Sound off - Ivy grads & high income earners who chose public schools over privates

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What exactly is the point of this thread?

OP here. The point of the thread is exactly what I stated in my original post.

On another thread, someone suggested that most Ivy grads and high-income families choose private schools, so there aren't many of those in area public schools. I don't think that's correct. I know several people who have high HHIs and who went to top colleges, but have chosen public schools for their children. But maybe my circle of friends is just abnormal in that respect. Aren't there lots of other people like that?

Based on my personal experience, it struck me as inaccurate for someone to claim that parents with high HHI and/or alumni of top colleges most often choose private schools. I personally know many people in those categories who chose public schools. But because my personal experience is limited to only the people I know, I wanted to get a sense of what other people perceive.

It seems to me from this thread that there are quite a few high-HHI parents and grads of top colleges at local public schools (on a real number basis, not a % basis), so the person who claimed there simply aren't many of those in public schools was wrong.

Look, statistically most people choose public school. 90% of all kids are in public school last I read somewhere. But in the private school population, high HHI kids are over represented for obvious reasons. If you think going to a selective school has any correlations with HHI (either because smart means high income, or rich folks got into Yale), then top college graduates are also over represented at the top private schools. However, over reppresented does not mean there are more Harvard graduates parents in private schools than public schools, because more people are in public schools.

Spot on.

This thread seems to be a thinly veiled "please reassure me that posh people send their kids to public school."

Yes, OP. Plenty of posh people send their kids to public school. Tons of them. You're not ghetto because you send your kids to public school. Feel better now?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP,

I am telling you it is most likely there are more Harvard graduates who send kids to public school than private school in this area because most kids go to public school.

That is all I said. Relax.

Fair enough. I'm just growing frustrated because I've been challenged a few times on this thread to justify my question.

As an aside, I take your point that if 9-of-10 parents are sending their children to public schools, then it's reasonable to assume at least 6-of-10 Harvard parents (a majority) are doing the same. However, the claim I faced on another thread was that Harvard parents would almost exclusively choose private schools, so would be far underrepresented in the public schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Spot on.

This thread seems to be a thinly veiled "please reassure me that posh people send their kids to public school."

Yes, OP. Plenty of posh people send their kids to public school. Tons of them. You're not ghetto because you send your kids to public school. Feel better now?

And again, you're totally missing where I'm coming from .... Please keep your assumptions to yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP,

I am telling you it is most likely there are more Harvard graduates who send kids to public school than private school in this area because most kids go to public school.

That is all I said. Relax.

Fair enough. I'm just growing frustrated because I've been challenged a few times on this thread to justify my question.

As an aside, I take your point that if 9-of-10 parents are sending their children to public schools, then it's reasonable to assume at least 6-of-10 Harvard parents (a majority) are doing the same. However, the claim I faced on another thread was that Harvard parents would almost exclusively choose private schools, so would be far underrepresented in the public schools.

Bzuh? If someone makes a statement, you're really wasting your time on a thread like this because

1) the data here are pretty unscientific
2) the person who wrote that is obviously either exaggerating for effect* or is dumb.

*Yes, I would expect Ivy parents to be somewhat overrepresented in private schools for multiple reasons. But I can't imagine who would claim that they "almost exclusively" choose private schools, in which case see "dumb".

[Anonymous]

^^ sorry, should read "such a statement"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP,

I am telling you it is most likely there are more Harvard graduates who send kids to public school than private school in this area because most kids go to public school.

That is all I said. Relax.

Fair enough. I'm just growing frustrated because I've been challenged a few times on this thread to justify my question.

As an aside, I take your point that if 9-of-10 parents are sending their children to public schools, then it's reasonable to assume at least 6-of-10 Harvard parents (a majority) are doing the same. However, the claim I faced on another thread was that Harvard parents would almost exclusively choose private schools, so would be far underrepresented in the public schools.

Sorry, but that doesn't make logical sense at all. There is such a thing as disproportionate distribution. Unless there is some study or poll showing exactly the number of ivy grad that send their kids to public v private, there's no way to know. This poll of yours isn't going to be accurate.

[Anonymous]

There are many terrific public schools around here. There are plenty of very smart, very well educated, interesting, talented, sophisticated, worldly people who send their kids to these schools. Sometimes people justify private school by making the public schools sound like some sub-par monolith of mediocrity. That has not been our experience. Well-educated parents in a public school community have high standards and expect the schools to deliver. That is why some of these schools are excellent.
This doesn't diminish the role of private schools - there's a place for everything. But I've not seen evidence of some great divide between the high-performing public schools vs. the vast majority of private schools. Similar parent populations demanding the same great education.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^ OP, interesting thread. Thank you for starting it. Our family is one of the one Ivy parent, two lawyer, high income, MCPS public school families.

Over time, I've been surprised at the offhanded mean-spiritedness of some in the DC area dismissively talk about the public schools (some clearly never even investigating the schools for their own kids). Looking at this area's public schools in this way is shocking to me b/c it is so at-odds with the reality.

Our Bethesda public is full of engaged, smart, high-achieving parents who are very involved in all aspects of school life. As a result, the school is a thriving center of learning and community. I always laugh when someone describes how they just "have" to pay go private because it is the only way to provide their child a good education. It is simply not true. Parental education level is the single most important factor in a child's educational success. Period. When you have public schools full of smart, well-educated parents, you have great public schools. I'm happy to have my kids in a great one.

....when you can successfully zone out poorer, less-educated parents, you have great "public" schools...

both HYP grad, one PhD Stanford, one top ten law school, both went to privates (me here big 3) spouse NYC, kids in BASIS DC which is over 40% FARMS, majority minority, and at the moment extremely rough and tumble at times. But kids are learning a ton. Admission by lottery not where you live in DC, came from DCPS ES, still have one there. HHI 250k but when I went to private here the expense was not so great so the kids were more down to earth, spouse had full ride to NYC prep school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^^ OP, interesting thread. Thank you for starting it. Our family is one of the one Ivy parent, two lawyer, high income, MCPS public school families.

Over time, I've been surprised at the offhanded mean-spiritedness of some in the DC area dismissively talk about the public schools (some clearly never even investigating the schools for their own kids). Looking at this area's public schools in this way is shocking to me b/c it is so at-odds with the reality.

Our Bethesda public is full of engaged, smart, high-achieving parents who are very involved in all aspects of school life. As a result, the school is a thriving center of learning and community. I always laugh when someone describes how they just "have" to pay go private because it is the only way to provide their child a good education. It is simply not true. Parental education level is the single most important factor in a child's educational success. Period. When you have public schools full of smart, well-educated parents, you have great public schools. I'm happy to have my kids in a great one.

....when you can successfully zone out poorer, less-educated parents, you have great "public" schools...

both HYP grad, one PhD Stanford, one top ten law school, both went to privates (me here big 3) spouse NYC, kids in BASIS DC which is over 40% FARMS, majority minority, and at the moment extremely rough and tumble at times. But kids are learning a ton. Admission by lottery not where you live in DC, came from DCPS ES, still have one there. HHI 250k but when I went to private here the expense was not so great so the kids were more down to earth, spouse had full ride to NYC prep school.

Hate when people type like this, makes them look uneducated. Is hard to read. Would an Ivy League grad really have such poor writing skills, sorry can't figure out actually what you're trying to say, if could translate great, thanks.

[Anonymous]

DH went to an Ivy for grad school.

Our kids started at a private school for preschool. We left after K. A good school, but just not worth the $. We are now at a Title 1 public elementary in APS and are very, very happy.

HHI is well above 400K depending on his bonus.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH went to an Ivy for grad school.

Our kids started at a private school for preschool. We left after K. A good school, but just not worth the $. We are now at a Title 1 public elementary in APS and are very, very happy.

HHI is well above 400K depending on his bonus.

PP here. I have to say when I hear this, I am surprised. Not so much that you could be happy at APS, because I do think APS has great options but that you could afford to send your kid either to private or a low FARMS/top test score public school but chose public school anyway and had the faith it would work out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One Ivy, both grad degrees, HHI above 800k and GE way above 3, public (in Alexandria City no less). Disappointed by lousy private experiences, happy about public academics, and like the other public families a lot. No regrets whatsoever about yanking from private.

We had our kids in private, too and yanked them. DH and I both went private PK-12. He did grad school at an Ivy. Our HHI is about 450K so we can afford it too but are much happier in public and I agree that the parents and the kids are so much nicer to be around.

Might depend on the private school and public school as far as the friendliness factor. We switched from a highly rated MCPS school to parochial school and I've found in general the families to be friendlier at the parochial school than our public school. I used to wonder if I was wearing my invisibility cloak when I went to events like the Halloween party or PTA meetings. At the new school, people will introduce themselves and include you in group conversations. My child has also done better with friendships and I will admit part of that is the small environment and less choices.

[Anonymous]

both HYP grad, one PhD Stanford, one top ten law school, both went to privates (me here big 3) spouse NYC, kids in BASIS DC which is over 40% FARMS, majority minority, and at the moment extremely rough and tumble at times. But kids are learning a ton. Admission by lottery not where you live in DC, came from DCPS ES, still have one there. HHI 250k but when I went to private here the expense was not so great so the kids were more down to earth, spouse had full ride to NYC prep school.

Hate when people type like this, makes them look uneducated. Is hard to read. Would an Ivy League grad really have such poor writing skills, sorry can't figure out actually what you're trying to say, if could translate great, thanks.


I am not the PP but I understood it just fine. Busy people write like this for busy people to read. Why are you so judgmental?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH went to an Ivy for grad school.

Our kids started at a private school for preschool. We left after K. A good school, but just not worth the $. We are now at a Title 1 public elementary in APS and are very, very happy.

HHI is well above 400K depending on his bonus.

PP here. I have to say when I hear this, I am surprised. Not so much that you could be happy at APS, because I do think APS has great options but that you could afford to send your kid either to private or a low FARMS/top test score public school but chose public school anyway and had the faith it would work out.

I am an Ivy grad, but our HHI is not stratospheric, around $300k. Presently have one in private K and another a few years out. We know we'll find the tuition for two unmanageable, so we are keen to shift to a top-tier public schools. We happen to be mapped to a Title 1 school, which is not an option we would consider. We will seek lottery options or move before we pull our kid out of private. My anecdotal view is that tuition has dramatically outpaced inflation, so the professional Ivy grads at privates are diminishing (excluding top-tier law, finance etc.). I went to private myself, but it would take a far greater share of HHI today to send a kid to private school than it did for my parents in the early 1990s.

I'd still invest in Ivy or other top-tier college tuition without hesitation, but relative to top-tier public schools (especially for elementary) I think the value proposition for private school is diminishing for many professionals given the opportunity costs....if money was no object, I'd likely not hesitate and keep the kids in private throughout.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH went to an Ivy for grad school.

Our kids started at a private school for preschool. We left after K. A good school, but just not worth the $. We are now at a Title 1 public elementary in APS and are very, very happy.

HHI is well above 400K depending on his bonus.

PP here. I have to say when I hear this, I am surprised. Not so much that you could be happy at APS, because I do think APS has great options but that you could afford to send your kid either to private or a low FARMS/top test score public school but chose public school anyway and had the faith it would work out.

We aren't the only family with similar HHI's at our school who made the same choice. It's the best thing we did for our children and our family. I didn't say this before but my graduate work is in education so we made an (for lack of a better word) educated decision. My children are receiving a better education than they were at our 30K plus per year private school. The teachers are stronger, there is more individualization and they're more challenged. Moreover, it's "real" at our current school. People are more genuine and kind and there's less of a bubble surrounding our kids.