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Infants, Toddlers, & Preschoolers
Grandma wants to give 3 yr old a water gun
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Anonymous
| I'm not a gun fan and am trying to go as long as possible before my DS starts turning any object into a play gun. Grandma has a water gun waiting for him when we go visit this summer and I'd prefer he didn't have it yet. But I don't want to offend her either. What would you do? Should I just go with the flow or stand up for what I want? Thanks |
Anonymous
| This would not be a hill for me. I'd let this one slide and save up for something big to take a stand on. Like you said, it's only a matter of time before he'll turn a stick or finger into a gun. |
Anonymous
|
I am also anti gun. I am on your side here. However, I think it's an exercise in futility to keep kids away from gun play. I mean, when they can point their own fingers and make gun noises, it's pretty hard to control, you know.
My suggestion is, ask grandma to get a second water gun for you. Call them sprayers (or some other non-gun term). Have an awesome summer. |
Anonymous
| Is it your mother or tour MIL? If you think she would understand I would ask her to exchange it for one of those water squished foam things, still shoots water but doesn't look anything like a gun. If you think it's going to cause a big issue just let it go, you can leave it at grandmas and get him non-gun looking ones for your house |
Anonymous
| PP here, that should be water squirter foam things |
Anonymous
| Argh. I totally agree that there is no way to keep kids away from gun play. However, I don't think its okay to encourage it. On vacation recently, my son played nicely at the pool with a group of boys the first day. The next day, someone brought water guns and the atmosphere changed - the boys got aggressive, mean, and unruly, they were fighting and acting out, and adult intervention was required numerous times. I went from having fun to having a stressful time at the pool. I say either just say no to the water gun, or tell granma that it has to stay at her house and that she gets to supervise when its being used. |
Anonymous
| Let it go. Water guns are so much fun. Do you honestly think that it will turn your child into a gun-loving killer? I'm sorry but you are overreacting here. There are greater things in life to worry about. |
Anonymous
| Water guns are fun, and I don't equate them with gun play as they clearly shoot water. You can get one that doesn't resemble a gun all that much. Harmless fun for kids. |
Anonymous
| Op here. Thanks for your advice so far. It's MIL so that makes it a little trickier for sure |
Anonymous
|
IMO - I'm also anti-gun but not anti play guns (if that makes sense). Kids will turn sticks, their fingers, etc into "guns" it's a normal part of play and figuring out the complex world of good vs. bad. As long as they aren't hurting each other, no big deal. And water guns are fun.
Playing guns does not negate teaching gun safety or that real guns are not toys and can hurt people. In fact, I wonder if prohibiting gun play could have the opposite effect and make them even more interested in guns. |
Anonymous
| I have a different view of this, as a young child repeatedly squirted me and my special needs daughter with her squirt gun at the pool this weekend. It's not a "gun play" issue. Whether you have your child play with guns is a private issue between you and your child. But when you give a child a squirt gun, you involve other people because a squirt gun -- ready for it? -- squirts other people. You need to know the child has the ability and discretion to use or not use the thing in the right situation. I don't think a three year old has that. Sorry. |
Anonymous
That's another issue, imo. Last year a boy kept throwing cupfuls of water into smaller kid's faces and laughing. No water gun involved. Squirt guns don't have to squirt people. They can squirt things. They can squirt water. You can teach them to only squirt people who also have a squirt gun and want to play, and to only squirt legs or arms or some other body part. |
Anonymous
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Ah yes...I'm fairly anti-gun. Never have had play guns (or anything similar) in my house. My 5 yo DS still went through a phase where he liked imaginary play guns. He even said as much to his preschool teachers on a "what is your favorite thing to do?" form. Needless to say I was horrified (at least until his preschool teachers told me that it may be b/c his best friend at school was talking about playing cops/robbers right before they asked the question...).
Short of it is that you won't be able to keep them from this kind of play for long, so you need to decide if it is worth the fight for a water gun. Also, give your son some credit, he will know the difference between a fun water gun and a real-looking one. If it really really bothers you, ask your MIL in buy the tube squirting things instead. |
Anonymous
| Slightly OT, but pretend violent play is perfectly natural for small kids, and is actually beneficial in that it helps kids act out good vs. evil, right vs. wrong, and even helps develop feelings of empathy. It's much different than exposure to media violence or (sadly) person-to-person violence at home. I used to be anti-toy gun, too, but it just seems to be an inherent part of my son. He's allowed water guns only, and we have tons of fun each summer (me included). |
Anonymous
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We are as anti-gun as you can get. My children will NOT have guns for toys. I know they'll pretend other objects are guns (already have) but I can only control what I can control.
All that said - we allowed water gusn this year. Started with the foam squirters and ended with little water guns. I found water guns that don't really look like guns (they are shaped like animals) and we call them squirters. They have such fun, I don't regret it. |