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Why do I still feel anxious?
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Anonymous
| So, I made my choice, sent in my check and my rejections. I was hoping to feel happy at this point, feel some sort of closure. But instead I am very anxious about whether my DS will fit in and do okay at his new school. Anybody else feel this way? Or am I just showing that I am the mother of an only child and will make up things to worry about even when there are none (though I have to admit: no school really was a great fit. I wish I could have sent him to the public middle school I went to in New Jersey, in a wealthy suburb, but I'm just not as rich as my parents were and can not live in such an exclusive community) |
Anonymous
|
I am also a bundle of nerves. The school that DH and the child wanted (for middle school) she was waitlisted. Her second choice rejected her. Her third choice I personally think is a great fit for her but she has fixated on the wait listed school. There's almost no hope there as the class is small, although I think if there was a spot she would be next on the list. We have some public school options that are OK as well but nothing that is really a good fit there. I want her to be realistic and realize that the 3rd school is also very nice (she had a good visit and didn't dislike it when she went for the day). Maybe it's just the thought of the transition in general that's overwhelming.
Anyway, I find myself very anxious about how this will all turn out. We have to send in a deposit check next week... |
Anonymous
| Anxiety here as well. But, in a different way. We haven't made our decision yet. WL at first choice school with anticipated zero chances of movement. Accepted at 2 other great choices. Can't decide b/n the 2. Only have a few more days.....sigh. |
Anonymous
| It's normal to feel anxious. Whatever choice you make -- you will sometimes have second thoughts. Do the very best you can do -- that's all any of us can do -- we all want the best for our kids. |
Anonymous
| I feel more sad than anxious, having sent in deposit and contract today. I have no doubt that the school we've picked -- which was our first choice from the beginning -- will be an excellent fit for dd and that she will thrive there. But it makes me very sad that we won't be part of our neighborhood public school community. It's a loss for me -- it wouldn't have been the right school for dd -- and I know school is for dd, not me -- but nevertheless it makes me sad. |
Anonymous
| 11:56 I had that same sense of loss when we went private from DCPS. In fact when I saw Waiting for Superman I sobbed. That's how conflicted I remain. But in the end, it is a superior eduction. It just is. |
Anonymous
I can completely relate to this. I haven't actually made my choice which is between my neighborhood school (supposed to be good, nice community, i have doubts about the academics) and the only independent we applied to (not too far, really good academics but not the neighborhood school and costs money). i'm not so clear what is best for my child actually. i guess i'll really never know since you can only "live" one option. |
Anonymous
| I just saw this thread and am so relieved to see that other parents feel the same way I do. We were lucky to be choosing between really great options for DD and have now made a decision, but still feel unsettled about whether we made the right choice for her. |
Anonymous
| So where did you choose OP? |
Anonymous
OP: I don't want to say which school, since it is small and I don't think many DCUM parents choose it. I'm not sure I want my new community to know that I'm not sure we are a great fit 
But it is wonderful to see that I'm not the only one who feels conflicted! (for 12:23: if you are below middle school, I'd go for my local school. My DS and I had a great experience with our public elementary school. But the middle school is just too large and too poor. I can handle up to 50% free and reduced lunch, but more than that... I'm just not brave enough and assured enough about my parenting schools to risk that) |
Anonymous
Just because children and their families are poor does not mean that they aren't kind, respectful, caring people who value education. This kind of comment irks me so much. It makes me glad that we are leaving private school for public (where more than 50% of the students are on free and reduced lunch) because it's these kinds of attitudes that make me sick to my stomach. |
Anonymous
| They may be kind, respectful and caring people, but they have much greater needs than my DS. I totally understand that, to the teachers in those schools, my son is not worth their time. |
Anonymous
| Not wishing this anxiety on anybody, but glad to know I'm not totally crazy or may be just not totally alone. After many agonizing discussions and pro/con lists, we chose a public school over a prestigious school that we alway thought our child would attend if admitted. A part of me feels guilty for not chosing the private school because I feel we are not giving our child the "best" when we can afford to and not sure we are making the right decision. Not concerned about what other people may think, just that I am still trying to get over the fact that this school with its top notch reputation isn't so great and that we wont' be giving our child the great education with the "lush green campus life" we wanted to. The illusion began to unravel when it became apparent to us that the private school's reputation is stronger than what really exist and that the education at the public high school is much stronger. I guess these illusions exist for all of us because we want to believe they are true and who's really checking... When we receive the accetance letter we're all so happy and appreciative that our child was accepted into this exclusive and prestigous school that I think many of us either are afraid to ask the hard questions and/or just believe blindly in its reputation. I was surprised at how many parents we spoke to who did not request to sit in on actual classrooms in action. I think a few are afraid to rock the boat. A private tour of the school's beautiful facilities, the open house and glossy information packets and websites only further the illusion and is no substitution for sitting in a classroom and observing even for a little while. We were surprisingly disappointed, but we saw and then discovered how the school responded. Anyone else chose a public school over a prestigous private school? |
Anonymous
| PP: what public school did you choose? (I did sit in on classes at my private school. They weren't as good as I had hoped they would be, but they certainly beat our local public) |
Anonymous
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I have kids at a big three private school and think my kids would get a comparable education at a very good public high school with a strong IB program. So far, I've spent about $500,000 educating my 3 kids. We are only 1/3 of the way through the process if you include college.
A CPA would tell me to go to public but an MBA might say its a good investment. In my heart, I know my kids are really happy and love their school and their friends. |