What do you do when you know someone is lying to you?

[Anonymous]

A friend of mine was in a shop a few towns over and overheard a stranger telling the shop owner about selling her property next spring but that she wasn't telling her tenants until they renewed their lease. She was very open with her whole life story. My friend couldnt help listening in, thinking what a biatch, when she finally heard my address. My friend was able to list so many personal details (name, spouse name, where they reside, even details about her spouse's ex) that I am 100% positive it was our landlord. It also makes sense why she wanted us to extend our lease in a way that we've not done in 3 years.

Fast forward a few weeks, she questioned our hesitance to sign the lease. I told her because we'd heard she was going to list in the spring and we would prefer to move in the summer rather than next spring. She responded she wasnt intending to sell, she was confused why we thought that and has gone so far to tell me 3 more times since then that she wasnt selling. My dh says let it go and we'll just proceed with our plans to move. But I can't stand the thought that she's lied repeatedly to me and I want to call her out on it. Would you confront and tell her you know she's fos or just let it go? I want her to know we know she lied and that she's a numbskull for outting herself with her big mouth!

[Anonymous]

i'd definitely be sort of confrontational with her!

[Anonymous]

What is the new/unusual way she wants you to extend your lease? You could always request that before you sign the lease, she amend the lease to include a provision that if she sells the house, that sale has to be arranged so that you are able to stay in the house as tenants until the summer. If she balks, then you know she's full of crap. But I wouldn't be confrontational with her; in fact, be glad that she's got a big mouth and your friend was able to overhear it and alert you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What is the new/unusual way she wants you to extend your lease? You could always request that before you sign the lease, she amend the lease to include a provision that if she sells the house, that sale has to be arranged so that you are able to stay in the house as tenants until the summer. If she balks, then you know she's full of crap. But I wouldn't be confrontational with her; in fact, be glad that she's got a big mouth and your friend was able to overhear it and alert you!

I like this idea. Ask for a clause in the lease that if they break it early to sell the home they give you 60 days notice and pay your relocation costs.

[Anonymous]

Agree with PP; address it as a lease clause. Lots of standard leases out there on the Internet to give you text to work with.

[Anonymous]

What good would come of calling her out. She already knows you know se is lying.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What good would come of calling her out. She already knows you know se is lying.

Why do you say she already knows?

[Anonymous]

Yes after she provides you with an excellent reference.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What good would come of calling her out. She already knows you know se is lying.

Why do you say she already knows?

Ecause OP already told her that she heard she was listing the property. No matter how much she denies it, she knows.

[Anonymous]

What, and people don't change their minds? My mother is a realtor and she knows many people that come to her with definite ideas about what they want to do and when and when she talks to them about listing, issues, etc, they change their mind. How do you know that the landlord wasn't talking about her plans before she spoke to a realtor about listing/selling in the spring and then spoke to a realtor and changed to selling in the summer? It could happen.

Since you don't know that the landlord is lying, you only suspect she is, just protect yourself as stated by putting clauses into the lease before you renew.

[Anonymous]

Business poker face.

[Anonymous]

Op here. Our lease is month to month right now because she didn't have us renew last fall. She wants us to sign now but for a period ending in the spring. (So resetting the end dates, and for a period less than 1 year.) I was a little suspicious when she asked but didn't really care until friend overheard. With a baby, I just want to move on my terms and where we will go has more turnover in the summer than any other time, so moving in the next few months makes more sense. If I really cared about staying here, the idea of the clause would be great! But since now is a good time to downsize (my oldest just graduated so I'm no longer concerned with schools) I can save just under $1000 month moving closer to dh's work.

Anyway lots of details that aren't super relevant. I just wondered if people confront liars or if its just better in the long run to nod your head, bite your tongue and remain silent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What, and people don't change their minds? My mother is a realtor and she knows many people that come to her with definite ideas about what they want to do and when and when she talks to them about listing, issues, etc, they change their mind. How do you know that the landlord wasn't talking about her plans before she spoke to a realtor about listing/selling in the spring and then spoke to a realtor and changed to selling in the summer? It could happen.

Since you don't know that the landlord is lying, you only suspect she is, just protect yourself as stated by putting clauses into the lease before you renew.

You bring up a valid point, but that she was bragging she wasn't going to tell her tenants until they renewed is very telling, wouldn't you agree?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What, and people don't change their minds? My mother is a realtor and she knows many people that come to her with definite ideas about what they want to do and when and when she talks to them about listing, issues, etc, they change their mind. How do you know that the landlord wasn't talking about her plans before she spoke to a realtor about listing/selling in the spring and then spoke to a realtor and changed to selling in the summer? It could happen.

Since you don't know that the landlord is lying, you only suspect she is, just protect yourself as stated by putting clauses into the lease before you renew.

You bring up a valid point, but that she was bragging she wasn't going to tell her tenants until they renewed is very telling, wouldn't you agree?

Absolutely. And I agree that the landlord is likely to be lying, but that's still a far cry from definitely lying. And nowhere close to where I would accuse someone of lying. Some people have too much verbal diarrhea and too little sense to stop talking. And many of them talk about things that they are thinking about rather than things that they have already planned. Besides, the plan that is being 'bragged' about is at least 9 months away. A lot can change in 9 months that may affect whatever schedule the landlord has in mind.

For all of that, it really doesn't matter if the landlord is lying or not. What matters is that OP do what she needs to do, either moving now (as her most recent post suggests) or writing in a clause saying something to the effect of the landlord must give 60 days notice after listing and must include a clause in any listing that says that the new owners cannot terminate the lease early. These protections will keep the landlord from selling the home from under their feet.