Lived off trust fund and now my career sucks

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am 34 year olds and have a small trust fund that gives me a monthly amount to live on. It’s enough to wear I can rent a good apartment in an urban area, pay my bills and groceries and have some left over, go out for the occasional dinner and save up for occasional vacations (not super often though)

Because of my trust, I’ve been able to not rely on working a 9-5 job. So my work history is peppered with jobs I started by left after 6 months (or 2 months) and then long stretches of not working. I have a college degree, but it’s in dance- hardly useful for getting an office job.

I am smart, believe it or not, and always tested very highly. My friends joke that I would make a better president of a company than the low level positions I have been working at. But obviously you have to stick it out at the job in order to get to higher positions, which I have not done so far. Or have the money to start your own company, which my trust does not allow for.

Now that I’m in my mid 30s, living off a trust fund does not seem as cool as it did in my 20s when lots of people were struggling to pay for their small shared apartments. Now I’m starting to see my peers make bigger salaries, go on way better vacations, buy houses, etc- stuff that I can’t do because I don’t have the income. And I know it’s just going to get worse as people move on and their salaries continue to grow with age.

So I guess my question is- does anyone have any advice about the best thing to do? I was always good in liberal arts fields- writing, history- but I know these fields are hard to break into. I'm starting to feel extremely bored with my life and aimless, like there's no point, and I'd like to have a career I'm passionate about where ideally I can also make a lot of money and afford the luxuries I grew up with. Any advice would be welcome.

Get over yourself, and seriously what a weird thing for your friends to say.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am 34 year olds and have a small trust fund that gives me a monthly amount to live on. It’s enough to wear I can rent a good apartment in an urban area, pay my bills and groceries and have some left over, go out for the occasional dinner and save up for occasional vacations (not super often though)

Because of my trust, I’ve been able to not rely on working a 9-5 job. So my work history is peppered with jobs I started by left after 6 months (or 2 months) and then long stretches of not working. I have a college degree, but it’s in dance- hardly useful for getting an office job.

I am smart, believe it or not, and always tested very highly. My friends joke that I would make a better president of a company than the low level positions I have been working at. But obviously you have to stick it out at the job in order to get to higher positions, which I have not done so far. Or have the money to start your own company, which my trust does not allow for.

Now that I’m in my mid 30s, living off a trust fund does not seem as cool as it did in my 20s when lots of people were struggling to pay for their small shared apartments. Now I’m starting to see my peers make bigger salaries, go on way better vacations, buy houses, etc- stuff that I can’t do because I don’t have the income. And I know it’s just going to get worse as people move on and their salaries continue to grow with age.

So I guess my question is- does anyone have any advice about the best thing to do? I was always good in liberal arts fields- writing, history- but I know these fields are hard to break into. I'm starting to feel extremely bored with my life and aimless, like there's no point, and I'd like to have a career I'm passionate about where ideally I can also make a lot of money and afford the luxuries I grew up with. Any advice would be welcome.

you've had this income for over a decade, you could have bought a house at any time, anywhere. most of us live where we do to commute to work, you could have bought a house in denver or austin years ago and made mad appreciation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:+1 starting a business, law school, +1 MBA

Forgot to add that these all require a lot of hard work, focus, and often financial investment--as you probably know. It's a good idea to make sure that your ADHD is treated well first if you choose any of these paths.

FWIW I'm very good at focusing on things that interest me and that I care about. I tested extremely highly and have generally done well in school, although I tended to be a slacker and didn't work that hard. So, I think I could handle the workload, I guess I just wonder if that's the right path or if it's too late, at my age, to start something like this. I've considered law school but have heard lawyers dont make much money, and not sure what I would study in business school, but I have been considering them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Also, do you have ADHD? If you're bright but have trouble holding down a job, that screams ADHD to me. Read up on the different types of ADHD.

Yeah I do. But not really sure what the solution is. I decided to go off my medication because of health risks and I was sick of being wired on adderall 24/7. Things weren't ideal before that either. I am really bad at small tasks like organization but again I have to get through those tasks to get promoted up to more strategic/higher thinking ones, so it seems like a catch 22.

The process is not just arbitrary hoops. You have to learn a lot of useful skills b sticking with those tasks and building on them. Highly relevantly, one bsic one is how to deal with boredom or irritability with your co-workers without quitting in 2-6 months.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:+1 starting a business, law school, +1 MBA

Forgot to add that these all require a lot of hard work, focus, and often financial investment--as you probably know. It's a good idea to make sure that your ADHD is treated well first if you choose any of these paths.

FWIW I'm very good at focusing on things that interest me and that I care about. I tested extremely highly and have generally done well in school, although I tended to be a slacker and didn't work that hard. So, I think I could handle the workload, I guess I just wonder if that's the right path or if it's too late, at my age, to start something like this. I've considered law school but have heard lawyers dont make much money, and not sure what I would study in business school, but I have been considering them.

Most people are. (?)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:+1 starting a business, law school, +1 MBA

Forgot to add that these all require a lot of hard work, focus, and often financial investment--as you probably know. It's a good idea to make sure that your ADHD is treated well first if you choose any of these paths.

FWIW I'm very good at focusing on things that interest me and that I care about. I tested extremely highly and have generally done well in school, although I tended to be a slacker and didn't work that hard. So, I think I could handle the workload, I guess I just wonder if that's the right path or if it's too late, at my age, to start something like this. I've considered law school but have heard lawyers dont make much money, and not sure what I would study in business school, but I have been considering them.

Most people are. (?)

It's more pronounced in people with ADD or ADHD.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:+1 starting a business, law school, +1 MBA

Forgot to add that these all require a lot of hard work, focus, and often financial investment--as you probably know. It's a good idea to make sure that your ADHD is treated well first if you choose any of these paths.

FWIW I'm very good at focusing on things that interest me and that I care about. I tested extremely highly and have generally done well in school, although I tended to be a slacker and didn't work that hard. So, I think I could handle the workload, I guess I just wonder if that's the right path or if it's too late, at my age, to start something like this. I've considered law school but have heard lawyers dont make much money, and not sure what I would study in business school, but I have been considering them.

Most people are. (?)

It's more pronounced in people with ADD or ADHD.

Sure. It's also not in itself an overall plus for any job. Most jobs -- and yes, even senior ones -- require you to do things that doing interest you and/or that you don't care about. Finding it easy and enjoyable to do the parts you like is almost a tautology.

I think you've got two options, both valid. One is to accept that this is the way it's going to be, and find some peace and joy in the positives. The other is to accept that you can't be happy or fulfilled like this but will need to do things that don't interest you and that you don't care about to get further ahead, and it will probably be painful -- but there isn't a cheat code (i.e., some magical job or training track) to get around that.

[Anonymous]

^^"don't interest you"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:+1 starting a business, law school, +1 MBA

Forgot to add that these all require a lot of hard work, focus, and often financial investment--as you probably know. It's a good idea to make sure that your ADHD is treated well first if you choose any of these paths.

FWIW I'm very good at focusing on things that interest me and that I care about. I tested extremely highly and have generally done well in school, although I tended to be a slacker and didn't work that hard. So, I think I could handle the workload, I guess I just wonder if that's the right path or if it's too late, at my age, to start something like this. I've considered law school but have heard lawyers dont make much money, and not sure what I would study in business school, but I have been considering them.

Most people are. (?)

It's more pronounced in people with ADD or ADHD.

Sure. It's also not in itself an overall plus for any job. Most jobs -- and yes, even senior ones -- require you to do things that doing interest you and/or that you don't care about. Finding it easy and enjoyable to do the parts you like is almost a tautology.

I think you've got two options, both valid. One is to accept that this is the way it's going to be, and find some peace and joy in the positives. The other is to accept that you can't be happy or fulfilled like this but will need to do things that don't interest you and that you don't care about to get further ahead, and it will probably be painful -- but there isn't a cheat code (i.e., some magical job or training track) to get around that.

Right. And I totally accept that I will have to do some of that in each job. Of course that's life. I think that it's just hard for me to do jobs where that's basically 100% of the job,i.e. the lowest level of entry level business jobs, where it's a lot of paperwork and phone answering etc, with 0% or 5% of things that interest me. Unfortunately I recognize you usually have to get through this period to get to the level where you're paid to do upper level thinking, but because I'm ADHD it makes it very difficult for me to bear doing these totally boring tasks, with hardly any "strategic" parts of the brain activated. I guess one of the questions I have is if it's possible to find an entry level job where I can switch to that more strategic thinking immediately, rather than the menial paperwork type jobs which I think I'm uniquely ill suited for.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:+1 starting a business, law school, +1 MBA

Forgot to add that these all require a lot of hard work, focus, and often financial investment--as you probably know. It's a good idea to make sure that your ADHD is treated well first if you choose any of these paths.

Whatevs. I have untreated ADHD and am higy successful in one of these fields. You have to fund something that interests you to the exclusion of everything else. Hyper focus like hell, kick ass.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:+1 starting a business, law school, +1 MBA

Forgot to add that these all require a lot of hard work, focus, and often financial investment--as you probably know. It's a good idea to make sure that your ADHD is treated well first if you choose any of these paths.

Whatevs. I have untreated ADHD and am higy successful in one of these fields. You have to fund something that interests you to the exclusion of everything else. Hyper focus like hell, kick ass.

OP here. Thanks, this is my instinct. Generally I'm quite good and quick at subjects I find interesting. I just feel like I totally missed the boat on finding out what that is and now am trying to find direction. I have no doubt i'll be able to do that prototypical ADHD hyperfocusing when I find it, and "kick ass", but just really having a hard locating whatever it is. But I really appreciate the inspiration and words of encouragement- good to see ADHD people doing awesome!

[Anonymous]

I get that it's frustrating, but entry level positions are almost all "menial." If they were exciting and interesting, you'd be competing against people with more experience and training for them.

And I do mean to say this gently, but with your current work history as related here, it's going to be hard to convince a hiring manager that any ability you have to excel at more interesting and fulfilling jobs is worth the risk that you'll get bored or frustrated and quit -- because literally every job comes with that risk. You [ui]think[/i] that if you could leapfrog a step or two, you could handle it and stay, but that's kind of magical thinking. Neither you nor anyone else has any reason to think that, and it's a lot of chance to take when there are people who can both do well at the more cool jobs and have proven they can stick it out when things aren't as awesome.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:+1 starting a business, law school, +1 MBA

Forgot to add that these all require a lot of hard work, focus, and often financial investment--as you probably know. It's a good idea to make sure that your ADHD is treated well first if you choose any of these paths.

Whatevs. I have untreated ADHD and am higy successful in one of these fields. You have to fund something that interests you to the exclusion of everything else. Hyper focus like hell, kick ass.

OP here. Thanks, this is my instinct. Generally I'm quite good and quick at subjects I find interesting. I just feel like I totally missed the boat on finding out what that is and now am trying to find direction. I have no doubt i'll be able to do that prototypical ADHD hyperfocusing when I find it, and "kick ass", but just really having a hard locating whatever it is. But I really appreciate the inspiration and words of encouragement- good to see ADHD people doing awesome!

Fair enough. It sounds like this is the answer you were looking for, so I'll bow out and wish you well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I get that it's frustrating, but entry level positions are almost all "menial." If they were exciting and interesting, you'd be competing against people with more experience and training for them.

And I do mean to say this gently, but with your current work history as related here, it's going to be hard to convince a hiring manager that any ability you have to excel at more interesting and fulfilling jobs is worth the risk that you'll get bored or frustrated and quit -- because literally every job comes with that risk. You [ui]think[/i] that if you could leapfrog a step or two, you could handle it and stay, but that's kind of magical thinking. Neither you nor anyone else has any reason to think that, and it's a lot of chance to take when there are people who can both do well at the more cool jobs and have proven they can stick it out when things aren't as awesome.

Yeah, I totally get that people would think that, especially hiring managers. I guess that's why I say it's a catch22, and I was hoping to float out the situation and see if anyone has any ideas for a solution that I havent been able to think of. Obviously it's not an ideal situation, to say the least. But I'm hopeful that I can change it or improve it

[Anonymous]

I do wish you well!