How to help friend who will have infant and kindergartener this fall?

[Anonymous]

You can still drop off food, just leave it at the door or have a Caviar/Uber Eats deliver it. I think there is a lot she can do to help her kindergartener but it may take a while to get in a rhythm with the new baby. The best thing you can do is just be there for her and check-in by phone. It can be isolating at home with kids all day while her husband works crazy hours.

Other ideas - If she's open to babysitting, you can offer but that's tricky with social distancing so don't press it. A number of moms in my area are starting pods and hiring a tutor to work with the kids for a certain # of hours a week. You could suggest she look into that. Also, check your local neighborhood Facebook group and send her some suggestions for other parents looking for the same.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My twins were slated to start K in the fall and we are skipping it. In the spring I taught them to read with the Learning Dynamics 4-weeks-to-read Boxed curriculum. We are learning to count to 100 and do basic math by doing board games and doing projects like I made them count a big bowl of fruit loops by color before eating cereal for lunch one day. They get to watch 30 minutes of educational tv every day (like documentaries, not like Dora is “teaching them spanish”). And we read a LOT. I bring a non-fiction and a fiction chapter boom with us to the park every day and read aloud while they eat. They are at or ahead of end-of-K milestones in most areas and we only do formal “school” for like 30 minutes a day per kid, and not at all on weekends. I don’t know what your relationship with her is but it is very easy to do homeschool for this age, and much more flexible than the nightmare that is DL per all of my friends who did it last year.

It's also much easier to find a tutor for this age. But regardless most UMC kids will be fine academically. Socially, they should be fine too, especially if they did some sort of group preschool or daycare before things shut down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If her husband is a NIH employee, they really should not worry much about "educating" their K kid or their kid falling behind. The truth is that K is pretty much useless educationally for kids from educated families. For them, it is mostly social/emotional (which NONE of the kids are getting right now so everyone is in the same boat). Plus whenever they return to fulltime school, the lower elementary classes are going to be mostly review anyway. Bottom line is, with a kid whose parents are college educated and work at NIH, assuming the kid is neurotypical, you can do very little for K and the kid will still be fine when they start again.

This.

They can probably also afford a PT tutor if they really want him to learn to read this year.

He may already know the basics of reading if he went to preschool, plus all the first grade classes (or the K classes in second semester, if we go back then) will be doing lots of review and catch up. Truth is that most UMC kids without any learning disabilities or challenges will be fine not doing K.

[Anonymous]

I am also due with my 2nd and have a rising K. DH and I are now full time telework. I am looking for a morning babysitter who can do activities with K.

[Anonymous]

So?

I had an infant and K-er and it all went very smoothly.

People are so weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She is also a Type I diabetic herself, so high risk for COVID. I talked to her last week and she said she is "terrified" at the prospect of dealing with an infant (she's due in 4 weeks) and a kindergartener who will be in MCPS and is an anxious kid to begin with.

How can I help her? Normally I'd bring over food to them, but she is understandably nervous about people coming over, given COVID.

Hoping the expectant and post-partum moms here can give me tips.

Terrified of taking care of the two children she chose to have?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She is also a Type I diabetic herself, so high risk for COVID. I talked to her last week and she said she is "terrified" at the prospect of dealing with an infant (she's due in 4 weeks) and a kindergartener who will be in MCPS and is an anxious kid to begin with.

How can I help her? Normally I'd bring over food to them, but she is understandably nervous about people coming over, given COVID.

Hoping the expectant and post-partum moms here can give me tips.

Did she purposefully wait to have her second child until her first would be in school? Most people I know had an infant with a child who wasn't in full-time school. How old are your kids, OP? I don't know what MCPS is going to do for K DL, but you could offer to print out worksheets and keep her kid full of supplies - maybe if she email worksheets you put them in a binder or something for him to more easily manage? My kids were in K last year and their private did mostly online DL with some worksheets at night, and with my husband and I both working, finding and printing the worksheets for "homework" was something we only did sporadically. If the teachers would have just given us a week or more worth of them we could have done it on the weekend, but when they posted something at 3 pm that the kids were supposed to do that night, we didn't always get to it. Our nanny was home (with pay) because she's pregnant, but the one thing I would have loved for her to do was handle the logistics of their schooling - is that something you can do for your friend? Not in person, obviously, since it sounds like she doesn't want anyone in the house, but could you prepare and drop off his school work every week? And if MCPS sucks, would you be able to find some school work for him to do? In K it's pretty simple stuff. You could even offer to "grade" it and give feedback. I think most adults are competent enough to do that for a K kid.

[Anonymous]

She chose to have 2 kids, you don't need to do anything. I am sure they can hire someone if needed. Just do what you would normally do for helping a friend with a new baby - uber eats card, dinner drop off, present, etc. It would be weird for you to take this one.

[Anonymous]

I don't really understand the question. 1 parent can handle two kids while the other parent works. People have been doing this since the dawn of time, and most people have their kids closer together than this.

It will be fine. She can work with the K kid for 15-20 minutes here and there while the baby naps, nurses, sits in the bouncy chair. I don't see the issue.

[Anonymous]

Ugh, OP, can I just say thank you for asking this question, about what you can do for others? It's sorely lacking here among all the "I'm hiring a tutor so Larla won't be 'left behind.'"

[Anonymous]

She's a SAHM, I assume? Do what you would do for any other SAHM friend who has a kid. Send a meal or maybe something nice for her like a good robe if you know her style.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So?

I had an infant and K-er and it all went very smoothly.

People are so weird.

Wow do want a medal?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She is also a Type I diabetic herself, so high risk for COVID. I talked to her last week and she said she is "terrified" at the prospect of dealing with an infant (she's due in 4 weeks) and a kindergartener who will be in MCPS and is an anxious kid to begin with.

How can I help her? Normally I'd bring over food to them, but she is understandably nervous about people coming over, given COVID.

Hoping the expectant and post-partum moms here can give me tips.

Terrified of taking care of the two children she chose to have?

I have an infant, a rising kindergartener and will be teleworking and I can't say I'm thrilled about the situation. Have some compassion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She is also a Type I diabetic herself, so high risk for COVID. I talked to her last week and she said she is "terrified" at the prospect of dealing with an infant (she's due in 4 weeks) and a kindergartener who will be in MCPS and is an anxious kid to begin with.

How can I help her? Normally I'd bring over food to them, but she is understandably nervous about people coming over, given COVID.

Hoping the expectant and post-partum moms here can give me tips.

Terrified of taking care of the two children she chose to have?

I have an infant, a rising kindergartener and will be teleworking and I can't say I'm thrilled about the situation. Have some compassion.

Agreed. I have a newborn and a 4yo, and DH and I are both teleworking. It took a long time to find any semblance of a rhythm for us, and the newborn likes to keep us on our toes. Compassion is certainly lacking here. Obviously, no one with an infant or due in the next few months planned to have a baby in a pandemic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So?

I had an infant and K-er and it all went very smoothly.

People are so weird.

No. They are lazy.