advice from OB????

[Anonymous]

I am turning 38 next week and although this sounds so stupid, I can hardly believe it. I've been taking care of my ailing Mother for the past 5 years and suddenly, my husband and I are realizing that time is of the essence for us. We have no kids, been married for 12 years and this is our second month TTC.

I had an OB appointment the other day and I asked how long we should TTC before I go see a fertility specialist. She simply replied, "oh about six months more." Is that too long to try before going to see a fertility specialist (I guess that is what an "RE" is--clearly I am new to this board)? She seemed so nonchalant about it.

I know I sound alarmist but I just want to make sure that is good advice. Not that I don't like sex or anything but I don't want to waste any time!

Has anyone else been given advice on how long to TTC? I have very regular cycles and am using the ovulation prediction strips.

Thanks so much.

[Anonymous]

The typical advice is to go see the RE after 6 months of trying if you're over 35, so your OB isn't too far off.

[Anonymous]

Agree with PP, that the usual advice for women over 35 is to try for 6 months first. I think your OB is pretty much on the mark since my RE has always said that couple of months is not going to make a difference one way or the other even when you are over 40. I'd definitely recommend charting if you are not already doing so -- it is more accurate than the strips.

[Anonymous]

I'm 39 (38.5 when I started), and my OB told me to call him after 4 months of trying. This thing is, once you get to a certain age and egg supply/quality level, some of the reproductive technologies don't work very well. That's not to mean that you can't get pregnant; just that if you need some of the help of ART, it won't work as well.

I second that you start charting ASAP to make sure you're having sex at the right time of the month. Age can make the timing of ovulation change - some women start to ovulate later (my friend found out she was ovulating on day 17 when she TTC at 39), and some earlier (I found I ovulate at day 12).

Also, if you're really stressed, have your DH get tested right now. It is only $100 out of pocket and not much effort on his part, and 40% of fertility problems are male factor so it may ease your worries (or tell you that you need to see an RE now).

Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm 39 (38.5 when I started), and my OB told me to call him after 4 months of trying. This thing is, once you get to a certain age and egg supply/quality level, some of the reproductive technologies don't work very well. That's not to mean that you can't get pregnant; just that if you need some of the help of ART, it won't work as well.

I second that you start charting ASAP to make sure you're having sex at the right time of the month. Age can make the timing of ovulation change - some women start to ovulate later (my friend found out she was ovulating on day 17 when she TTC at 39), and some earlier (I found I ovulate at day 12).

Also, if you're really stressed, have your DH get tested right now. It is only $100 out of pocket and not much effort on his part, and 40% of fertility problems are male factor so it may ease your worries (or tell you that you need to see an RE now).

Good luck!

Great, great advice. It took me 5 years of TTC before I had DS, and I wish someone gave me all these tips so I didn't waste so much time.

[Anonymous]

Your OB's advice is standard wisdom.

Even better - during the next 6 months, get Taking Charge of Your Fertility, chart according to its instructions and TTC accordingly.

It's the best resource.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your OB's advice is standard wisdom.

Even better - during the next 6 months, get Taking Charge of Your Fertility, chart according to its instructions and TTC accordingly.

It's the best resource.

PP here again - you can also ask your OB to run a test to see what your FSH (follicle stimulating hormone) is - it's a simple blood test taken on day 3 of your cycle that gives you a sense of your ovarian reserve.

[Anonymous]

i'm under 30 and standard wisdom says i should have tried for a year. well, i bucked tradition and saw an RE ("reproductive endocrinologist") after about 5 months of trying, but i had obvious issues, such as irregular cycles, my temp charts looked all wacky etc ... i just knew there was something wrong (and there was -- hormone imbalance).

i don't think any RE would turn you away if you went after trying for just a couple of months, they'd understand given your 'advanced maternal age" (sorry to use the icky term but that's what they call it).

i used dr. sacks at columbia fertility and absolutely loved him (and i'm 18 weeks pregnant!), FYI.

[Anonymous]

Standard advice under 35 is one year and above 35 six months. 35 isn't a magical number, it has just established itself over the years.

Charting can be useful, but 2 months isn't a very long time TTC - so I don't think that is something to truly worry out about. To learn more about charting, ovulation etc, you should look at the book "Taking Charge of Your Fertility" often called TCYF or TCOYF on this board. I found temping just as reliable (and cheaper) than the sticks.

Can't hurt to see an RE if you and your husband want to go down that path.

What I would look into is maybe acupuncture - it can do wonders also for relieving some stress and tension. (You can do a search on this board for acupuncture and will find a lot of info).

[Anonymous]

Get the clear blue easy fertility monitor -- works like a charm. Shows you when you are at high and peak fertility so you can time sex. There's no guesswork either like there is with temps, cervical mucus, and traditional ovulation predictor kits.
If you don't have success after 4 months of doing this, see an RE. And certainly if you find you aren't ovulating (no peak detected by monitor), see an RE sooner. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

I'm also 38 and my RE told me to try for 6 months before we take the next step. This is currently month 3. It seems like forever, but really unless you suspect there is something wrong 6 months is pretty standard.

I've been charting and I also just started using OPK this month. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Hey OP - Been there.

My OB said 4 months at 35. I can tell you this as a statistician, though. There's no point in "wasting" the four months when you could be collecting useful data.

I highly recommend charting. Start tomorrow. The point of the exercise is to learn about your cycle so that if you are unlucky and don't get pregnant, you can march into that first appointment with information. That can save you months.

I believe Taking Control of Your Fertility is better than the predictor kits - gives more info. Plus, you will be a better advocate for yourself if you know more about women's bodies (and yours in particular). It is a fascinating read.

I see above that you already got this advice. So here I am seconding it. If it weren't for my serious knowledge about my own body, I'd certainly not have gotten pregnant the day I did.

(Oh, and if someone says "just have sex. all that OPT stuff will just make you tense" - I suspect since you posted that the pressure is already on. More knowledge made at least some of our sex better - after I ovulated, we'd relax and enjoy sex again which was better than not relaxing at all.)