Do you entertain? (Inspire me, please!)

[Anonymous]

Before kids, I used to throw dinner parties pretty frequently, maybe once a month or so, but since having kids (and moving to a new city) I hardly ever have anyone over. My kids are 4 and 18 month. Part of it is our house, which is generally a mess -- but this is fixable with a little effort. The other part is that having a dinner party with other people with kids tends to be pretty chaotic and not so much fun, as the kids require so much attention. Any suggestions for entertaining? Do you have people over frequently, and if so, how old are your kids?

[Anonymous]

Once a month dinner parties- Yikes! That's too much for my taste.

We used to occasionally have game nights that everyone enjoyed. Now we don't because I am tired, we have a 14 month old, and I just feel like I am in a different stage then before. We haven't had people over in ages and I am fine with that.

Perhaps we will start to entertain again, but it won't be like before, it would have to be child friendly.

[Anonymous]

We went through a dry period as well...it lasted several years, or at least until the kids were old enough to be well behaved for guests. But as PP mentioned, the focus of the entertainment must change....it now has to be centered around the kids. So when you have friends over, make it centered around the age of kids that you want to have over. Put a kiddie pool out or a small moonbounce with lots of balls. And bubbles!!! And the food....you either serve 2 dinners, one for adults and one for the kids, or you just create one kid-approved meal.

Once you have kids, entertaining is much less formal. My china hasn't seen the light of day for 12 years now. Buy some fun plasticware dishes and move the entertaining outside where the kids can run and play without tearing up the house.

This part of your life is going to last a while....at least until your youngest is 6 or 7.

[Anonymous]

11:36 here again. And don't worry about your house being such a mess. Other parents will appreciate your house NOT looking like a museum and it will make them much more at home knowing that their kids will not break anything. At least that's how I felt when taking my kids to other people's homes.

[Anonymous]

I love to entertain and wasn't going to let the advent of children stop me. When they were younger, I hired a babysitter. Also, all my dinner parties were for adults only. I believe other parents would like to have an evening without kids in tow and be able to carry on adult conversations with other adults. We have a swimming pool and kids were invited to pool parties.

[Anonymous]

Now that it's warm outside, could you do backyard bar-b-q/picnics instead of a nice dinner party?

[Anonymous]

When our kids were younger, we splurged on a sitter (sometimes two) to watch our kids and our guests' kids, and we fed them a simple meal first. Now that our kids and our friends' kids are older (upper elementary), we still feed them straightaway but don't need the sitter. Some of our friends' go the adults-only route, and that's fine, too, but be sure you're clear about it when you invite. We've been caught be surprise on a couple of occasions.

[Anonymous]

We haven't had an adults-only party since DC was born but that doesn't mean the adults sit around and watch the kids play all evening long. If you have kids of similar ages, not counting your 18 month old, hopefully the kids will be able to entertain themselves for the most part. Make sure to have activities/toys accessible in designated areas (inside and/or out) where they can play. (You don't need to go nuts with stuff -- just use what you have at home unless you want to do some theme.) We don't have as many 20, 40+ guest parties any more, but anywhere from one to four couples and their kids is something we don't think twice about anymore. And while our house is pretty clean, the clutter fairy often visits. I've stopped considering what others will think and now just pour the wine!

If you want to go more formal or have fewer interruptions then hire a sitter, even an older kid from the neighborhood to help entertain the kids.