What to do for a friend whose son has a terrible illness

[Anonymous]

I'm looking for suggestions here.

My son's little friend (they are 3) has been diagnosed with a horrible, life-threatening illness. Even if he survives the initial surgeries, he will probably have a significantly shortened lifespan with many difficulties ahead. I am friends with the mom too, but not super close. I met her when our sons were 1 month old.

So I'm hoping for suggestions for things I can do to show my support. i have already called her and sent a card, but I feel like I should do more. I'd like to do something really thoughtful, but I am coming up with nothing. Any ideas?

[Anonymous]

Does she have other children? If so, take the other children and shower them with attention.

If you make a "gift a day" basket (basket with dollar store games to play in bed, etc.,), make one for the other child, too.

This will alleviate the guilt and anxiety that the mom is feeling about the rest of her family.

Offer to do her grocery shopping for her. Take whatever comfort food you know she likes that is microwavable only and leave it on a cooler on the front steps. Offer to do her laundry.

Just brainstorms - I am so sorry she is going through this and I know that it is hard to watch, too. Prayers to you all

[Anonymous]

Keep in touch, express concern, and ask how the child is doing. My child had a long and uncertain recovery after an accident, and I appreciated having friends assume the burden of keeping in touch and am especially grateful for the few who continued to check in after the shock of the initial accident and diagnosis had subsided but while we were still going through hell.

Also, if the child is able to receive visitors, do try to help him keep up as much contact with other children as possible. Illness can be so isolating for kids.

It's lovely of you to offer your support.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does she have other children? If so, take the other children and shower them with attention.

If you make a "gift a day" basket (basket with dollar store games to play in bed, etc.,), make one for the other child, too.

This will alleviate the guilt and anxiety that the mom is feeling about the rest of her family.

Offer to do her grocery shopping for her. Take whatever comfort food you know she likes that is microwavable only and leave it on a cooler on the front steps. Offer to do her laundry.

Just brainstorms - I am so sorry she is going through this and I know that it is hard to watch, too. Prayers to you all

These are great suggestions.

Chores will pile up so jump in. Offer to take the other kids out with your kids on weekends or for a few hours to the movies, etc. Also, start a fund for her parking at the hospital if you can on Paypal and ask people to contribute. It gets really expensive and is something people don't think about. If they are federal employees, see if you can do leave donation for them.

[Anonymous]

If they're in the hospital, bring food and clean soft clothes for mom.

[Anonymous]

Check out helpinghands.org