lesbian couple

[Anonymous]

My partner and I want to carry each other's babies, but no fertility clinic will help us. Why are they so prejudiced against same sex couples?

[Anonymous]

Shady Grove won't do this? I know they've done two men with the sister of one being the egg donor and "surrogate" so to speak, carrying the baby of her brother's partner, I wonder why you are finding such resistance? Where have you been?

[Anonymous]

We tried SG and they said it was not medically necessary to do IVF and transfer embryo to my partner so they said IUI was our only option.

[Anonymous]

I say this is a fake post from a troll. A "real" lesbian couple wouldn't be so idiotic to say sweepingly (and idiotically) that this is discriminatory and would have posted a more thoughtful post with a real question about their dilemma.

Disclosure: Lesbian poster here.

[Anonymous]

PP here. Ok maybe it is a real lesbian couple! But seriously, OP, why on earth would you post that this is prejudiced of them. Um if a straight woman came in and said here is my best friend and I'd like to do this same thing, they'd say uh no also I am sure.

[Anonymous]

I want my partner to carry my child and NO fertility clinic will do it...WHY???

[Anonymous]

That is very interesting if it is true. My fiance and I were just talking about this the other day. Do you want your partner to carry your child for legal reasons in case of a break up? Sorry if that question is offensive but I am genuinely curious, have a gay parent, and am very pro gay parenting in general. Why not carry your own child/egg to term and have her do the same? Would that not be possible to do at SG?
In truth, it ISNT medically necessary but I think I do understand why a lesbian couple would choose this in case of a break up if that is your reasoning. Keep in mind though that gay men do not have this option and although they can have multiple children who are biologically connected to both of them, it still would get complicated in the wrong hands with a bad break up. I have many friends who are gay in this situation and I have never asked them what if anything they have done to protect their legal rights as parents. I dont think it is my place to ask them this even though it has occurred to me - I am just happy for them and wish them the best never knowing what the biological connections to the children are. But I imagine all of this is very thought through. I do have a gay client who divulged to me that their plan was to use his sperm with his partner's cousin so that they were both connected. They are still TTC...
Good luck finding the right place and situation for you and yours.

[Anonymous]

It's not how I formed my family, but I can sort of understand it. It's the closest thing that a lesbian couple can do to create a child together. Some people just really think it's important to create children together. Hetro couples do it all the time and no one questions them as to why they want to create a child together.

[Anonymous]

PP here. And I had never thought of it that way. It makes perfect sense.

[Anonymous]

I would say don't let the biological stuff get in the way of having a family. There are plenty of people on this board who have used donor eggs and donor sperm and they do not have a child that is biologically related to their partner, themselves, or either of them. I can sort of understand the desire to have a child "with your partner" (I certain thought this mattered until it wasn't possible and then I moved on) but you might want to broaden your definition of what "with your partner" means.

[Anonymous]

Happened upon this post when looking for something else, and thought it was worthwhile to respond (even months later) to say that this is exactly the TTC scenario my partner and I are exploring right now and we've had no problem finding fertility clinics who are willing to do it. We've talked with doctors at CFA (one who we've already done half a years' worth of IUIs with) and at SG and haven't confronted any sort of discrimination. I guess that could change when it becomes our real plan rather than a hypotethetical, but it seems doubtful.

[Anonymous]

Clinics have guidelines as to age, weight, etc. But other than that, I'm sure they would take a couple's money. I call troll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We tried SG and they said it was not medically necessary to do IVF and transfer embryo to my partner so they said IUI was our only option.

Were they taking about insurance issues? Our IUI cycles were covered by insurance, but the IVF is not because we are using a donor and surrogate.

[Anonymous]

are you married? oh wait LOL