Do you secretly judge parents by their strollers??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's interesting how so many PPs claim that the people with expensive things are not actually the people with money. That may be true in some circumstances, but I think it's the exception rather than the rule. In any case, how would you know the financial circumstances of the strangers you see in the street, or even your friends? Why does it make people feel better to think that they are being sensible and have their priorities straight rather than just accepting that some others have more and it's not a crime to show it?

This reminds me a lot of the thread a few months where lots of people were posting things about people who had expensive weddings and ended up divorced. For some reason we find it hard to accept that someone else can have more money and be open about it and still be a balanced, happy human being.

Before the flames come let me say that I've got a nondescript mid-range stroller from a brand nobody's ever heard of.

I think it's the rule, rather than the exception. This is why credit card debt is so rampant in our country.

For more info on this subject, read "The Millionaire Next Door" - it explains how smart rich people really spend their money. They are more likely to be driving Hondas than BMWs, and to use Gracos rather than Bugaboos.

You are absolutely right about credit card debt and people living beyond their means. But it doesn't logically follow to then say that the majority of people with expensive strollers can't afford them. (Whether or not they are "smart" is a different question.) Most fancy-stroller-owners I know fall into the category of people for whom $900 is not pocket change but also isn't a totally irresponsible splurge. But the fact is you can't make any judgments about someone's circumstances based on one purchase.

What does "afford" really mean anyway? It's not like a Bugaboo is $500K. Almost anyone with a steady white-collar job can probably afford to pay $900 for a stroller if they're willing to be frugal in other areas. Lots of people spend $5 a day at Starbucks and don't get judged for it even though that same $5 in the piggy bank everyday could add up to a Bugaboo in 6 months.

In any case, my comment was more about the way that we automatically have to assume that someone who has something more expensive must automatically have some other deficiency in their life--they're stupid, or in debt up their eyeballs, or have a bratty obese kid. But in reality one thing has nothing to do with the other and if you think it does, that's only because it helps you feel better about your own circumstances. The people who make negative judgments about someone based on an expensive stroller (like the person who could "never be friends with someone who had a Bugaboo") are obviously very focused on money and what it means. They'd never admit it but I bet they would be be the first ones lined up at the Bugaboo store when the lottery check came in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone in my whole entire neighborhood has a Bugaboo. I'm not kidding!

Especially red ones.

(My kids, thankfully, are too old for strollers.)

Where do you live? I would guess in DC and not in Ashburn. The exurbanites seem to have the SUV of strollers.

Georgetown. And I am not exaggerating. I hardly know one person without a Bugaboo. Some people have multiple strollers, so they'll have a Double Baby Jogger or something similar in addition to the Bugaboo.

Until I read this thread, I had subconsciously assumed that everyone in America had a Bugaboo!!!

If I was a stroller thief I would be hanging out in Georgetown.

As an American living in Georgetown-- I will defend my former 'hood! It is true the majority of moms over there had bugaboos....but it is also true that the vast majority of my mom friends over there were European. They walk everywhere. They walked everywhere in their hometowns/cities, etc. A good majority of them don't even own cars. They invest in the stroller as if it is their car because it essentially is their car.

I went through 3 Metrolites in the 3 years I lived in Georgetown...cobblestone, brick, tree branches jutting out of sidewalks. The bugaboos were great over that and they had the wonderful bassinet for the newborns. I used to knock them, but living that lifestyle I could see why they were popular. There is not the same need if you are on suburban sidewalks only a few minutes everyday and inside Tysons Mall.

I, personally, stuck with the Metrolite because I have yet to find a BETTER BASKET..in any other stroller on the market. I could fit 3 full WholeFoods safeway bags and a 1.5 liter bottle of water underneath. My BOB jogger that I used to run on the C&O trail couldn't fit one.

[Anonymous]

I just sent this thread to my sister on the west coast, who couldn't stop rolling on the floor with laughter over the amount of time people have seriously spent on this. Then she cried, realizing I have to live here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I will say that most people I know who bought a stroller over $500 are people who spend all of their disposible income or are in debt. They're not contributing to retirement in a significant way, they don't have a big savings cushion, etc.

How do you know how much they make? Are people really this open about income and debt? I have found people think we are broke but really we make more money than they do.

As a side note: I have a Maclarens and a Phil & Ted double. I use them everyday depending on my youngest's (18 months) preference since she is difficult these days. I use them more than my car. I don't care if people think I am wasteful. Or have an issue with my 3 year old riding in it (he actually looks 5! and I get dirty looks all the time). In fact, I welcome the help! You can watch my kids while I go do errands. I will admit both are pretty dirty and you can totally judge me on that! I find them gross too! People really have a lot of time on their hands if they are debating stroller brands.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm curious, are you judging me? I have a Phil and Ted Sport with a doubles kit/jump seat. I have a 2 old and an infant and bought it when I was pregnant. I love it. Before that I had an Inglesina Zippy for #1. I think they were both moderately priced and not too flashy.

I think of P&T as a middle-class workhorse kind of stroller. I live on Capitol Hill and there are tons of them, usually pushed by moms wearing LL Bean type clothes and Danskos. (Not that there's anything wrong with that.)

You don't think BOBs fall into the same category? I usually see granola types or "hip" types pushing them around. . .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's interesting how so many PPs claim that the people with expensive things are not actually the people with money. That may be true in some circumstances, but I think it's the exception rather than the rule. In any case, how would you know the financial circumstances of the strangers you see in the street, or even your friends? Why does it make people feel better to think that they are being sensible and have their priorities straight rather than just accepting that some others have more and it's not a crime to show it?

This reminds me a lot of the thread a few months where lots of people were posting things about people who had expensive weddings and ended up divorced. For some reason we find it hard to accept that someone else can have more money and be open about it and still be a balanced, happy human being.

Before the flames come let me say that I've got a nondescript mid-range stroller from a brand nobody's ever heard of.

I think it's the rule, rather than the exception. This is why credit card debt is so rampant in our country.

For more info on this subject, read "The Millionaire Next Door" - it explains how smart rich people really spend their money. They are more likely to be driving Hondas than BMWs, and to use Gracos rather than Bugaboos.

You are absolutely right about credit card debt and people living beyond their means. But it doesn't logically follow to then say that the majority of people with expensive strollers can't afford them. (Whether or not they are "smart" is a different question.) Most fancy-stroller-owners I know fall into the category of people for whom $900 is not pocket change but also isn't a totally irresponsible splurge. But the fact is you can't make any judgments about someone's circumstances based on one purchase.

What does "afford" really mean anyway? It's not like a Bugaboo is $500K. Almost anyone with a steady white-collar job can probably afford to pay $900 for a stroller if they're willing to be frugal in other areas. Lots of people spend $5 a day at Starbucks and don't get judged for it even though that same $5 in the piggy bank everyday could add up to a Bugaboo in 6 months.

In any case, my comment was more about the way that we automatically have to assume that someone who has something more expensive must automatically have some other deficiency in their life--they're stupid, or in debt up their eyeballs, or have a bratty obese kid. But in reality one thing has nothing to do with the other and if you think it does, that's only because it helps you feel better about your own circumstances. The people who make negative judgments about someone based on an expensive stroller (like the person who could "never be friends with someone who had a Bugaboo") are obviously very focused on money and what it means. They'd never admit it but I bet they would be be the first ones lined up at the Bugaboo store when the lottery check came in.

\
The voice of reason. Can we be friends?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will say that most people I know who bought a stroller over $500 are people who spend all of their disposible income or are in debt. They're not contributing to retirement in a significant way, they don't have a big savings cushion, etc.

How do you know how much they make? Are people really this open about income and debt? I have found people think we are broke but really we make more money than they do.

As a side note: I have a Maclarens and a Phil & Ted double. I use them everyday depending on my youngest's (18 months) preference since she is difficult these days. I use them more than my car. I don't care if people think I am wasteful. Or have an issue with my 3 year old riding in it (he actually looks 5! and I get dirty looks all the time). In fact, I welcome the help! You can watch my kids while I go do errands. I will admit both are pretty dirty and you can totally judge me on that! I find them gross too! People really have a lot of time on their hands if they are debating stroller brands.

I'm the PP you quoted. Yes, I'm talking about people whom I know well and have these strollers; I can't comment on those I see at Costco or at the park or whatever. I just happen to know that the 4 people close to me who bought really expensive strollers are not the best with their money. You mention high income--it's not necessarily about income. The folks I'm talking about are definitely "high income". 3/4 don't have consumer debt but pretty much spend everything they make. They maxed the house, they drive pretty expensive cars. One example is DH's cousin and wife. They make good salaries and have a large home. Between childcare costs, mortgage and their other expenses, they're pretty much not saving anything. We've talked about it. The expensive stroller is just one of the many things they just had to have. They love the stroller (to the extent that one can love a stroller).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is a $600+ stroller needed for "urban streets". Are there strollers out there that can't handle sidewalks?

Have you walked in DC lately? Uneven bricks, tree root eruptions, old curb stones with no wheelchair cut: it's bad for just walking! The metro are just as bad; I hate getting stuck in the gap at the platform with one of those little wobbly plastic wheels. Maybe in the better parts of town they have wide, newly-paved sidewalks, and if you never take Metro then you'd be great. But not so in many areas.

I assume from your response that you are living in an expensive area of DC. Given that the majority of the city lives below the poverty line how do you think these people manage to stroll their little ones around the same uneven bricks?

[Anonymous]

I'm laughing out loud that this thread has now surpassed (in length) even most of the threads on extended breastfeeding and WOH versus SAH!

Signed, a mom who pushes around an apparently wannabe status symbol that was picked out by her Honda-driving DH because it had all the features we wanted and is made by a mom and pop company.

[Anonymous]

11:56, sorry you couldn't get a job interview on your merits.

[Anonymous]

12:31 it's stupid to spend $5 a day on Starbucks too.

[Anonymous]

12:48, if you're really close to people, yes, you know if they are in debt or have a high net worth. I don't know numbers, but when you see people sell their $800,000 houses and build one for $1.7 million, and the wife quit her job, yeah, I think they're doing fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:11:56, sorry you couldn't get a job interview on your merits.

you're just jealous because you have to apply and be in corporate setting to cause a good impression.

[Anonymous]

No.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone in my whole entire neighborhood has a Bugaboo. I'm not kidding!

Especially red ones.

(My kids, thankfully, are too old for strollers.)

Where do you live? I would guess in DC and not in Ashburn. The exurbanites seem to have the SUV of strollers.

Georgetown. And I am not exaggerating. I hardly know one person without a Bugaboo. Some people have multiple strollers, so they'll have a Double Baby Jogger or something similar in addition to the Bugaboo.

Until I read this thread, I had subconsciously assumed that everyone in America had a Bugaboo!!!

If I was a stroller thief I would be hanging out in Georgetown.

As an American living in Georgetown-- I will defend my former 'hood! It is true the majority of moms over there had bugaboos....but it is also true that the vast majority of my mom friends over there were European. They walk everywhere. They walked everywhere in their hometowns/cities, etc. A good majority of them don't even own cars. They invest in the stroller as if it is their car because it essentially is their car.

I went through 3 Metrolites in the 3 years I lived in Georgetown...cobblestone, brick, tree branches jutting out of sidewalks. The bugaboos were great over that and they had the wonderful bassinet for the newborns. I used to knock them, but living that lifestyle I could see why they were popular. There is not the same need if you are on suburban sidewalks only a few minutes everyday and inside Tysons Mall.

I, personally, stuck with the Metrolite because I have yet to find a BETTER BASKET..in any other stroller on the market. I could fit 3 full WholeFoods safeway bags and a 1.5 liter bottle of water underneath. My BOB jogger that I used to run on the C&O trail couldn't fit one.

You should check out the UPPA