Do most people pay for college out of pocket?

[Anonymous]

We set a budget and chose a school at right around 40k a year. First 2 years got a housing discount of about 5k a year. We pay from savings since we didn’t do a 529.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The people congratulating themselves for sacrificing while judging others without knowing anything about their circumstances is cracking me up. OK you love your kids more than we do because you drove the same car for 10 years.

Here's what the sanctimonious self-sacrificing crowd doesn't get. There are those of us who think that YOU'RE foolish to pay 85K per year for college. It doesn't make financial sense in most cases. You're obsessed with the "best" schools when most research shows that kids going to good publics do just as well. So there are those of us who think, unless you're wealthy, it's foolish to save for 85K a year when you can get the same quality for 40K per year. We're not as into prestige and we're certainly not paying for it. So just know as you're judging us, we're also looking at your values with some critical questions....

Sorry for my tone, but the judgment assuming those who haven't saved for 85K per year are just selfishly splurging.... it's so far from how many of us approach this.

This is an A+ comment. Thank you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The people congratulating themselves for sacrificing while judging others without knowing anything about their circumstances is cracking me up. OK you love your kids more than we do because you drove the same car for 10 years.

Here's what the sanctimonious self-sacrificing crowd doesn't get. There are those of us who think that YOU'RE foolish to pay 85K per year for college. It doesn't make financial sense in most cases. You're obsessed with the "best" schools when most research shows that kids going to good publics do just as well. So there are those of us who think, unless you're wealthy, it's foolish to save for 85K a year when you can get the same quality for 40K per year. We're not as into prestige and we're certainly not paying for it. So just know as you're judging us, we're also looking at your values with some critical questions....

Sorry for my tone, but the judgment assuming those who haven't saved for 85K per year are just selfishly splurging.... it's so far from how many of us approach this.

For us, it's not about "prestige". More about "best fit". My kid wanted engineering (a somewhat unique one) and smaller (about 4-8K size) school near a city (not rural/remote). We looked for a wide range of the best schools for them. DIdn't get into their reaches but got into several in the 30-60 range, most being $75-85K+. Our state flagship is 30K+ undergrads, direct admit to "general engineering" and then you get to fight to get into your major. If you want to change your major, most things they'd want to switch to are also direct admit and you wouldn't be able to get in (Ie. Most engineers who decide they can't hack it go to business---business school is almost as hard of admit as engineering, and not many get in freshman start, and certainly not if you just killed your gpa by struggling in engineering). The only other state school that offers their engineering major is 25K+ undergrads and is a huge step down (60% of their public HS would easily get admission) and also too way too big.

We can easily afford $90K, it's saved, we are worth $$$. So we let our kid apply wherever they want. And they turned down $40K/year merit award at a T50 school to attend a T40 for full pay---because it's a better fit.
But our kid knows that 99% of kids would be attending the other school on merit of $160k over 4 years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The people congratulating themselves for sacrificing while judging others without knowing anything about their circumstances is cracking me up. OK you love your kids more than we do because you drove the same car for 10 years.

Here's what the sanctimonious self-sacrificing crowd doesn't get. There are those of us who think that YOU'RE foolish to pay 85K per year for college. It doesn't make financial sense in most cases. You're obsessed with the "best" schools when most research shows that kids going to good publics do just as well. So there are those of us who think, unless you're wealthy, it's foolish to save for 85K a year when you can get the same quality for 40K per year. We're not as into prestige and we're certainly not paying for it. So just know as you're judging us, we're also looking at your values with some critical questions....

Sorry for my tone, but the judgment assuming those who haven't saved for 85K per year are just selfishly splurging.... it's so far from how many of us approach this.

Most of us aren't "congratulateing ourselves" and are middle class, so, we actually get some aid.

The big issue many if us have is hearing those who didn't save complain. Totally fine for you to cashflow a 40k school, but don't complain that you should somehow get a discount at a 90k school.

We scrimp and save to afford the COA of 30k at the 90k school after FA. We could have stretched to 40k, but thank goodness got great aid.

[Anonymous]

It's no longer true that the bright daughter of two public-school teachers can afford to attend an Ivy or other elite private university. Schools like that just don't want students from such financially mediocre families. The doughnut hole comes up quickly for middle-aged cops, nurses, teachers, and many others with a dual-income HHI of 200K, a sad little 529, and an inner-ring ranch house as total cost of attendance at Penn approaches $100,000/year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The people congratulating themselves for sacrificing while judging others without knowing anything about their circumstances is cracking me up. OK you love your kids more than we do because you drove the same car for 10 years.

Here's what the sanctimonious self-sacrificing crowd doesn't get. There are those of us who think that YOU'RE foolish to pay 85K per year for college. It doesn't make financial sense in most cases. You're obsessed with the "best" schools when most research shows that kids going to good publics do just as well. So there are those of us who think, unless you're wealthy, it's foolish to save for 85K a year when you can get the same quality for 40K per year. We're not as into prestige and we're certainly not paying for it. So just know as you're judging us, we're also looking at your values with some critical questions....

Sorry for my tone, but the judgment assuming those who haven't saved for 85K per year are just selfishly splurging.... it's so far from how many of us approach this.

Depends on how one defines Quality. Very subjective. You do you PP. Many of us liked the options that were available to our DC's because we did save, Mine had their pick of college - perfect size, location, direct admit, flexibility to change majors, taught by professors not TA's, strong and proactive alumni network that provided mentoring and opportunities, tons of student resources including wide selection of courses each semester so didn't have to stress about scheduling or sequencing of classes, ability to double major and or minor in anything. That was our definition of quality. YMMV.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Start a 529 when the kid is born. Make monthly contributions. 18 years later = >$500,000.

Yeah. We did that and have no where near that amount of money saved.

Us too. I wonder how it could become >$500K

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Start a 529 when the kid is born. Make monthly contributions. 18 years later = >$500,000.

Yeah. We did that and have no where near that amount of money saved.

Us too. I wonder how it could become >$500K

You'd have to front load it, like 50K at birth and then 10-15K thereafter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's no longer true that the bright daughter of two public-school teachers can afford to attend an Ivy or other elite private university. Schools like that just don't want students from such financially mediocre families. The doughnut hole comes up quickly for middle-aged cops, nurses, teachers, and many others with a dual-income HHI of 200K, a sad little 529, and an inner-ring ranch house as total cost of attendance at Penn approaches $100,000/year.

That 'bright daugther' isn't getting into IVY or elite anyway. Times have changed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's no longer true that the bright daughter of two public-school teachers can afford to attend an Ivy or other elite private university. Schools like that just don't want students from such financially mediocre families. The doughnut hole comes up quickly for middle-aged cops, nurses, teachers, and many others with a dual-income HHI of 200K, a sad little 529, and an inner-ring ranch house as total cost of attendance at Penn approaches $100,000/year.

It's more true now then then.

For one, there was less aid for middle class thrn. Also, a lower chance that a kud of two unconnected teachers would get into an Ivy.

We are on the equivalent of 2 teachers' salaries, and Ivies are very affordable for us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's no longer true that the bright daughter of two public-school teachers can afford to attend an Ivy or other elite private university. Schools like that just don't want students from such financially mediocre families. The doughnut hole comes up quickly for middle-aged cops, nurses, teachers, and many others with a dual-income HHI of 200K, a sad little 529, and an inner-ring ranch house as total cost of attendance at Penn approaches $100,000/year.

It's more true now then then.

For one, there was less aid for middle class thrn. Also, a lower chance that a kud of two unconnected teachers would get into an Ivy.

We are on the equivalent of 2 teachers' salaries, and Ivies are very affordable for us.

???

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The people congratulating themselves for sacrificing while judging others without knowing anything about their circumstances is cracking me up. OK you love your kids more than we do because you drove the same car for 10 years.

Here's what the sanctimonious self-sacrificing crowd doesn't get. There are those of us who think that YOU'RE foolish to pay 85K per year for college. It doesn't make financial sense in most cases. You're obsessed with the "best" schools when most research shows that kids going to good publics do just as well. So there are those of us who think, unless you're wealthy, it's foolish to save for 85K a year when you can get the same quality for 40K per year. We're not as into prestige and we're certainly not paying for it. So just know as you're judging us, we're also looking at your values with some critical questions....

Sorry for my tone, but the judgment assuming those who haven't saved for 85K per year are just selfishly splurging.... it's so far from how many of us approach this.

Most of us aren't "congratulateing ourselves" and are middle class, so, we actually get some aid.

The big issue many if us have is hearing those who didn't save complain. Totally fine for you to cashflow a 40k school, but don't complain that you should somehow get a discount at a 90k school.

We scrimp and save to afford the COA of 30k at the 90k school after FA. We could have stretched to 40k, but thank goodness got great aid.

Fantastic but you are paying 60K less than many that also scrimped and saved. The extra $60k is A LOT. That is what you people are missing. We only drive Hondas, one is a 2006! WE don't take splashy vacations or wear name brands, etc. But--colleges have us on the hook for the full freight...even though we are scrimping and saving just as much as you. We only had 2 kids and live frugally. WE do have lots of retirement savings and paid down our mortgage as a priority...we also were funding the 529s since birth. AND if we only had to pay $30k like you--they would be able to attend the Ivies and SLACs that their hard work with no hooks got them into....but they are part of the donut hole class which is REAL no matter how much you people getting $60k discounts think it isn't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The people congratulating themselves for sacrificing while judging others without knowing anything about their circumstances is cracking me up. OK you love your kids more than we do because you drove the same car for 10 years.

Here's what the sanctimonious self-sacrificing crowd doesn't get. There are those of us who think that YOU'RE foolish to pay 85K per year for college. It doesn't make financial sense in most cases. You're obsessed with the "best" schools when most research shows that kids going to good publics do just as well. So there are those of us who think, unless you're wealthy, it's foolish to save for 85K a year when you can get the same quality for 40K per year. We're not as into prestige and we're certainly not paying for it. So just know as you're judging us, we're also looking at your values with some critical questions....

Sorry for my tone, but the judgment assuming those who haven't saved for 85K per year are just selfishly splurging.... it's so far from how many of us approach this.

Most of us aren't "congratulateing ourselves" and are middle class, so, we actually get some aid.

The big issue many if us have is hearing those who didn't save complain. Totally fine for you to cashflow a 40k school, but don't complain that you should somehow get a discount at a 90k school.

We scrimp and save to afford the COA of 30k at the 90k school after FA. We could have stretched to 40k, but thank goodness got great aid.

Fantastic but you are paying 60K less than many that also scrimped and saved. The extra $60k is A LOT. That is what you people are missing. We only drive Hondas, one is a 2006! WE don't take splashy vacations or wear name brands, etc. But--colleges have us on the hook for the full freight...even though we are scrimping and saving just as much as you. We only had 2 kids and live frugally. WE do have lots of retirement savings and paid down our mortgage as a priority...we also were funding the 529s since birth. AND if we only had to pay $30k like you--they would be able to attend the Ivies and SLACs that their hard work with no hooks got them into....but they are part of the donut hole class which is REAL no matter how much you people getting $60k discounts think it isn't.

+1 lol at the ^PP who thinks they did it right by getting FA.

Excuse us, but we saved, too, and can afford $50/yr, but we are a donuthole family who gets zilch. We can easily float in state, and maybe cheaper oos, but not the $90K/yr school that ^PP's kid is going to. We also have more than one kid.

There aren't that many great in state options where we are, so even if we look oos, we are restricted to a small number of decent schools for $50K/year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The people congratulating themselves for sacrificing while judging others without knowing anything about their circumstances is cracking me up. OK you love your kids more than we do because you drove the same car for 10 years.

Here's what the sanctimonious self-sacrificing crowd doesn't get. There are those of us who think that YOU'RE foolish to pay 85K per year for college. It doesn't make financial sense in most cases. You're obsessed with the "best" schools when most research shows that kids going to good publics do just as well. So there are those of us who think, unless you're wealthy, it's foolish to save for 85K a year when you can get the same quality for 40K per year. We're not as into prestige and we're certainly not paying for it. So just know as you're judging us, we're also looking at your values with some critical questions....

Sorry for my tone, but the judgment assuming those who haven't saved for 85K per year are just selfishly splurging.... it's so far from how many of us approach this.

Most of us aren't "congratulateing ourselves" and are middle class, so, we actually get some aid.

The big issue many if us have is hearing those who didn't save complain. Totally fine for you to cashflow a 40k school, but don't complain that you should somehow get a discount at a 90k school.

We scrimp and save to afford the COA of 30k at the 90k school after FA. We could have stretched to 40k, but thank goodness got great aid.

Fantastic but you are paying 60K less than many that also scrimped and saved. The extra $60k is A LOT. That is what you people are missing. We only drive Hondas, one is a 2006! WE don't take splashy vacations or wear name brands, etc. But--colleges have us on the hook for the full freight...even though we are scrimping and saving just as much as you. We only had 2 kids and live frugally. WE do have lots of retirement savings and paid down our mortgage as a priority...we also were funding the 529s since birth. AND if we only had to pay $30k like you--they would be able to attend the Ivies and SLACs that their hard work with no hooks got them into....but they are part of the donut hole class which is REAL no matter how much you people getting $60k discounts think it isn't.

Most likely you are MUCH better set for retirement savings than the person making slightly less than you who is getting "60K" to attend an elite college. They scrimped and saved and likely didn't pay down the mortgage and didn't save enough for retirement and lived with even less for the last 20 years.

Ironically, most of you are complaining about paying for schools that your kid most likely wont even gain admission to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The people congratulating themselves for sacrificing while judging others without knowing anything about their circumstances is cracking me up. OK you love your kids more than we do because you drove the same car for 10 years.

Here's what the sanctimonious self-sacrificing crowd doesn't get. There are those of us who think that YOU'RE foolish to pay 85K per year for college. It doesn't make financial sense in most cases. You're obsessed with the "best" schools when most research shows that kids going to good publics do just as well. So there are those of us who think, unless you're wealthy, it's foolish to save for 85K a year when you can get the same quality for 40K per year. We're not as into prestige and we're certainly not paying for it. So just know as you're judging us, we're also looking at your values with some critical questions....

Sorry for my tone, but the judgment assuming those who haven't saved for 85K per year are just selfishly splurging.... it's so far from how many of us approach this.

Most of us aren't "congratulateing ourselves" and are middle class, so, we actually get some aid.

The big issue many if us have is hearing those who didn't save complain. Totally fine for you to cashflow a 40k school, but don't complain that you should somehow get a discount at a 90k school.

We scrimp and save to afford the COA of 30k at the 90k school after FA. We could have stretched to 40k, but thank goodness got great aid.

You aren't middle class. Middle class don't have $30-40K a year for college.