Expats

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just watched the most recent episode, centered on the "helpers." Really powerful writing and cinematography. This is turning out to be one of the best series I've watched in a long time.

+1, I have not loved the season prior to this but knew this episode was coming based on reviews and am glad I hung on. It was beautifully shot and I loved the performances. Even though I could anticipate what was going to happen with both Puri and Essie at the end of the episode, I still felt such anger on their behalf. Especially Puri, as Hilary is such a manipulative user.

Margaret's total obliviousness to Essie's actual situation is also enraging but it's harder to get angry with her because she's understandably not thinking clearly because of Gus. Still, it was hard to think Essie might actually take her up on this plan to immigrate to the US out of concern for the family and especially the kids she's helped raise. It really highlights the difficulty of a job like this where you are an employee but everyone acts like you are "part of the family" (a very low status part of the family who must always be working, but an essential part of the family nonetheless).

I've heard so many people describe their nannies as "like family," I'm curious how people are responding to the Essie storyline. Do you ever wonder if you are creating unhealthy boundaries in the same way? I would wonder about this.

DP. Can you elaborate on the bolded? I thought Hilary was very kind to Puri - even if she was also drunk. How was she cruel to her?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just watched the most recent episode, centered on the "helpers." Really powerful writing and cinematography. This is turning out to be one of the best series I've watched in a long time.

+1, I have not loved the season prior to this but knew this episode was coming based on reviews and am glad I hung on. It was beautifully shot and I loved the performances. Even though I could anticipate what was going to happen with both Puri and Essie at the end of the episode, I still felt such anger on their behalf. Especially Puri, as Hilary is such a manipulative user.

Margaret's total obliviousness to Essie's actual situation is also enraging but it's harder to get angry with her because she's understandably not thinking clearly because of Gus. Still, it was hard to think Essie might actually take her up on this plan to immigrate to the US out of concern for the family and especially the kids she's helped raise. It really highlights the difficulty of a job like this where you are an employee but everyone acts like you are "part of the family" (a very low status part of the family who must always be working, but an essential part of the family nonetheless).

I've heard so many people describe their nannies as "like family," I'm curious how people are responding to the Essie storyline. Do you ever wonder if you are creating unhealthy boundaries in the same way? I would wonder about this.

DP. Can you elaborate on the bolded? I thought Hilary was very kind to Puri - even if she was also drunk. How was she cruel to her?

PP here - sorry, I just realized I haven't finished the entire episode (so long!) so I probably will figure this out on my own. Disregard!

[Anonymous]

I don’t understand why Puri didn’t simply make Hilary’s breakfast and then say “I’m on my way now.” Or not even make the breakfast and just remind Hilary of the competition. Good grief.

And Mercy’s new friend/girlfriend - what is her connection to the older woman and her son? Is she the daughter/sister?

Was this the final episode?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just watched the most recent episode, centered on the "helpers." Really powerful writing and cinematography. This is turning out to be one of the best series I've watched in a long time.

+1, I have not loved the season prior to this but knew this episode was coming based on reviews and am glad I hung on. It was beautifully shot and I loved the performances. Even though I could anticipate what was going to happen with both Puri and Essie at the end of the episode, I still felt such anger on their behalf. Especially Puri, as Hilary is such a manipulative user.

Margaret's total obliviousness to Essie's actual situation is also enraging but it's harder to get angry with her because she's understandably not thinking clearly because of Gus. Still, it was hard to think Essie might actually take her up on this plan to immigrate to the US out of concern for the family and especially the kids she's helped raise. It really highlights the difficulty of a job like this where you are an employee but everyone acts like you are "part of the family" (a very low status part of the family who must always be working, but an essential part of the family nonetheless).

I've heard so many people describe their nannies as "like family," I'm curious how people are responding to the Essie storyline. Do you ever wonder if you are creating unhealthy boundaries in the same way? I would wonder about this.

DP. Can you elaborate on the bolded? I thought Hilary was very kind to Puri - even if she was also drunk. How was she cruel to her?

Even before the end, her behavior is cruel. She forces Puri to stay and watch her fight with David, and then brings up Puri in the fight, as evidence of David just wanting to be taken care of by someone who demands nothing in return. Hilary is also ridiculous in that fight, claiming she does everything at home but obviously Puri does (which is why Puri us there, of course, but it's still ridiculous for Hilary to claim this when Puri is right there).

But then even after this awkwardness and bringing Puri into the fight, she has Puri come and drink with her because she doesn't want to drink alone. And she doesn't ask-- she hands Puri a glass of wine and demands it. The deal with the helpers is they have somewhat amorphous jobs. They aren't maids, nannies, or assistants. Their job is simply to help. So in that moment, Puri can't say "actually Hilary, while I'm happy to make you some food or do laundry, I don't feel comfortable drinking/socializing with you." She has to do it.

And then even when they are hanging out, it's not comfortable because Hilary knows Puri is not her equal. Puri didn't suggest any of the things they did -- Hilary insisted, and Puri's job is to be grateful. Hilary looked like she was having a manic episode. It wasn't kindness, it was very self-focused.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand why Puri didn’t simply make Hilary’s breakfast and then say “I’m on my way now.” Or not even make the breakfast and just remind Hilary of the competition. Good grief.

And Mercy’s new friend/girlfriend - what is her connection to the older woman and her son? Is she the daughter/sister?

Was this the final episode?

I think Puri was nervous about a conflict. She doesn't want to appear too demanding. Also Hilary seems unstable at the moment.

Mercy's friend is a classmate/friend of the guy who was going to the protests. No she is not his sister-- we see her in her own home with her family at one point. They have a conversation about an exam coming up and studying.

No, there is one episode left.

[Anonymous]

What’s Hilary going to live on? She doesn’t talk to her Dad and doesn’t do shit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What’s Hilary going to live on? She doesn’t talk to her Dad and doesn’t do shit.

Hilary has her own high paying career. She mentions to her friend at lunch that she doesn't need to milk David's affair for jewelry or other things because she can buy those herself.

She seems to work in fashion or advertising in a stylist or similar role-- we see her on a photo shoot earlier in the season. And she and her mom argue about this too-- Hilary talks about how her parents pressured her to become professionally very successful, and she did, and now her mom is pressuring her to give that up to be a mom.

Actually from what we've seen from David, Hilary is the more successful one, as she actually goes to work. He just goes to bars and his mistresses apartment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s Hilary going to live on? She doesn’t talk to her Dad and doesn’t do shit.

Hilary has her own high paying career. She mentions to her friend at lunch that she doesn't need to milk David's affair for jewelry or other things because she can buy those herself.

She seems to work in fashion or advertising in a stylist or similar role-- we see her on a photo shoot earlier in the season. And she and her mom argue about this too-- Hilary talks about how her parents pressured her to become professionally very successful, and she did, and now her mom is pressuring her to give that up to be a mom.

Actually from what we've seen from David, Hilary is the more successful one, as she actually goes to work. He just goes to bars and his mistresses apartment.

Thanks for this- is Hilary's job why they are expats maybe? Fascinating twist to the norm.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s Hilary going to live on? She doesn’t talk to her Dad and doesn’t do shit.

Hilary has her own high paying career. She mentions to her friend at lunch that she doesn't need to milk David's affair for jewelry or other things because she can buy those herself.

She seems to work in fashion or advertising in a stylist or similar role-- we see her on a photo shoot earlier in the season. And she and her mom argue about this too-- Hilary talks about how her parents pressured her to become professionally very successful, and she did, and now her mom is pressuring her to give that up to be a mom.

Actually from what we've seen from David, Hilary is the more successful one, as she actually goes to work. He just goes to bars and his mistresses apartment.

Thanks for this- is Hilary's job why they are expats maybe? Fascinating twist to the norm.

In the book Hilary was an heiress. David had a high powered law job but they lived better than his boss thanks to her money, and she had a prenup. She also did not work, had given up her pr job.

[Anonymous]

Hillary is a walking cultural stereotype.

[Anonymous]

How about the fact that Puri lied to Hilary's friend when interviewing for her next job?

Underscores that the expats may think that their help is "like family", but they actually don't know them at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand why Puri didn’t simply make Hilary’s breakfast and then say “I’m on my way now.” Or not even make the breakfast and just remind Hilary of the competition. Good grief.

And Mercy’s new friend/girlfriend - what is her connection to the older woman and her son? Is she the daughter/sister?

Was this the final episode?

I think Puri was nervous about a conflict. She doesn't want to appear too demanding. Also Hilary seems unstable at the moment.

Mercy's friend is a classmate/friend of the guy who was going to the protests. No she is not his sister-- we see her in her own home with her family at one point. They have a conversation about an exam coming up and studying.

No, there is one episode left.

Thanks for all the answers!
-PP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How about the fact that Puri lied to Hilary's friend when interviewing for her next job?

Underscores that the expats may think that their help is "like family", but they actually don't know them at all.

Wait, what scene was this?

[Anonymous]

Anyone notice that Hilary only wears cream-colored outfits? Everything looks exactly the same.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How about the fact that Puri lied to Hilary's friend when interviewing for her next job?

Underscores that the expats may think that their help is "like family", but they actually don't know them at all.

Oh wow, I'm sorry but no -- that wasn't Puri. That was another woman interviewing for the other job. Puri is still with Hilary.