"Safe" class at preschool

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I bet other people jumped on this and there's no more room in the class

OP here - I'm totally sure that this is the case. I just don't feel like the school should be facilitating it.

I do intend to ignore the letter and invitation, as I don't think our family is a fit and don't see how this works without a lot of drama.

Sounds like you want your kid to benefit from being in the safer group without your family living like the safer group. Unfortunately it doesn't work like that though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The fact that you may still see friends and family make you not a good fit for this class because you are taking riskier behaviors.

Riskier than sending a child to preschool?

[Anonymous]

It is completely fair. Many of us are staying home/not socializing and if you cannot do it, I'd be uncomfortable with my child in a classroom with yours. Good for them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it's nice. After reading here, some people dgaf about covid-19 and take no precautions. Take their kids to the park, the zoo, have playdates with neighbors, have get togethers with friends, go to restaurants. I don't want my kid near those people. If definitely jump at the opportunity to be in a class with people who are serious about distancing.

This is a classic example of mixing issues. You can be very careful at a park. You can be pretty careful with outdoor dining and the zoo. Get together have a huge range of safety depending on how it is done. I am all for precautions but if your sending your kid to any kind of group setting then you have to accept some risk. Having families agree to cdc guidelines is as much as you can reasonably ask for (and you should recognize that people may not follow them)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The fact that you may still see friends and family make you not a good fit for this class because you are taking riskier behaviors.

Riskier than sending a child to preschool?

That’s the thing, preschool is as dangerous or safe as the people your child is with all day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it's nice. After reading here, some people dgaf about covid-19 and take no precautions. Take their kids to the park, the zoo, have playdates with neighbors, have get togethers with friends, go to restaurants. I don't want my kid near those people. If definitely jump at the opportunity to be in a class with people who are serious about distancing.

This is a classic example of mixing issues. You can be very careful at a park. You can be pretty careful with outdoor dining and the zoo. Get together have a huge range of safety depending on how it is done. I am all for precautions but if your sending your kid to any kind of group setting then you have to accept some risk. Having families agree to cdc guidelines is as much as you can reasonably ask for (and you should recognize that people may not follow them)

"pretty careful"? Haha, you remind me of this mcsweeney's article. https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/another-dull-quarantine-weekend-at-home-target-chipotle-home-depot-and-our-nieces-graduation-party

[Anonymous]

I hear what you’re saying, oP. But what if you think of it as the “Strict” class versus the “lenient” class rather than “safe” versus “not safe.” Some families don’t get to choose whether to be strict or not (if parents are essential workers). If that’s an issue at your school, then full stop, this segregation isn’t ok. But we don’t have any essential workers at my daughter’s Preschool. We do have families who are basically quarantined versus families who are having play dates and eating inside restaurants. Those are two extremes. That seems a bit unfair to me that some of the families get to galavant and have fun while exposing the “strict” families. I think in those circumstances it’s completely fine for the groups to subdivide.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn’t do it, they sound nutty. This will be the first family to say that their (out of state wedding/graduation/family reunion/whatever) didn’t count because reasons.

EXACTLY!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is completely fair. Many of us are staying home/not socializing and if you cannot do it, I'd be uncomfortable with my child in a classroom with yours. Good for them.

If your kid is at preschool, then you have to get off your high horse. It is a fine, safe choice, but you can’t be this holier than thou while you kid is galavanting with other kids/staff regularly.

[Anonymous]

A lot of parents with young children are CRAZY.

My kids are teens/tweens but I remember well all the intensity, righteousness and anxieties of preschool.

This family is technically correct, and socially gauche. Preschool directors sometimes go along with intense parents to keep the peace.

I would send a conciliatory email that says that while this is a good idea in the abstract, it is very difficult to predict and trust in communal behavior over the entire year, as each family may have to deal with unforeseen situations (ie impulsive errors), and so therefore the safe class might not ultimately protect its members in the intended fashion.

[Anonymous]

+1 for nutty.

If you're a medical professional that deals with COVID-19 patients, is your child automatically excluded from this class because of the increased risk?

I'd send the director an email arguing that this "special class" seems discriminatory depending on the language of the offer. Why do families that have the ability to have both parents (also assuming a 2 parent household and not a single parent/divorced split time household) telework have the option but others are stuck in the "unsafe" class?

[Anonymous]

Reading your post again, a PARENT sent the email, not the school.

I'd forward it to the director and ask for confirmation, betting that the director gets mad at the nutty parent and likely disavows this "safe class."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I got an email today from a parent whose child is entering the same year as mine at our preschool. They were reaching out as they are trying to find other families entering this grade (preschool year) who are being "very conservative with regards to COVID safety" and are interested in making a "social pact" to continue those practices through the year and be "transparent with each other about changes". They say that they have gotten agreement from the preschool's director to put this group of kids in a class together if the parents request it.

I really feel like this isn't right on the part of the preschool. The school has protocols (which seem great, including full time masking and no mixing of classrooms); presumably everyone enrolling for this fall is aware of inherent risks of preschool and agreeing to those protocols as part of sending our kids back, but to facilitate the formation of a class that is somehow claiming to be "safer" than the others at the same grade level doesn't seem right. The organizing family described high level safety measures that they are engaging in and presumably expect other to as part of their pact (working from home, limiting exposure, wearing masks, not going to gyms/restaurants, etc.). Nothing crazy, and our family are doing all of those and being careful on our side, but I don't think I need to be justifying our family's activities with 7 other families if we decide to visit with grandparents or outside friends, or discuss why/how we have two kids in different preschool/daycare rooms, etc. In the end, I'm likely to ignore the email and therefore I suppose my kid will end up in the "unsafe" class where we have not signed onto the "pact".

I also think this is building in a structural bias - e.g. towards families where both parents can work from home, towards families of only children where another sibiling is not in the mix, towards families who are housed as nuclear units without other relatives under the same roof, etc. Given that there are only 2-3 classes for this particular age group, I see no way that this doesn't have impacts on the other classes as a result of self-selection in/out of the "safe" class. And which teachers are signing up teach the "safe" vs. "unsafe" class?

Does this seem crazy to anyone else? I don't really want to stir up trouble and I'm terrified of our director, so chances are I just go with this. But this feels like the school is facilitating some social engineering based on circumstances. It's one thing to set up a "pod" with agreed upon rules when your school is distance learning (as I've seen with many elementary schoolers). But this is like buliding a "pod" within a preschool, which feels explicitly exclusive and outside of bounds for things the school should be facilitating.

I totally agree with you OP. I personally would not raise a stink about this but I also would not sign up for it. I hope that people will be careful and not do things that research shows are high risk, but some people are more concerned than me about certain things research shows are low risk. For example, I don't obsessively disinfect everything (and research shows it's unnecessary - https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2020/07/scourge-hygiene-theater/614599/ ). I take my child to parks that are not crowded and let her play in an empty playground because I think giving her a chance to develop her gross motor skills is really important. We do outdoor physically distanced gatherings with friends because our mental health is also important. Having to negotiate all of this with a group in order to be in a supposedly "safe" class (that is not really guaranteed to be safe)? No thanks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is completely fair. Many of us are staying home/not socializing and if you cannot do it, I'd be uncomfortable with my child in a classroom with yours. Good for them.

If your kid is at preschool, then you have to get off your high horse. It is a fine, safe choice, but you can’t be this holier than thou while you kid is galavanting with other kids/staff regularly.

Amen. I will not interfere with or make a stink about the choices people make to try to stay safe (better that than the opposite). But if your child is in a preschool or child care program, you're not an isolated family and look pretty silly policing low-risk behaviors.