Is a bigger sized class possibly better for an only child?

[Anonymous]

Our DC is an only child. As such, every little thing he does commands so much attention from us. I sometimes think it would be good for him if he got lost in the mix a little.

Should we consider a school (public or private) with more kids so that there isn't the constant scrutiny?

I'd be curious to know what other parents of only chilren think -- or what those of you who were only children think.

[Anonymous]

I have an only child, and I think school itself was an adjustment. I don't know if the scrunity factor amounts to anything once you are not an "only" (simply being in a classrom means the attention level on one child has decreased dramatically)...so I certainly would be picking the school for the learning atmosphere, teachers, classmates, and not just for sheer numbers. All the research indicates that smaller numbers are better for younger children, and I would certainly not go against the research as a means to compensate for being an only child.

[Anonymous]

"ALL the research says". . . is a silly thing to say, sorry. It really depends on child, circumstances, etc. I was an only child and I went to excellent public schools. My class sizes were about 20 but sometimes larger. I really enjoyed school. My mom would say she couldn't wait for the end of the summer because I was so anxious to get back to school and my friends. I continue to thrive in an environment where I meet a lot of new people. I am an extrovert to be sure, and being an only child was at times lonely for me. Thankfully, I had a lot of friends at school. More importantly though, I had times when I switched groups of friends and a larger environment allowed me to play in different crowds/groups. This was critical for my development and I think played a huge part in the person I am today. I would say it is not for everyone, but it can be a very good thing for an only child to go to a bigger school.

[Anonymous]

I also was an only and don't think that should be your determining factor in what kind of school your child goes to. I, like the above poster, was an extrovert and the size of the group didn't change that. I went to small in-home daycares, a fairly large public school for elementary and middle, and then a large parochial HS. After that, I chose a smaller private college (3600 students, slightly more than my HS) because it seemed a good fit.

I think you need to see what kind of child your little one turns out to be and then take it from there. Personality, not family size, should be the biggest factor in picking the best fit for any child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"ALL the research says". . . is a silly thing to say, sorry. It really depends on child, circumstances, etc. I was an only child and I went to excellent public schools. My class sizes were about 20 but sometimes larger. I really enjoyed school. My mom would say she couldn't wait for the end of the summer because I was so anxious to get back to school and my friends. I continue to thrive in an environment where I meet a lot of new people. I am an extrovert to be sure, and being an only child was at times lonely for me. Thankfully, I had a lot of friends at school. More importantly though, I had times when I switched groups of friends and a larger environment allowed me to play in different crowds/groups. This was critical for my development and I think played a huge part in the person I am today. I would say it is not for everyone, but it can be a very good thing for an only child to go to a bigger school.

Can you please tell me the evidence to suggest that large class sizes, say 25 or 30 in a class, is better for younger children? I do think the PP is correct that in elementary education (which is what I take younger children to mean), smaller class sizes are better...I wouldn't read too much more into that.

[Anonymous]

OP here: Thanks for the responses. I'm going to try my best to match the school to my child's personality. At this stage (pre-K), it's really hard to know. This fall, DC will attend a really top-rate program, so if a bigger class isn't necessarily better for him, then we'll just hope that this school works out.