NY Mag: Daycare is Broken

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Btw at least in Maryland it doesn't matter if a child is 3 months old or 15 months old, the same ratios (1 teacher for 3 infants/toddlers) is required. The costs are the same.

which is also ridiculous.

What would you change?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I understand that it is normal and expected that women want to have a career and maximize their potential. But, it also seems normal to want to care for your own baby when they are infants and toddlers, until they are old enough to self report about their day and also to attend actual school full time. What I guess I don't understand is that the career and self actualization seems to have become more important than that time spent with your young children. I think the reason there are "mommy wars" is because these two things are both very important. Each of us prioritizes according to our beliefs but there is no one correct answer.

I don't personally think it is the government or society's obligation to satisfy one or the other of these choices, especially when it actually is a choice.

The difference between you and me is that I completely understand why you want to SAH, but you don't understand why I don't want to SAH and are blatantly and unapologetically judging my choice.

I guess so because I do definitely believe that it's important and very valuable to families and society for infants and toddlers to be cared for by a parent who wants to be doing that. I don't think you "completely understand" that at all given your judgmental tone in your reply.

Think what you like. I will say I do not think SAHMs harm their children simply by staying home. I do not think SAHMs are lazy or selfish. My mother was SAHM. She was very unhappy and angry until she started WOH, so for her I don't think being a sahm was great for her or for us.

Clearly, you think I have harmed my child be sending her to daycare. You are the aggressor in the "mommy wars", not me. Call that judgmental if you like.

You are attributing beliefs to me that I don't have. I think it is unlikely that a child will be harmed by daycare if their parents don't want to be a stay at home parent. You are simply deflecting by calling me the aggressor and judgmental when you own that yourself.

You said you think it's important for infants and toddlers to be cared for by a parent. You obviously believe daycare is bad for kids and are backtracking because I called you out on it.

I believe it's important for infants and toddlers to be cared for by a parent who wants to care for them, or next optimal option might be cared for by a relative who loves them completely. If those are not an option they are better off in daycare. You can, and obviously will, interpret that any way you want.

No interpretation needed, your meaning is obvious. It's also pretty simplistic and wrong for many families as already elaborated on this thread. But carry on with your judging. I'm sure it gives you satisfaction.