Another Form Of Job Creep??

[Anonymous]

I would not put a 5yo in a stroller but going to a park and wearing out both kids sounds ideal. It’s probably a 25-30 min walk each way? This is part of your job. Much easier than being in the house with 2 working parents. I would take the stroller because you can pack snacks, jackets etc in it and put the 3yo in it if necessary.

[Anonymous]

OP Here >>>
Yikes! It’s a good thing I have thick (leather!) skin because these responses are a little harsh.
Lol.

Anyway, I am not permitted to drive the children. The parents do not let anyone, including grandparents as well as their former daycare providers to drive them. They admit it is a weird quirk, but it is their right.
When I asked my MB if the five year old can walk when I get to the hill, she was very clear that BOTH kids would be tuckered out from playing at the park and that they both were to be pushed home.
I could always make the five year old walk, but my MB probably would not be too happy if I didn’t respect her wishes.
The girls run in the parent’s home office so quickly.
They will be with me, then one will get up and simply zoom (no pun intended) into the office room. I have told the girls not to disturb the parents, yet they do not listen to me and continue to run inside. When I brought up the issue with the parents they said that I would have to use force if necessary but I cannot do so. When if I leave a bruise or mark on their arm? It is a slippery slope.

I have tried incentives like stickers if they listen, timeouts when they do not but nothing works. The kids just do not listen to me. I wish the parents would simply lock the door, that way I can get to the child before she goes inside!
Due to COVID-19, the parents do not want their girls to touch or play on the parks play equipment, they want the girls to stay in the grass and play ball or frisbee which sounds ideal. But since the girls do not listen to me at all, I told the parents that if they do not do what I say and play on the equipment then I simply cannot use physical force to get them off.
I will tell them we are going home and will not be returning back until they can respect me.
The parents do not like this idea, but I feel it is how kids learn.

The park is actually 2.5 miles from the house. I just checked it on Google maps. So about five miles round trip. I love to walk so the distance is okay.
It’s just that darn steep hill on the way back.
Man I wish I could post a pic.
Thank you for your input.

[Anonymous]

I think you need a different job. With kids this age you do sometimes have to use physical force. I am not talking about hurting them or being violent, but picking them up and moving them to a different area or physically blocking them from leaving the room they are supposed to be in. The fact that you have no strategies other than bribing them or giving up tells me you are probably not experienced.

At the same time, this family seems kind of high-maintenance and controlling. You would probably be more successful with a more flexible family who has a baby and no big kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think you need a different job. With kids this age you do sometimes have to use physical force. I am not talking about hurting them or being violent, but picking them up and moving them to a different area or physically blocking them from leaving the room they are supposed to be in. The fact that you have no strategies other than bribing them or giving up tells me you are probably not experienced.

At the same time, this family seems kind of high-maintenance and controlling. You would probably be more successful with a more flexible family who has a baby and no big kids.

-1
I absolutely disagree w/the above answer.
Using physical force on a child that does not belong to you is just asking for trouble.

If you put your hands on someone else’s child, however benignly then you are opening up a can of worms.
If a child resists & twists and turns, then you can leave red marks.
And w/kids that young - they will tell other adults that you used force, embellishing the truth as kids are known to do.

I used to work in a preschool and during our training/orientation we were clearly instructed never to use force on any of our students.
Too much liability involved.

It is up to the parents to get their kids to listen ➕ obey other adults.
If they cannot do so then this is on the parents, not the Nanny or babysitter.
No exceptions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP Here >>>
Yikes! It’s a good thing I have thick (leather!) skin because these responses are a little harsh.
Lol.

Anyway, I am not permitted to drive the children. The parents do not let anyone, including grandparents as well as their former daycare providers to drive them. They admit it is a weird quirk, but it is their right.
When I asked my MB if the five year old can walk when I get to the hill, she was very clear that BOTH kids would be tuckered out from playing at the park and that they both were to be pushed home.
I could always make the five year old walk, but my MB probably would not be too happy if I didn’t respect her wishes.
The girls run in the parent’s home office so quickly.
They will be with me, then one will get up and simply zoom (no pun intended) into the office room. I have told the girls not to disturb the parents, yet they do not listen to me and continue to run inside. When I brought up the issue with the parents they said that I would have to use force if necessary but I cannot do so. When if I leave a bruise or mark on their arm? It is a slippery slope.

I have tried incentives like stickers if they listen, timeouts when they do not but nothing works. The kids just do not listen to me. I wish the parents would simply lock the door, that way I can get to the child before she goes inside!
Due to COVID-19, the parents do not want their girls to touch or play on the parks play equipment, they want the girls to stay in the grass and play ball or frisbee which sounds ideal. But since the girls do not listen to me at all, I told the parents that if they do not do what I say and play on the equipment then I simply cannot use physical force to get them off.
I will tell them we are going home and will not be returning back until they can respect me.
The parents do not like this idea, but I feel it is how kids learn.

The park is actually 2.5 miles from the house. I just checked it on Google maps. So about five miles round trip. I love to walk so the distance is okay.
It’s just that darn steep hill on the way back.
Man I wish I could post a pic.
Thank you for your input.

They sound unrealistic and kind of crazy. As a person who lives on top of a steep hill and has pushed a 1 and 3 year old up in a double stroller - no way would I want to do that with a 3 and 5 year old at the end of a 5 mile round trip! Do they seriously do that themselves or only demand it of the help?

[Anonymous]

^^^^Many parents ask their Nannies to do certain things that they would likely not do.

I have had families tell me no screen time at all while I am there - then as soon as I leave the iPads + T.V. sets come on.
They are also always on when I arrive most mornings.

I also have had parents ask me to push strollers up hills...though no parent has ever asked me to push a five yr. old in a stroller.
That is ridiculous and would be a dealbreaker.

Kids three and under only.
No strollers for over three.

[Anonymous]

Unlike most of the posters here, I don’t think you are lazy. That’s a long walk pushing a heavy stroller everyday just bc the parents don’t want to lock the door. Personally, I’d quit and I would tell them why. They are too restrictive and unrealistic in their demands. Not touching the park equipment?! So the kids are suppose to watch other kids have fun at the park while they throw a frisbee?! Yeah, they sounds like so much more fun than climbing, swings and slides for a 3 and 5 year old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^^^^Many parents ask their Nannies to do certain things that they would likely not do.

I have had families tell me no screen time at all while I am there - then as soon as I leave the iPads + T.V. sets come on.
They are also always on when I arrive most mornings.

I also have had parents ask me to push strollers up hills...though no parent has ever asked me to push a five yr. old in a stroller.
That is ridiculous and would be a dealbreaker.

Kids three and under only.
No strollers for over three.

Totally agree.

Except I say no stroller for 3 and over. I make my 3 year old charges walk unless we are on metro. Everyone comes home exhausted and ready for a nap.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Unlike most of the posters here, I don’t think you are lazy. That’s a long walk pushing a heavy stroller everyday just bc the parents don’t want to lock the door. Personally, I’d quit and I would tell them why. They are too restrictive and unrealistic in their demands. Not touching the park equipment?! So the kids are suppose to watch other kids have fun at the park while they throw a frisbee?! Yeah, they sounds like so much more fun than climbing, swings and slides for a 3 and 5 year old.

OP Here:
Thank you PP.
😃

[Anonymous]

I don't think you're lazy. I'm a nanny and have never been asked to walk to a park a mile away. With a stroller, that's to much.

I'm not sure why the parents won't lock the doors. Simple thing to do. Ask them.

[Anonymous]

Do they have a nice yard you can play in if you don't want to walk to the park? My daycare does 3-4 hours of outside play a day and that's why I and all the other parents chose it. I wouldn't be okay with only inside play. On lovely days, they are outside the entire day and even eat outside (everything but naps). We are expected to send the kids in appropriate weather gear.

My backup sitter guarantees 2.5 hours outside a day when she comes. They chalk sidewalks, find bugs, go on long adventure walks, etc. I'm sure your employer doesn't care about you going to that particular park, she just wants more outdoor time.

[Anonymous]

1. Kids walk. I wear kids who are infants and young toddlers. Starting at 2, they walk and I carry them for short distances to give them a break. 3+ walk.
2. Take a potty chair in the backyard and lock the back door. They can play without running inside, and they have bathroom facilities.
3. Use baby gates that have to be moved, instead of just opened. Block off the inside area in which they can play, leaving no access to the offices.

Or quit and tell them why.