Amazing things your parents have done.

[Anonymous]

What an inspiring thread; thanks for getting it started, OP. My parents immigrated to the US, leaving behind their language, culture, family and friends. Their determination and adventurous spirit amazes me, even when they drive me nuts. My in-laws reared 6 boys and accepted each one for his own unique self, never making comparisons -- at least none that DH or his brothers ever knew about. Finally, all 4 are doting grandparents who take a real interest in their grandkids. Really, that alone would be enough for me to love them all.

[Anonymous]

My mother came to the US from a South Asian country when she was 32 with literally a suitcase of belongings and me. Divorce was heavily frowned upon in our country of origin so she came here to provide me with a better life and more opportunities.

She often worked 3 jobs at a time doing menial work even though she had an advanced degree. My mother always believed that educating me in this country would provide me with a exit route from the struggles she had to endure.

Through her sheer determination she managed to provide me with a world class education and I was able to attend a prestigious university and law school. My law school graduation was probably one of the happiest days of her life.

I am now happily married to an amazing man and we have a young toddler at home. Sometimes when I have a spare moment for reflection, I am truly in awe of how she was able to provide me with so many opportunities on such a limited income. I don't know if I would have the strength to lead the life that she did.

[Anonymous]

My mother lost her dad at 21, and had to go get her brother, 14, at camp and tell him their dad was dead. It was 1963. My grandmother had never worked outside the home. They had no insurance. Mom told tales of going through their father's pants pocket for change for groceries. Already the first in her family to go to college against her late father's wishes (he didn't see the point in a girl going), sand already working part time to afford school, she thought she would have to drop out and work to support her family. Her church said "oh no," and collected money to keep her in school.

She finished and taught in the public schools in Chicago until and sometime after marrying my dad. She then stayed home and out of the workforce for 20 years to raise me and my brother. This didn't make her happy at all, and my parents, though they are good people, had a terribly unhappy marriage.

At 50, my mother got a masters degree in fine art, and went back to teaching. She and my dad eventually divorced. I can't even begin to tell you what a powerful lesson this was to see. Our stories don't end at 20, 30, 40, 50.

[Anonymous]

"My mother raised 8 kids and never complained, not once."

I like her.

"Our stories don't end at 20, 30, 40, 50." AMEN!

[Anonymous]

When I was 11, my mother quit her job to take care of my father, who was diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor at 40. After the tumor was removed, which was the size of a softball, she lovingly cared for me (11 yrs. old), a 8 yr old son, a 4 yr old daughter, and her husband who now had the cognitive abilities of a 3 yr old.

When he died 2 yrs. later, she used what little savings she had to provide us with therapy and counseling to make sure we were emotionally healthy. We never knew that we had gone from being an average middle class family to living in poverty.

Four years after my father's death my mother remarried. After 5 years of remarriage, she discovered (via a chain of emails) that her husband was gay, and had been lying and cheating on her with men he solicited from the internet.

She hired a detective, an out-of-state lawyer, set up an PO Box, and built up a case against him over the course of several months. She did all of this in secret, out of fear that if he discovered what she had learned that he would try to physically harm her/run away with money/blackmail. She presented the divorce papers to him at work, and later that day two of my uncles delivered all of his things to his office. Within 12 hrs, she had removed everything that belonged to him. Due to her diligent work with the lawyer, they did not go to trial and he literally ran away with his tail between he legs and we've never heard from him again.

Despite the pain that she had suffered in her own love life, she is the most loving women and amazing mother and grandmother that I can imagine. And the most amazing part is that she hasn't given up on finding love, but in the meantime has returned to school to start a second career after raising her own children.

[Anonymous]

my mom is one among 15 children - bio mom didn't raise 1 of them. her bio mom never really fed her. gave her away to the neighbor because they asked her to have the baby. she was malnourished and ill. the adoptive parents fell ill when mom was 7yo - mom had cancer and diabetes, dad had a heart attack. they could not care for her anymore she was put in boarding school. she got locked in a elevator alone when she was 4 yo - she developed serious claustrophobia from that. they tied her hand to make her a right handed person. potty training for night accidents was making the child who peed at night walk around all day with the peed sheets on their heads. she didn't know how to wash her privates and one day a teacher made fun of her for being stinking in front of the entire class. she stayed boarded there until age 14 when she begged to come home and promised to get a job. she fulfilled her promise and never stopped working to this day. during life she supported both, her bio and adoptive parents both financially and emotionally. I have clear memories of visiting all of them and bragged to friends the fact that I had 3 sets of grandparents. it was amazing the love and dedication my mom showed towards all of them. even after all she went through she grew up to be a very stable, loving, equilibrated, beautiful woman. we brought adoptive grandpa to live with us when he could not care for himself anymore and he stayed with us until he passed - at 91 with alzheimer, osteoporosis and renal complications. I have wonderful memories of this time. his stories about the wars he fought, going through old journals he and grandma wrote, looking at old pictures and eating his whole wheat bread made from scratch. my mom was a wohm and feels guilty for "not being there for us" and i cry out talking to her telling her i know she did what was the best for us and i tell her that i love her for not being a sahm. it doesn't change how i feel for her. she started her career as a xerox girl in an office and through the years she made to CEO. later in life mom and dad gave up everything to start their own business and due to some bad decisions they lost everything they had, to the point that we were eating dinner with nothing to eat for b-fast next day.
creditors took all we had, properties, cars, home, appliances, furniture. everything! we were for years with no electricity or phone. they were in an age that back home is considered too old to get a job so mom became a bag carrier in a grocery store for tips and dad went to the farms around and offered to be a milk delivery man.
since then they're trying to pay their debts and trying to rebuild their lives. through out all this my parents taught us to never give up. faith is the base of all and never let go, pursue our dreams and making mistakes is OK. just be strong enough to go around what goes wrogn and start over, always. while this was all going on we finished HS, went to college and graduated. we were paying for our tuition with our own money and they never ever asked us for one dime.

now if i tell you the story from my dad's side we'll have write a book...

[Anonymous]

My mom could drink every single one of you losers under the table.

[Anonymous]

LOL-mine too, even at 83!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mother survived a rape and continued the resulting pregnancy, having and raising the baby. Even when everyone turned their back on her because they thought the baby was from infidelity.

My father raised the baby, my sister, as his own. Even when everyone criticized him because they didn't know the circumstances.

Now that is awesome. You have seriously strong parents.

[Anonymous]

I'm still pretty honored that my dad, a Viet Nam-era fighter pilot did a "victory roll" in his fighter jet over Mt. McKinley (as it was called then) when I was born.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mom could drink every single one of you losers under the table.

Hope she didn't do so while you were inside.