How Much Do a Kid's Looks Factor Into Admissions Decisions?

[Anonymous]

OP, looks (yours and your kid's) will be a factor, at least subconsciously.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Research shows that people are more likely to think beautiful people are smart and talented. Why wouldn't we make those assumptions about children as well?

I wonder if that is true for both men and women. I think beautiful women are assumed to be less intelligent. But I digress....

My MIL is a child psychologist. She told us that studies have shown that attractive infants get more attention than unattractive infants. Adults (parents, caregivers, strangers) and other children are more likely to smile at them and try to engage them. And this attention helps the babies develop both mentally and emotionally. There are some fairly universal markers of a baby being attractive. Large wide-set eyes being the one that I remember (and true for most mammals, not just humans). It is heart-breaking to think that some kids are at a disadvantage from day one just because of how they look. It doesn't fit with our democratic ideals of being a meritocracy.

Extrapolating from this discrepancy in the treatment of infants, it is very possible that the people evaluating the play dates subconsciously focus more on the attractive kids than the less attractive kids.

hmm. On the beauty feedback loop. Son absolutely gorgeous and not introverted, but also very low social needs so not much of a desire to interact with grownups or even other kids (he's 4). He does his own thing - often loudly and cutely. He is amazing loooking, but, overall, he doesn't get as much attention as my non-gorgoeus daughter because he pretty much ignores any attention he gets.

Daughter is 14 months and cute enough, but nothing like her brother (I do think this is mainly the eyes - he has huge wideset eyes and she has normal-sized, narrow-set eyes). But OMG is she social, waving and flirting snd saying hi and smiling. She gets WAY more attention than him.

At admissions, I think a normal looking personable kid (daughter) would trump a goregous but not terrible personable kid (son). It does seem to be how it works in the real world.

[Anonymous]

I thought this was a bs thread until I attended back to school night at a Big 3 school. Lots of very attractive people. I went to the gym, picked up a few new outfits, and picked up more Botox the next day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, looks (yours and your kid's) will be a factor, at least subconsciously.

Life is unfair.

[Anonymous]

I honestly don't see that many gorgeous children all around town as people are claiming in this thread. Cute kids, sure, but gorgeous/stunning/eye-catching? Nope.

[Anonymous]

I just realized that the only way to refute this thread is to have people posting, "No way! My kid's class has tons of ugly kids in it!" Which seems unlikely to happen.

[Anonymous]

I have attractive kids- often told how beautiful my daughter is. Not sure it mattered for admission though, I certainky see all types. As an attractive woman the reality is, it can cut both ways. I've often felt I had to work harder to prove I was intelligent.

[Anonymous]

My child preschool classmates were all bigeyes children. My daughter was the only admit with normal eyes and we had letters from 5 board members

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have attractive kids- often told how beautiful my daughter is. Not sure it mattered for admission though, I certainky see all types. As an attractive woman the reality is, it can cut both ways. I've often felt I had to work harder to prove I was intelligent.

This. Oddly enough, I have my DS dress down and allow him to be disheveled because he is such a good looking kid. Afraid he'll be looked down upon.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, looks (yours and your kid's) will be a factor, at least subconsciously.

Life is unfair.

Why did you resurrect a thread started in 2010?

[Anonymous]

I am sure looks matter. I am also sure that good grooming matter too.

I had heard the daycare providers in my DC's daycare (when he was a toddler) discuss how some kids smelled great and some smelled gross, and that they never wanted to hold the stinky kids. I never forgot that.

After that I made sure that my kids clothes smelled good and they were bathed and smelled like baby lotion. In fact I even rubbed a small amount of baby lotion on their hair too!

I used to rub fabric softener sheet on their clothes to prevent static in winter and that also made them smell very good.

My kids shower everyday. Their clothes are clean and ironed for school. They use deodorants. Their backpacks, Jackets, shoes are routinely washed, so that they do not look grimy and yucky. I know that people around them are looking at them and subconsciously liking them more if they are good looking and that they are well groomed. It is but natural, is it not?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I just realized that the only way to refute this thread is to have people posting, "No way! My kid's class has tons of ugly kids in it!" Which seems unlikely to happen.

Happens all the time around dcum

[Anonymous]

My kids are both professional models. I didn't tell the ADs that, but they are beautiful children. Hope that helps us.

[Anonymous]

I would imagine the looks of the child matter much less when applying for high school. And I would imagine the looks of the parents matter even less once a child has a proven track record and a fully developed personality.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We had an AD tell us that including a photo with our application helps their office to remember the children they've met. The AD said it was optional, but extremely helpful, especially if they meet you in the fall but don't make their decisions until February.

Do you think this is true, or is there an alterior motive