Parents, how much free time do you have

[Anonymous]

Free time = anything before 6:30 am during the week, after which either the dogs or the kids need taking care of (my husband and I alternate) and after 7:30 pm when kids go to bed, plus time on the weekends, at least a few hours a day. Kids are in school from 7:30 (when carpool leaves) until they get home at 4 (except for the two days a week I pick them up and take them to their afternoon sport). I work generally from 7:30-5:30, less on the two days I pick them up from school, but that doesn't include about an hour-long lunch with my husband (we both work from home now), plus at least some time during the day for laundry or other quick things around the house. And of course the 15 minutes I spend on DCUM while I eat my breakfast in the mornings.

So if you are asking how much time I have purely for myself to do whatever I want, then I'd say between 0-60 minutes in the mornings, depending on how much before 6:30 I wake up, and at least two hours at night after the kids go to bed. On the weekends it varies depending on what we're doing, but I have more time in the morning if I'm doing the kids because they don't get up at 6:30 on Saturday or Sunday and the same time at night because they don't stay up later on the weekends, plus a few hours each day when we all disperse and go our separate ways. Kids are six (twins).

[Anonymous]

Despite working from home and no camp/
nor in-person school, I definitely had a little free time here and there... until my husband had to leave the country (family emergency). Now... I can check Twitter/etc briefly early in the morning and squeeze in 5 minutes of peace throughout the day, but any sort of real free time is not happening. Even when my kid is asleep I am mostly just doing household things I didn't have time for during the day.

[Anonymous]

I have a couple hours a day just for myself. I work 38 to 40 hours a week and have a great nanny who works 40 hours. DH and I tag team the kids to make sure we get complete downtime/ free time every day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a couple hours a day just for myself. I work 38 to 40 hours a week and have a great nanny who works 40 hours. DH and I tag team the kids to make sure we get complete downtime/ free time every day.

That's awesome!
How do you do this? DH and I got into a huge fight a few months ago, and I left the house whenever he was home every day for 3-4 weeks and came back at bedtime. It was really wonderful except that I started to worry my marriage was falling apart. I talked to old friends, read, took on a short additional project at work, and started jogging and kayaking. I was sad to give up my time alone after we made up.

How do you two work out this schedule? Do you eat meals together? Play games together with the kids?

[Anonymous]

Have a 1 and 3 year old. Free time usually from 815-10pm. I just watch tv

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Currently none. I wake up at 8, start working. Work until 5pm when my kids come home from daycare (dh takes them). We eat dinner and hang out together. After they go to sleep at 8pm, I log on for another 3 hours of work. I dream about reading a book, but zero time...

Pre-pandemic I had several hours a day to myself.

I don't understand...how you lost your free time if your kids are in daycare.

Sounds like her job got busier.

Yes. Job got busier and there's just less separation between work and home. I really don't have any time. Maybe on weekends but those are all about the kids and during nap time I do laundry and clean.

[Anonymous]

Only if DH watches the kids. ES kids doing DL while I work at home (DH works at office).

[Anonymous]

I work full time. Probably have about three hours a day during the weekdays of free time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Currently none. I wake up at 8, start working. Work until 5pm when my kids come home from daycare (dh takes them). We eat dinner and hang out together. After they go to sleep at 8pm, I log on for another 3 hours of work. I dream about reading a book, but zero time...

Pre-pandemic I had several hours a day to myself.

I don't understand...how you lost your free time if your kids are in daycare.

Sounds like her job got busier.

Yes. Job got busier and there's just less separation between work and home. I really don't have any time. Maybe on weekends but those are all about the kids and during nap time I do laundry and clean.

THIS! It used to be so much easier to get away from all the things that needed to be done around the house when I could just escape to my office. Now it all just stares at me all day. (And my husband, to be fair, he does as much work around the house as I do).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:SAHM with a 4 and 20 month old. Free time from 7:30pm to 9pm and while they nap, so maybe an hour a day while they're both asleep. I use that free time to fold laundry or clean up. My life is pretty sad right now haha.

That’s not free time. You’re describing time you’re not actively watching kids, but you’re still doing housework.

[Anonymous]

Not much. A couple hours on the weekends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have four ages 7 and under including an infant. This summer I had some free time because we had a nanny about 5 hours a day M-F and when the 2 youngest were napping I got to work on some DYI projects. Now with no nanny I have very little free time because after they are in bed at 7:30 or so I do various chores. Sometimes I will watch Netflix for an hour before going to bed but that's about it. But with four little ones I can't expect a lot of free time.

Hi! I have 4 kids, 8 and under. We JUST hired a nanny! Even with her, I don’t really have free time. Maybe between 8-10:30 when the kids are asleep, but I’m cleaning up from 8-9 typically. I keep buying bath products and books but I just look at them
longingly! One day, I’m sure I’ll have time. For now, it’s alright. I could use a little less noise though!

[Anonymous]

Now? K and 2nd grader in virtual school and I’m a stay at home mom. This should have been the year I had more free time but now I’m a full time teacher and cook and cleaner. My husbands works from home 3-4 days per week so I try to take the kids school lunch break to go ride my bike or hike for an hour on those days 12-1. Otherwise, up at 6:45 with them and on and off school until 3. Bed time 7:30. I try to get their School schedules/materials and meal plan in order before bed time so that I can have that 7:45-10 period to zone out. Pre-corona they’d go stay a night with the grandparents every 3-4 weeks.

[Anonymous]

Do you mean actual free time, when chores are done to a passable level and I can read or go out without kids? So very little, I don't even know. Rihjt now I am supposed to be cleaning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you mean actual free time, when chores are done to a passable level and I can read or go out without kids? So very little, I don't even know. Rihjt now I am supposed to be cleaning.

This. Show me a mother in America with legitimate free time. There's always something we should be doing! I'm writing this in bed with a pile of laundry staring at me.