HHI of $1m, NW of ~12m. I have one LV that was $4k because I bought it in Europe where they are cheaper and you get the VAT back. Nothing else over $1k. Everyone is different. |
Kanye spent $8M on my ring. $1M is sad. |
No minimum HHI/NW required. You just have to be a douchebag. |
With these stats it’s insane to buy an $8k bag. She needs to dial it down to a Coach bag. |
Consider a $200 handbag with $7,800 in cash inside the bag. |
If you can afford it I would say buy it, but the worthless comment is really problematic for both of you.
I’m guessing she feels like you see her as not worth it (aka “worthless”), and is therefore projecting what she makes it mean if you don’t buy it onto you. Hereby calling you worthless. If I were you I would say “hey, I’m going to buy this bag because I see how much you love it and I really want you to have the things you want when we can afford it. More importantly I want you to know that you are worth so much to me, and it really hurts when you tell me I am worthless if I don’t buy you something. I believe maybe I make you feel like I don’t value your worth though, and I want you to know I do, but it’s not this bag that proves it, it’s something that holds true all the time regardless of our circumstances. Let’s not tie our worth to each other to things. Let’s connect in ways and learn to speak to each other in ways that make us feel valued and seen.” |
+1. Lord, when this was us, we didn’t even spend 8k on a family vacation. Now that our HHI is double, we still wouldn’t. It’s insane that an 8k bag exists, even dumber to buy one. The people who influence women to buy these things are given the bags for free anyway. The whole racket is pathetic and sad. |
Stupid. This is a test of OP as a provider. He either steps up or his wife looks for a better option (she would be anyway). Doubtful that she wants to be struck with a scrub. |
Isn’t there a less expensive Chanel bag you can buy? Meet her in the middle. |
It's not just one's own personal budget alone that determines what's frivolous or not. It's one thing to have enough income that one doesn't have to or want to settle for the absolute cheapest (and possibly shoddiest) accessories on the market. But even if I were a billionaire, I'd have a hard time spending 8k on a purse given how little access some people have to basic necessities. Also, the research shows that people attain longer-lasting satisfaction from experiences, especially when they bring people together, than from material things. In any case, someone supporting a family of four on an income of 250k definitely doesn't have 8k to spend on a purse. |
Honestly, OP, you'd be better off spending the money on a therapist for yourself to figure out why you value someone who clearly doesn't value you. Also, once people hit a certain threshold of security and opportunity, material acquisitions don't increase happiness in a meaningful way. It has to come from within. |