Really Irritating Child in DC's PK

[Anonymous]

Ok, I know all PK kids are probably irritating, but there is one in my DC's charter school PK class who is head and shoulders worse than others. This child is ALWAYS correcting other kids, bossing other kids, comparing himself to other kids (i.e. I'm taller, better at math, can read more, faster, etc). Teachers are too professional to complain, but it is pretty clear he irritates them too. Parents seem to encourage the hyper-competitive behavior and/or find it charming. Do I pull them aside and tell them that their kid is a PITA or just hope he outgrows it. It really does seem like they encourage the behavior rather than correct it. I think they like to have a kid who is "self confident" but I feel like they are setting him up to be friendless.

Ok, this is probably just a rant. Even if you tell me to talk to them, I probably will not have the guts.

[Anonymous]

I would stay out of it. You are not going to change them. Unfortunately, this is part of life...annoying people.

[Anonymous]

I think what I "should" do is encourage you to model correct behavior "We all have our strengths and weaknesses, etc."

But what I'd really WANT to do is say "And yet, Jimmy has more friends than you, because he's not a brat."

Hang in there. Double check with the teachers for their thoughts/advice (surely they've encountered this before). And, hope you're not in the same class next year.

[Anonymous]

Perhaps the parents don't know he acts that way. Ask the teacher if they've spoken to the parents about it.

i find so many times that kids are so different at school than at home. One of my friends has a really, really outgoing, loud, funny child, and the teacher told her that she so shy and quiet. We were like, "WHAT the what?"

[Anonymous]

We just say that "everyone is different" and leave it at that. Unless it's bullying, which is really not an appropriate term for preK, this child just can't self-regulate yet. He/she will learn through peer and adult feedback that this type of behavior doesn't work. If the child doesn't learn due to an SN issue, then professionals should be brought in at later grades.

Other PPs are right; annoying people are part of life and learning to cope gracefully is a life skill that you can teach your own child.

[Anonymous]

My DC had a friend like that. Playdates turned in to immediate fights. My kid would say hello, other kid would say "I'm taller than you" my kid says "no you're not", next thing you know, punches getting thrown over who is taller, older, faster. Don't have as many playdates with that pal anymore.

No real advice, just sympathy OP.

I kind of like the "brat" advice above . But, its almost like brat is the wrong word. Is it ok to call a 5 year old a "dick". Guess not.

[Anonymous]

Use simple language and stay factual.
If he starts bragging in front of you, especially if the parents are within earshot, gently say: "You hurt people's feelings when you say you are better than them." If the child doesn't understand, and he probably won't at first, at least the parents will get the message that this behavior is not acceptable.

[Anonymous]

Ugh. I met up with a girl like that in the Building Museum last week. She was 5 and was building with blocks. She had built a really high tower and my 2 year old was struggling with her little structure. The 5 year old said "mine is better than yours" and kept saying it to my daughter.

Her mother said "your right Janey! Yours is!"

Finally, some older kid knocked Janey's tower down. I laughed on the inside.

[Anonymous]

Do I pull them aside and tell them that their kid is a PITA

Are you serious?! I'm sure that your unsolicited opinion of their child would be welecomed

This is PreK - don't get too involved in how other people's kids act. Focus on parenting your own child.

[Anonymous]

Pull the kid aside, push him into a locker and tell him he ain't all that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ugh. I met up with a girl like that in the Building Museum last week. She was 5 and was building with blocks. She had built a really high tower and my 2 year old was struggling with her little structure. The 5 year old said "mine is better than yours" and kept saying it to my daughter.

Her mother said "your right Janey! Yours is!"

Finally, some older kid knocked Janey's tower down. I laughed on the inside.

I would have bust out LAUGHING IN THE KID'S FACE AND THEN DONE A VICTORY LAP AROUND THE KNOCKED DOWN TOWER. HOW YOU LIKE ME NOW, JANEY?!

[Anonymous]

"He/she will learn through peer and adult feedback that this type of behavior doesn't work."

I agree - the kid is going to be the least liked child in the class soon if not already, and will either learn to shut up in order to have friends or will be shunned because the others find her obnoxious.

[Anonymous]

14:21 will you be my friend?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ugh. I met up with a girl like that in the Building Museum last week. She was 5 and was building with blocks. She had built a really high tower and my 2 year old was struggling with her little structure. The 5 year old said "mine is better than yours" and kept saying it to my daughter.

Her mother said "your right Janey! Yours is!"

Finally, some older kid knocked Janey's tower down. I laughed on the inside.

In scenarios like this, when an older kid is inflicting this on a younger one, I always say, "Of course it is, you are older."

[Anonymous]

My 7 year old son and his friends will compare their abilities a lot. Like, "You are really fast and good at reading, but I'm better at math." It doesn't lead to fights. It drives my SIL crazy - I think it makes her insecure about her really great kid. She says, "Let's all stop bragging about ourselves and talk about other things" even though the kids aren't fighting at all.