Neighbor is afraid of dogs and scaring my kids and dogs

[Anonymous]

Our new neighbor has two kids the same age as mine - 4 and almost 7. I take my kids and our dogs down to a cleared area in the woods behind the house every afternoon to throw balls for our dogs. We all have a great time. Other kids also come down and play and there are some days where there will be a couple of moms, three or four dogs and a pack of kids playing and throwing balls and running around. It is one of the things that I love about the neighborhood. Yesterday the new kids came down (think they moved in at the winter break) to play and things were fine until one of my dogs tried to bring a ball to the new 7 year old. The little girl screamed and the Mom, who was just coming down the path, went NUTS. Started yelling about the leash law and calling the police and vicious animals. My kids started crying, our dogs started barking and hiding behind my kids, and I just stood there kind of apologizing and trying to get everyone to calm down. I know that we are technically "breaking the law" by letting the dogs get the balls, but it's become such a nice meeting and playing time for the rest of the neighbors that I can't help but be upset with her. I'm still upset about this because I feel guilty, but I also feel she overreacted because she doesn't understand dogs.

[Anonymous]

Some people are just nuts. Ignore them.

[Anonymous]

She has a point OP. If she is trying to mind your business on your property, get a good lawyer or the SPCA would be glad to back you up.

There are some moms that have an irrational fear of animals, that is not your problem.

[Anonymous]

Seriously, the least law isn't something you follow if you feel like it. I don't care that it's become such a nice gathering space, etc. Take the dog to a Dog Park. This Mom is entirely in the right, even if she didn't express her wishes in the most diplomatic way. If you want to exercise your dogs, take them to the dog park.

Signed, owner of two dogs.

[Anonymous]

You did the right thing by apologizing. If she does not come from an area where off-leash dogs are the norm (many places it is not) and if the first introduction to your dogs was seeing one approach her daughter and upset her, she had a reason to be mad. Kids trump dogs.

That being said, hopefully you explained yourself well enough, and enough of your neighbors explain the situation, that she will come to understand it, accept it and maybe participate in the gatherings. It does sound like a fun thing you have going for all involved!

[Anonymous]

There was a big discussion on here recently about leash laws and most people want to see you obeying them. However, as a dog owner who walks my dog on a leash, I don't see a problem with you letting your dogs off leash in an area like this. I like to do this with my dog in the appropriate setting because she listens to me and is very friendly. If you can control your dog and it is not endangering anyone then I don't see the problem and would hope your neighbor could calm down long enough to see the same thing. But some people are that scared of dogs or don't like them enough that they will turn you in so just be aware.

I remember the days growing up when I used to walk my dog everywhere without a leash and nobody ever said a thing to me because she was so well behaved. Now everyone is so scared of "what ifs" that they can't handle an owner who knows the limits of its pet.

FWIW, when I walk through my local park there are several dogs who are always off leash. I have no problem with this whatsoever because they always obey their owners and have never done anything to make me nervous. I think people need to be allowed to use their best judgement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You did the right thing by apologizing. If she does not come from an area where off-leash dogs are the norm (many places it is not) and if the first introduction to your dogs was seeing one approach her daughter and upset her, she had a reason to be mad. Kids trump dogs.

That being said, hopefully you explained yourself well enough, and enough of your neighbors explain the situation, that she will come to understand it, accept it and maybe participate in the gatherings. It does sound like a fun thing you have going for all involved!

No, I don't think this is the right answer. OP doesn't have any right to exercise her dogs offleash in this area.

[Anonymous]

It's possible that she, or the child, or both, has a phobia of dogs. If so, they can't be convinced that the dog is actually harmless--I'd hope that the mom could understand it intellectually, but the fear is just overwhelming.

Because you are breaking the law by having your dogs off-leash, you're going to need to reach some kind of agreement that will prevent your new neighbor from calling the police the next time she sees your dog off-leash. Maybe you can have them off-leash for only a short period of time, or can leash them as soon as you see this family joining the gathering.

It sounds like a lovely daily gathering, and it's very sad that it can't go on the way it had. However, the law is not on your side here.

[Anonymous]

OP. You are an asshole if you don't think she has a right to be upset. Obey the law concerning your dogs! Put them on a leash or keep them in your own yard.

[Anonymous]

I would quietly and rationally explain to her that this is a neighborhood tradition and a good time for those with kids and dogs (or who like dogs.) Since the dogs are not going near her house or her kids, rather her kids were coming down to where the dogs were playing, tell her the hours that you normally go there and ask her to keep her kids away during those windows. Stress that you will only let your dogs off leash in this wooded area that she and her kids do not have to frequent. You will not let the dogs off leash near their house or on your street.

Then, invite her to some other neighborhood event so that she doesn't feel like you are trying to exclude her or keep her from being a part of the community.

[Anonymous]

Some people have a genuine phobia of dogs. It may not seem rational to you, but it's very real to them.

Try to start looking at this with a little compassion. If you can't do that, then just obey the leash law.

[Anonymous]

Go to an off-leash dog park if you want to let your dog off leash when you're not on your own property. I adore dogs, have two big dogs--don't let them off leash. Actually, it's also for the dogs' sake. It sounds like you may not have had an issue with a dog trying to run off, but it takes just once and does happen all the time, including for the first time.

[Anonymous]

Obey the law. The mother was 100% right. She should have called animal control.

[Anonymous]

Nice try neighbor but that's not exactly how it happened. And you know that.

[Anonymous]

I have a dog that I would love to let off leash, but I don't. I think that the neighbor's reaction is extreme, but she is in the right here. There is a law, and it is there for a reason. I'm sure that your dog really is friendly and well behaved, but several of my neighbors would say the same thing about their dogs, 2 of whom have run into the street to attack my leashed dog. I love dogs, but I now get quite paranoid to see one off leash, because I don't know if it is friendly until too late.