+1 BUT be sure to give each grandchild the SAME amount, OP. You do not want your legacy to be that you were a senile witch who showed favoritism |
Disagree. There are takers, and there are those who are self sufficient. Takers should not be rewarded. Each kid should be given the same - or just give it all to charity. |
+1 No way should the parent give more to one adult child (especially just because they have kids!) |
Too bad. One of mine is a drug addict and my plan is to give to all of the children plus the grandchildren. |
Some people feel very strongly in the continuation of their families. Grandkids are very important and it's important to know that their genes will go on. My kids all have personal relationships with their grandparents and it brought a lot of comfort to my parents having grandkids. That being said, I personally think that kids should get the same amount and then grandkids get a separate amount. |
That is probably the best way to do it. Kids get the same. Grandchildren get something themselves |
One that parents can support. Selfish? No, I'm not going to subsidize that. |
Then, yes, maybe I should leave them money for mental health care. |
If you're lucky enough to have an estate--can give equal amounts to each child and separate amounts to each grandchild. They all get acknowledged as the people they are. |
This is how I look at things too. We will pay for grandchildren’s educations from PreK- college, at least, and set up trusts for them as adults. Will give same amounts of money to adult children for wedding, down payment, and trust accessible in adulthood. |
I have three kids. Sister has two.
We will receive the same, and were told this at an appropriate age so that we could plan our lives accordingly. It will not be an enormous amount. I don’t have any issues with this. I respect that my parents can do as they choose with their money, and am grateful they are passing money to us. The choice to have three children was mine. Her kids might be a little more secure down the road, but that is a reflection of the choices we each made. |
You're leaving money to your children, not your grandchildren. It should be even. |
Agree. But if your intent is to leave any money to your grandchildren, then do it directly. DH's grandparents left money to their children to then leave to the grandchildren. DH only learned recently that all the gifts his parents were making to him were from the grandparents. He is grateful for them, yet also thinks it's weird that his parents presented them as if they were from them, not the prior generation. |
This is what I will do with my modest (by dcum standards) estate. I do want my potential grandchildren to have something. But my parents aren't doing that, for whatever reason. It's all going to sibling and I. I have the only grandkids and they are really close to my parent/s (one just passed). I don't think it's an intentional thing, it's just how the family has always done. I will gift some to my kids upon my parent's passing-but I don't talk about it now. |
That’s not as savy as you think. The adult children have already had more investment into them, because they are older. If the parents die, the minor children will need to become adults and also share their parents’ money with the adult children. So the adult children will end up getting more, when they’re adults and can fend for themselves. |