Can men and women just be friends?

[Anonymous]

I don't mean superficial friends but close friends. What if they are married, does that make it harder to have close friends of the opposite sex?

[Anonymous]

Yes. As for married, easier if you were friends before marriage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes. As for married, easier if you were friends before marriage.

I agree

[Anonymous]

I am a married straight guy and I have had many friends that were female. Some married and some not. From before preschool to my forties.

The big issue seems to be more with the people that can not be close friends with the opposite sex. They see a couple that become close friends and assume that a close friendship is more. They start spreading rumors.

There have been times that a female friend has made a pass or wanted more... but once you cross that line it is very hard to be close friends again. If they can't settle on just being friends and start acting strange... You have to walk away.

[Anonymous]

Friends? Sure. Close best friends? Nope. That's what a spouse is for.

[Anonymous]

Only if she is fat and ugly

[Anonymous]

Woman here, I live my female friends, but I have always had lots of guy friends-usually DH friends that I am close with too.
I love having guy friends! I also am friendly with DS friends dads (sorry don't know where to put the apostrophes in that sentence).
Guy friends are the best! I am completely not attracted to any of them (pk maybe one of them) but guy friends are so easy. You don't feel guilty if you haven't called in a while, you don't have to be understanding when they are upset, you don't have to think of a good reason to get off the phone, you just say "ok gotta go-see ya!"
Sorry, some of my girl friends have been a little needy lately, as you can probably tell

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Woman here, I live my female friends, but I have always had lots of guy friends-usually DH friends that I am close with too.
I love having guy friends! I also am friendly with DS friends dads (sorry don't know where to put the apostrophes in that sentence).
Guy friends are the best! I am completely not attracted to any of them (pk maybe one of them) but guy friends are so easy. You don't feel guilty if you haven't called in a while, you don't have to be understanding when they are upset, you don't have to think of a good reason to get off the phone, you just say "ok gotta go-see ya!"
Sorry, some of my girl friends have been a little needy lately, as you can probably tell

Are you 25?

[Anonymous]

Nope 37, am I still allowed to have friends?

[ThatSmileyFaceGuy]

They can until they get marriend and then their spouses demand that they "let that freind go"

[Anonymous]

It depends, doesn't it. I have never seen anyone have to drop a pre-marriage friend of the opposite sex. Certainly my husband and I still have those friends.

But I'm not out making individual friends with people of the same sex either. Our "new" friends now tend to be couples whose kids are friends with ours.

[Anonymous]

Only if there is NO sexual attraction on BOTH sides.

[Anonymous]

I don't think so. My husband got very close to a woman at work and it ended up basically being an emotional affair. It's a fine line. There were problems in our marriage before this happened - otherwise I do think he would not have found a new best friend. We are in marriage counseling now, we'll see what happens.

I do think you can have casual friends of the opposite sex.

[Anonymous]

I am so glad that I do not run in the segregated circles of some of the PPs. Yes, men and women can just be friends. I love my husband. We've been together for ten years and have a beautiful child together. We chose each other from all our acquaintances to make a life and grow old together. My male friends - the ones from before DH, the ones from after, the ones who are married, single, divorced, gay or straight - have nothing to do with my marriage. Some of them are attractive. Some of them are even people I have dated in the past. DH has friends who are women too. I think that the trick is to be secure in your marriage and be friends with people who are secure in theirs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am so glad that I do not run in the segregated circles of some of the PPs. Yes, men and women can just be friends. I love my husband. We've been together for ten years and have a beautiful child together. We chose each other from all our acquaintances to make a life and grow old together. My male friends - the ones from before DH, the ones from after, the ones who are married, single, divorced, gay or straight - have nothing to do with my marriage. Some of them are attractive. Some of them are even people I have dated in the past. DH has friends who are women too. I think that the trick is to be secure in your marriage and be friends with people who are secure in theirs.

In theory this sounds easy but I think it gets more complicated for some people when insecurities start to show up.