How self sufficient is your 12-14 year old?

[Anonymous]

13 DS cooks for himself fairly well and keeps his room quite tidy without being asked. If I want him to clean the kitchen or elsewhere in the house or work in the yard, that's an explicit ask. Needs reminders on laundry and tooth brushing (omg!), but will get it done.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How much can your young teen do by themselves? How much do they actually do without being asked/forced?

-shave themselves?
-do laundry?
-clean the house (how much/how often)?
-clean their room?
-go to a store/cafe?
-yard work?
-cook? How much/often?
-bake?

I’m trying to encourage my ASD kid to be more independent, but being my oldest, I’m trying to find realistic expectations.

Mine has HFA too. He can shave himself, but my husband supervises. He does laundry with supervision. He keeps his room neat, but does a lousy job making his bed. I don't have him cleaning. I could totally see him spraying himself in the eyes by accident or rubbing his eyes after touching something with bleach. I need to work on it eventually. He is a disaster ordering food or paying for something and just too nervous to make sure he gets the right change. I need to practice post pandemic during a time when few people are around. He can't cook. I have him peel and chop a little (no onions), but still use kids safe chef knives to chop at his request. He can't bake and has no common sense about how not to make a mess. No yardwork.

I am absolutely thrilled he gets up on time for online school, gets his breakfast and shows up to class on time without me pushing at all. I hear some neurotypical kids struggle with this. Also, to be honest it was a big victory when he started clipping his own nails. He used to have so many sensory issues and he just hated the feeling and sound.

[Anonymous]

Mine can do all of that except yard work but does need to be reminded a lot. She is 13.