Do you separate snacks per child?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The dynamic you're suggesting sounds off, OP. Why do the kids have so much interest in the number of each snack in the common pantry?

I don't mean this unkindly but the nexus of sibling rivalry usually comes from the children's perceptions of how one/both parent/s treat the children differently, with one child being more favored. I think you should examine how you may have (unwittingly) contributed to your kids' perceptions that the number of snacks reflects how you feel about each of them.

Sorry, disagree with all of this, this is totally normal kid behavior and not some kind of parenting mistake on OP's part. We could all be perfect parents and siblings would still find something to bicker about.

That said, OP, I agree with the other PPs that this doesn't need to be your problem. Let them negotiate a fair system between the 2 or stop buying whatever they bicker over.

[Anonymous]

I think its nice they are trying to be fair. Growing up, if I wanted anything I'd have to hide it. Or, my parents would always side with my sibling even if she was wrong.

[Anonymous]

I have one snack “bucket” (plastic bin from Target) but in your situation I would 100% get one per kid.

[Anonymous]

OK, I'm going to dissent here. I grew up with two siblings and parents who couldn't be bothered with us, either. They would buy a certain number of sodas and treats each week and tell us how many we were allowed to have. Every week my brother would steal mine. I would ask my parents for help, they didn't want to deal with it. I would ask him to stop and try to solve it on my own, but there really wasn't anything I could do (I even tried hiding things in my room once and he complained, that I had hidden to food he wanted to steal, and then I got in trouble.)

My sister use to take my clothes that I paid for and then lie about it, then hit me when I tried to find my things in her room (she confessed years later that she had even thrown some things away, just to be mean to me). Again, I asked my parents for help and they didn't want to deal with it. I eventually bought a lock for my closet door and got in trouble for installing it, but because my parents were so passive beyond telling us to shut up, they never took the lock off so I used it.

So, my advice, don't be lazy, OP. Your kids are having a conflict they are having trouble solving on their own. Sit down with them and help them. Ask them what it will take. No more snacks? limits on snacks? Separate bins for snacks? More snacks? Make a plan and let them try it out. If one of them is following the rules and the other is not, parent that child. Don't make it your other kid's problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe ask them if they want to divvy up the snacks. And if they want to, buy them binds (they are 9 and 12 not teenagers).

I am all for letting kids work thing out, but I know if my son is worried about eating his share of something like cookies, he might eat too many out of fear they will be gone. But if I tell him he can put a few in a container and label then his, he will not overeat.

+1

[Anonymous]

I can imagine that there would be a few rarely bought items that could be divided and stored seperately but most things no. There are plenty of granola bars in the house. Oh did you miss out on the honey oat? Remind me to pick up another box next week.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I usually shop a few different stores off instacart, so I stock up on items cheaper at certain stores. Which means I might have 4 boxes of favorite granola bars from one order or 4 boxes of mini muffins from another.

Recently my kids (12 and 9) have started counting servings of packages and arguing over who had more servings for all items. It's annoying AF and i can't deal with it. I'm considering getting them each their own boxes of everything and they have that amount and that's it. Maybe I just give them their own box of stuff in the pantry?

Any advice is appreciated

No. They don’t have too many overlapping snacks. The girl loves salty, savory things except nuts unless it’s in chocolate. The boy loves sweet things except caramel. The things they both devour are produce and dairy at an alarming rate. Sounds like su should be grateful they aren’t fighting over mini muffins.

[Anonymous]

From Mott Children's Hospital (U of Michigan)
www.mottchildren.org/posts/your-child/sibling-rivalry#:~:text=There%20are%20many%20factors%20that%20contribute%20to%20sibling,threatened%20by%20the%20arrival%20of%20a%20new%20baby

From Grow by WebMD
www.webmd.com/parenting/sibling-rivalry#1

[Anonymous]

I can’t handle the arguments over food and who ate the last of what. DH gets blamed half of the time anyway. I can’t police their food at this age. I ignore it all but also don’t run out to replenish if they are fighting over something. That should have stopped 5 years ago and COVID is making us all crazy. They are snacking more through class too.