White people

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I judge anything starting with La, Sha and ending in qua, isha

Just like I judge little Susan, Beth, Timmy, Tommy,

I'm going to name my kid Susanisha Labethqua just to confuse you.

very confusing, i would have to ask the parent.. how unquie... where did that come from?

[Anonymous]

What about the 'white people' thing in the south of double first names? They're all upper upper middle class, old money...

I'm thinking of the girls I went to college with from Alabama/ Mississippi/GA/SC who are named/did for their daughter Katie/Anne/Mary and then a last name -

Mary Mitchell
Katie Mack
Anne Carter
Sarah Benton
Annie Lawson

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What about the 'white people' thing in the south of double first names? They're all upper upper middle class, old money...

I'm thinking of the girls I went to college with from Alabama/ Mississippi/GA/SC who are named/did for their daughter Katie/Anne/Mary and then a last name -

Mary Mitchell
Katie Mack
Anne Carter
Sarah Benton
Annie Lawson

Probably an anomaly on this board... but I LOVE those type of names. There's one in my DD's Maryland prek and I think it's so cute.

[Anonymous]

I named my daughter Sabine. I got lots of heat from my family, because they had never heard of it, and thought it would be troublesome for her later in life. Turns out, we looked at my husband's family tree (dating back to 1663, all German), and there were lots of of "Sabinas" or "Sabine."

His family was proud of me for keeping the name in the family. I had no idea. I just named her after a character in a book I loved in college.

My mom is still pissed, and calls her by a different name. My daughter doesn't correct her, but ignores it. Go Sabine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you mispronounce and look down on black names?

What would you think of a black man named Mark versus a black man name DeMarcus?

Do you think Mark was raised by a college educated nuclear black family, or was he adopted? Did DeMarcus grow up in subsidized housing never knowing his father?

My name is Arabic, traditionally used in the black community. After my freshman year of college I went by the nickname Nicole and the change was obvious. I was still a black woman, but so there was a privilege in going by Nicole.

I had my children, and gave them top 100 Euro-centralist names, believing this was better for them.

My daughter has friend, a white child from an upper middle class family, named Karsynne. My son has a boy in his class named Wolff. I know so many white kids with names that are absolutely bizarre, completely made up and I want to kick myself for not naming my daughter Iesha. I thought I could erase a bit of their blackness, and it would help them navigate.

Seeing my Michael next to a blue eyed, blonde haired little boy named Maverick and I just have to laugh.

I like Michael 100000 times over maverick (sounds like a constipation relief med) or DeMarcus.
Marcus is good, though.
In general, I love classic Christian names, Mark is a great name for a black or white boy. Mark has college educated parents, DeMarcus and Tyron have very young parents, may be with not too college under the belt.
It's not just here in States, it's in a lot of countries, the poorer the parents, the more pompous (and often foreign) the baby's name. Not sure why. Compensation of some sort.

Made up manes are a different story. Deranged parents who seriously read the books about infants sexuality.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm white and hate made up "you-nique" names, or names that are really just words (or titles) -- Apple, True, Saint, Princess, King, Kulture, Reign, Heiress, etc., to use celebrity kids names as an example. My husband is black and really hates names that he thinks signal "hood," like the names they make up on the Key & Peele football sketch, and he'll laugh at a made up name with a demonstrably "white" feel, like Karsynne or Wolff in your examples, but they don't get under his skin the same way. But he's not as bothered as I am by the words-for-names thing (Journee, Seven, things like that).

I think there's a lot of proof out there by now that a name that identifies someone as part of a group that is discriminated against -- black, hispanic, Muslim, Jewish, etc. -- can be used as a proxy for that discrimination, especially in the resume examples. I'm sorry you missed out on Iesha though. That's pretty.

It's like reading Kentucky Derby catalog of participating horses....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you mispronounce and look down on black names?

What would you think of a black man named Mark versus a black man name DeMarcus?

Do you think Mark was raised by a college educated nuclear black family, or was he adopted? Did DeMarcus grow up in subsidized housing never knowing his father?

My name is Arabic, traditionally used in the black community. After my freshman year of college I went by the nickname Nicole and the change was obvious. I was still a black woman, but so there was a privilege in going by Nicole.

I had my children, and gave them top 100 Euro-centralist names, believing this was better for them.

My daughter has friend, a white child from an upper middle class family, named Karsynne. My son has a boy in his class named Wolff. I know so many white kids with names that are absolutely bizarre, completely made up and I want to kick myself for not naming my daughter Iesha. I thought I could erase a bit of their blackness, and it would help them navigate.

Seeing my Michael next to a blue eyed, blonde haired little boy named Maverick and I just have to laugh.

I like Michael 100000 times over maverick (sounds like a constipation relief med) or DeMarcus.
Marcus is good, though.
In general, I love classic Christian names, Mark is a great name for a black or white boy. Mark has college educated parents, DeMarcus and Tyron have very young parents, may be with not too college under the belt.
It's not just here in States, it's in a lot of countries, the poorer the parents, the more pompous (and often foreign) the baby's name. Not sure why. Compensation of some sort.

Made up manes are a different story. Deranged parents who seriously read the books about infants sexuality.

Nailed it

[Anonymous]

OP, I have a good friend who is AA and writes for a national paper (won't say which one for fear of identifying her). She said she didn't change her last name when she got married because it sounded "too black". This woman has won a Pulitizer and still has to worry about stuff like names. Made me sad.

You wouldn't want your kid to miss out on a chance at an interview because they had some made up name.

[Anonymous]

Read Freakonomics

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I named my daughter Sabine. I got lots of heat from my family, because they had never heard of it, and thought it would be troublesome for her later in life. Turns out, we looked at my husband's family tree (dating back to 1663, all German), and there were lots of of "Sabinas" or "Sabine."

His family was proud of me for keeping the name in the family. I had no idea. I just named her after a character in a book I loved in college.

My mom is still pissed, and calls her by a different name. My daughter doesn't correct her, but ignores it. Go Sabine.

Sabine seems like a great name, and your Mom should back down. That said, given that your daughter ignores it, I'd do the same if I were you. No, wait, that's not true; I'd totally call my Mom out on it in the appropriate time and place. (Appropriate time and place means plenty of time to talk about it, no one else within earshot, and on a nice day when things are good between you. Like, take a nice walk in the park.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:White person here. Yes, I look down on traditionally "ghetto" names such as Tyrone and Laquisha. However this is not unique to White people. Asians, Hispanics, Middle Easterners, middle class African Americans - they all look down on these names.

Many people were named Tyrone after the actor Tyrone Power who is white. My dad is black but this is why his mom named him that and I suspect many other people coming up in her time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I named my daughter Sabine. I got lots of heat from my family, because they had never heard of it, and thought it would be troublesome for her later in life. Turns out, we looked at my husband's family tree (dating back to 1663, all German), and there were lots of of "Sabinas" or "Sabine."

His family was proud of me for keeping the name in the family. I had no idea. I just named her after a character in a book I loved in college.

My mom is still pissed, and calls her by a different name. My daughter doesn't correct her, but ignores it. Go Sabine.

Sabine was my number one choice for a girl. Two boys later I never got the chance but I love it and don't see why it would be weird at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yep. White people can give their kids all kinds of "unconventional" names and it's not judged as being low class, uneducated, etc. But when black people do it, it's "ghetto."

Honestly, I don't care if people want to name their kids Karsynne or DeMarcus but it should be judged in the same way (or not judged at all). The double standard when it comes to this type of stuff is ridicilous.

It's not a double standard. We also judge Kody and Destiny.

But not even remotely in the same way.
Karsynne or DeMarcus: OMG ghetto rats probably gonna rob me, rape my wimmin and spend their welfare checks on crack! Call the police!

Kody or Destiny: OMG check out the kale-eating hipster spawn! Their parents probably drive a Prius.

The level of harm in the different stereotypes brought to bear are freaking light years apart.

[Anonymous]

I am Hispanic but I gave both of my kids very traditional, very American (re: WHITE) names because of this. I've had friends named "Yessi", "Maria" etc. and they've faced terrible discrimination. I remember once in college, a boy asked us if we were getting our MRS degree for a green card. In college. In America.


It's sad and true. My grandmother, first generation in my family to come to the US, changed her name from Maria Teresa to just Teresa and completely took my grandfather's last name.

It's not okay to be exotic unless you're European exotic. It's not okay to have an accent unless it's a European accent. It's not okay to have a unique, interesting name unless you're European unique.

[Anonymous]

This is true. People are biased against names associated with AA, even if a well-established "real" name. I am not AA. When I was pregnant with my daughter, I considered naming her Serena, among other names. I'd discuss names under consideration with other people and several people told me not to pick Serena because they associated it with Serena Williams. FWIW, I wasn't naming her after Serena Williams, I just happen to like the name. And what of the association? Serena Williams is a mega-successful tennis star, a role model. I'd be thrilled if my DD ended up like her. Anyway, I ended up choosing Serena and I love her name.