Working vs. SAHM in southern MoCo?

[Anonymous]

I am a working mom and our family is considering moving from NWDC to MoCo - Potomac, North Potomac or North Bethesda. Despite the list of 'hoods we are trying to find a smaller, older home or townhome in these neighborhoods because we are concerned about the economy and want to be conservative but still close to beltway and in good schools. One thing on my mind is - will I feel out of place among a community of mostly SAHM or working moms w/live in nannies or au pairs? We are a very average family with 2 working parents and we rely on aftercare programs because we just dont have the budget for nannies. I also have a biased belief that being among friends, getting some homework time, and playing outdoors is perhaps preferrable to having a nanny pickup and then hang out at home until parents arrive home at 6pm, but I digress.

In general, what is the working vs. SAHM mom atmosphere in the Churchill, Wootton and Walter Johnson clusters?

TIA

[Anonymous]

There are plenty of both SAHM and WOHM. I would move where you want to move and not worry about it. It will be fine.

[Anonymous]

I would not worry about it. You will be judged and criticized not matter what.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't worry about it. We are in the Whitman district and I work and my kids were in daycare/aftercare when they were younger. I never felt like that was an odd choice to be making.

[Anonymous]

I don't think working versus SAHM will be an issue but realize lots of people seem to have flexibility in their schedules where they may work at home some days, work part-time, work an alternative schedule or hours, or have family in the area plus you have either nannies or sitters that watch the kids after school so there may not be as many kids as you would think using aftercare despite many dual income families. It also makes it difficult to take advantage of any after school programming like hands on science if you don't have anyone to pick up your child by 4:15.

Since you know you plan on aftercare you should include looking at aftercare as part of your school search. Not every elementary school offers aftercare on site. You may not be thrilled with either the program on site at your school (if offered) or the programs that bus to your elementary school. Also you may want to factor in what enrichments are offered. For example if it is important to you to have your child in ballet for example would you want to see if the location for aftercare has the opportunity to sign up for ballet (at additional cost) saving you from one activity during the weekend. For us, since eating dinner, getting homework done, baths and family time are all lucky if we finish by 8:30, it isn't realistic to do an activity during the week not offered at aftercare unless it is Friday.

[Anonymous]

Hi - we live in North Potomac and both work, and our daughters attend Bar-T for aftercare. (We feed into Quince Orchard but many of our friends' families feed into Wooton.) I don't think you will feel out of place - we know a lot of families in the same situation. We LOVE Bar-T and our kids have made a lot of close friends there and have great relationships with the staff. They also enjoy seeing a lot of the same kids and counselors at Bar-T camp over the summer. There are a ton of stay-at-home moms at our school - mostly I appreciate their involvement and all of the energy they bring to the neighborhood and PTA. Our one big challenge is that so many of the activities, PTA meetings, etc., are structured to fit the schedules of stay-at-home parents. Also, sometimes it feels like all of their kids have been in play groups together since they were 3 months old, so I feel like my daughters had to work a little harder to find friends, and it's more challenging for me to set up playdates, etc. But... I guess those are minor challenges, and we otherwise LOVE this area. The parks, schools, available activities, restaurants, etc., are really hard to beat for families.

[Anonymous]

OP here! Thanks for the feedback, much appreciated. I did start looking at aftercare as we narrowed down to neighborhoods and went as far as calling programs to gauge the likelihood they will have spots available mid-semester since we probably wont move into the 'hood until November.

I hear you 14:36, those are common challenges I feel now, my heart just sinks everytime my DS asks for a playdate w/a friend that I know I cant facilitate and I wont be able to reciprocate w/that SAHM if they host us.

[Anonymous]

Offer sleepovers instead!