honest question - what do we do with our kids after May 29?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:not to be obnoxious but nurses have been the backbone of the corona response and no one has rewarded us financially. I'm making $42/hour as an RN /MSN to work in a DC hospital with corona patients and many of my coworkers who have less experience are making $35/hour. (72k/year)
Nurses and teachers have never been paid what they're worth and even now when we're vital to society no one is suggesting we get paid more. 😫

+1

My mother works at a hospital in NY and got a bonus this week for working under these conditions. Not the same as a pay raise but hopefully more hospitals will follow suit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Umm, be a parent and take care of your kids...

Instead of working?

[Anonymous]

I’m trying to find a part time nanny or baby sitter for at least 15 hours a week to entertain kid. Most families I know with really young kids already started bringing back their nannies fully time this week.
Also, despite all the Social distance shaming on social media, it seems like every family is still doing limited play dates with a few other families, planning vacations this summer and hiring nannies.

[Anonymous]

No one we know is doing play dates.

[Anonymous]

What you mean by a play date? We let our kids kick soccer balls back and forth in our back alley with a few other kids who live on our row, everybody wearing masks and staying at least 10 feet apart by agreement of the parents. That's about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I knew this was coming and I'm still SO ANGRY. The work from school and the connections to the other kids is what is keeping my kid in a routine and alleviating anxiety. This just leaves us all to fend for ourselves and is totally abandoning the kids.

Repeat after me: as parents we are 100% responsible for our children 100% of the time.

Jeez, have some empathy. Families have set up routines that allow their lives to work smoothly. It's all been upended. What do you get out of scolding people who are overwhelmed by unexpected circumstances?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I knew this was coming and I'm still SO ANGRY. The work from school and the connections to the other kids is what is keeping my kid in a routine and alleviating anxiety. This just leaves us all to fend for ourselves and is totally abandoning the kids.

Repeat after me: as parents we are 100% responsible for our children 100% of the time.

Jeez, have some empathy. Families have set up routines that allow their lives to work smoothly. It's all been upended. What do you get out of scolding people who are overwhelmed by unexpected circumstances?

PP, I just don't even think it's worth acknowledging these holier-than-thou snarky comments. All we do is give those people oxygen when they aren't interested in being helpful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I knew this was coming and I'm still SO ANGRY. The work from school and the connections to the other kids is what is keeping my kid in a routine and alleviating anxiety. This just leaves us all to fend for ourselves and is totally abandoning the kids.

Repeat after me: as parents we are 100% responsible for our children 100% of the time.

Jeez, have some empathy. Families have set up routines that allow their lives to work smoothly. It's all been upended. What do you get out of scolding people who are overwhelmed by unexpected circumstances?

PP, I just don't even think it's worth acknowledging these holier-than-thou snarky comments. All we do is give those people oxygen when they aren't interested in being helpful.

Also, it's a weird mentality. Of course parents are 100% responsible ultimately, but, remember the whole "it takes a village"? It's like a strange form of extreme individualism taking hold here. We've always depended on others - family members, paid help, teachers, just the neighbor down the street - and in many societies, children belong to the entire village. It's a very unnatural moment to have to isolate with our tiny nuclear families and no one else.

I think it goes to show that we're going down a very unhealthy path by assuming that a child is the responsibility of the parents alone in the sense PP means. It's not some kind of abdication of responsibility for our offspring, or selfishness, or lack of parenting skill or love for our children that is causing us to panic right now. It's not normal and never should be to not have help with our kids and help each other out.

That said, I do understand a kind of "servant" aristocracy perspective with which some parents may treat their teachers, more akin to the use of a nursemaid or governess in the olden days. This attitude may also be there among parents, but I haven't seen it on this thread. Can't we see that mainly, it's women in general who are suffering the brunt of this situation even as the disease hits men more?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I knew this was coming and I'm still SO ANGRY. The work from school and the connections to the other kids is what is keeping my kid in a routine and alleviating anxiety. This just leaves us all to fend for ourselves and is totally abandoning the kids.

Repeat after me: as parents we are 100% responsible for our children 100% of the time.

Jeez, have some empathy. Families have set up routines that allow their lives to work smoothly. It's all been upended. What do you get out of scolding people who are overwhelmed by unexpected circumstances?

PP, I just don't even think it's worth acknowledging these holier-than-thou snarky comments. All we do is give those people oxygen when they aren't interested in being helpful.

Also, it's a weird mentality. Of course parents are 100% responsible ultimately, but, remember the whole "it takes a village"? It's like a strange form of extreme individualism taking hold here. We've always depended on others - family members, paid help, teachers, just the neighbor down the street - and in many societies, children belong to the entire village. It's a very unnatural moment to have to isolate with our tiny nuclear families and no one else.

I think it goes to show that we're going down a very unhealthy path by assuming that a child is the responsibility of the parents alone in the sense PP means. It's not some kind of abdication of responsibility for our offspring, or selfishness, or lack of parenting skill or love for our children that is causing us to panic right now. It's not normal and never should be to not have help with our kids and help each other out.

That said, I do understand a kind of "servant" aristocracy perspective with which some parents may treat their teachers, more akin to the use of a nursemaid or governess in the olden days. This attitude may also be there among parents, but I haven't seen it on this thread. Can't we see that mainly, it's women in general who are suffering the brunt of this situation even as the disease hits men more?

You don’t see it on this thread because a large portion was deleted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I knew this was coming and I'm still SO ANGRY. The work from school and the connections to the other kids is what is keeping my kid in a routine and alleviating anxiety. This just leaves us all to fend for ourselves and is totally abandoning the kids.

Repeat after me: as parents we are 100% responsible for our children 100% of the time.

Jeez, have some empathy. Families have set up routines that allow their lives to work smoothly. It's all been upended. What do you get out of scolding people who are overwhelmed by unexpected circumstances?

I guess if you can't manage your children turn them over to foster care.

People have been caring for children for thousands of years. Hire a teenager. Hire a college student. Hire a grandma. Fly in a senior relative to live with you. Ask at your local house of worship. Generally they will have an elderly lady looking for some cash.

Summer comes around every year. Parents should be responsible for their children.

Parents have had their lives upended for thousands of years due to wars and pestilence and moving to new countries. Resilience. Resilience. Resilience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I knew this was coming and I'm still SO ANGRY. The work from school and the connections to the other kids is what is keeping my kid in a routine and alleviating anxiety. This just leaves us all to fend for ourselves and is totally abandoning the kids.

Repeat after me: as parents we are 100% responsible for our children 100% of the time.

Jeez, have some empathy. Families have set up routines that allow their lives to work smoothly. It's all been upended. What do you get out of scolding people who are overwhelmed by unexpected circumstances?

I guess if you can't manage your children turn them over to foster care.

People have been caring for children for thousands of years. Hire a teenager. Hire a college student. Hire a grandma. Fly in a senior relative to live with you. Ask at your local house of worship. Generally they will have an elderly lady looking for some cash.

Summer comes around every year. Parents should be responsible for their children.

Parents have had their lives upended for thousands of years due to wars and pestilence and moving to new countries. Resilience. Resilience. Resilience.

This is ridiculous:

1. Many people who move to a new country send their kids to daycare or use school as the main form of childcare.
2. It is more difficult to find people to hire given everything is shut down due to a contagious disease.
3. It is more difficult to fly in older family members because this is due to a contagious disease that disproportionately affects older people.
4. If there was a war on US soil I don't think Sue from HR would need to worry about childcare because there would be no one working during said war.
5. For most of the past thousand years there hasn't been the internet so most people weren't expected to work from home in times of emergency.

Stop saying you chose to have a child so deal with it in these extreme times. Otherwise there's a list of other things you should be posting about choice:
1. You chose to smoke so you don't get healthcare just deal with your cancer
2. You chose to become a doctor so suck it up that there isn't PPE available
3. You chose have children while you were impoverished so suck it up and don't use welfare
4. You chose to get married so suck it up if your spouse cheats

[Anonymous]

I think the issue is that some posters are asking school staff to risk their health (and the health of their families) to educate, or in certain examples babysit, your children so you can work from home in peace. It’s just incredibly inconsiderate
I understand how stressful this all is for everyone, but we have to think of the well-being of everyone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think the issue is that some posters are asking school staff to risk their health (and the health of their families) to educate, or in certain examples babysit, your children so you can work from home in peace. It’s just incredibly inconsiderate
I understand how stressful this all is for everyone, but we have to think of the well-being of everyone.

I think people are not just wanting child care. In-person school is truly better for kids' education. For summer they need activities. Sure, they could wander the neighborhood but no one does that anymore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the issue is that some posters are asking school staff to risk their health (and the health of their families) to educate, or in certain examples babysit, your children so you can work from home in peace. It’s just incredibly inconsiderate
I understand how stressful this all is for everyone, but we have to think of the well-being of everyone.

I think people are not just wanting child care. In-person school is truly better for kids' education. For summer they need activities. Sure, they could wander the neighborhood but no one does that anymore.

Maybe they will again. Congregating in large groups is dangerous right now. That includes camps, schools, and daycares. I think you should hire a nanny if you’re working and want someone to focus on entertaining your kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the issue is that some posters are asking school staff to risk their health (and the health of their families) to educate, or in certain examples babysit, your children so you can work from home in peace. It’s just incredibly inconsiderate
I understand how stressful this all is for everyone, but we have to think of the well-being of everyone.

I think people are not just wanting child care. In-person school is truly better for kids' education. For summer they need activities. Sure, they could wander the neighborhood but no one does that anymore.

A little more wandering the neighborhood would be good for all our kids who are over the age of 6-7. The pendulum has swung too far in the direction of planned/scheduled/professional experiences. An old school summer would honestly be one that they'd actually remember.