Settle a debate on modesty?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is up to both parties and their comfort level. As soon as one person feels uncomfortable, it should stop.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is up to both parties and their comfort level. As soon as one person feels uncomfortable, it should stop.

This. And it may waver back and forth. Both of my DDs were super modest at the beginning of puberty, but cared less after their bodies stopped changing. Now if I visit my adult DD, she changes in front of me without warning!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Up to comfort level. I mean what is your kid going to do in a locker room? It’s pretty normal to see someone of the same sex getting dressed/undressed.

Among peers is different, in my opinion. Any significant age gap = power difference = modesty difference. As a teenage swimmer, did I shower with my peers/dress with my peers in the locker room? Yes. Was the 30something coach a part of that dynamic, even though she often lifted weights, etc., with us? Hell no.

Sounds like you were sexually abused as a child and maybe that is affecting your views on this?

Sorry to disappoint. I know it is very hard for you to comprehend that other people have different views and opinions from you. I can see that is a very difficult reality for you. I can tell that People Being Different From You is a true challenge in your life, as you are so immature that you would claim a complete stranger was abused because they see the world differntly from you.

Grow up. Calm down. Good luck to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Up to comfort level. I mean what is your kid going to do in a locker room? It’s pretty normal to see someone of the same sex getting dressed/undressed.

Among peers is different, in my opinion. Any significant age gap = power difference = modesty difference. As a teenage swimmer, did I shower with my peers/dress with my peers in the locker room? Yes. Was the 30something coach a part of that dynamic, even though she often lifted weights, etc., with us? Hell no.

Sounds like you were sexually abused as a child and maybe that is affecting your views on this?

DP. It’s a sad excuse for a human being that uses this as a put down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If it hasn't come up by the first, and I mean first, sign of puberty, stop.

That's you. Not everyone.

The OP of this thread literally asked for opinions on this.

That's my opinion. Never said you had to agree with it. Why you feel personally victimized that someone sees the world differently than you do is beyond me.

Post your own thoughts. You don't need to "convert" me to your thinking.

Because, you silly child, you didn't post it as an opinion but as a commandment. We can see who clearly feels "victimized" here by your over-the-top response. Hint: the real victims are your poor kids, growing up with a dogmatic and prurient-minded parent like you.

The OP literally asked for my opinion.

I gave it.

Move on.

[Anonymous]

There is no age, it depends on each individual’s level of comfort with their body. Ideally, no one should ever feel discomfort, but Americans sexualize things do much, and yet are so prudish, who knows?!?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Up to comfort level. I mean what is your kid going to do in a locker room? It’s pretty normal to see someone of the same sex getting dressed/undressed.

Among peers is different, in my opinion. Any significant age gap = power difference = modesty difference. As a teenage swimmer, did I shower with my peers/dress with my peers in the locker room? Yes. Was the 30something coach a part of that dynamic, even though she often lifted weights, etc., with us? Hell no.

Sounds like you were sexually abused as a child and maybe that is affecting your views on this?

DP. It’s a sad excuse for a human being that uses this as a put down.

It’s a sad excuse for a human being that reads a put down into a question. The PP is using very strong language to suggest that a parent changing in front of their child is somehow an abuse of power. It’s understandable if she has a history of abuse and I think people would be nicer to her in responding.

[Anonymous]

I’ve never been nude around my kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve never been nude around my kid.

Never? Why? Where are your parents ever nude around you

[Anonymous]

I change in front of my son. He changes in front of me (he’ll be 11 soon). His dad lives in another state, I have no idea what the rules are there. It doesn’t bother us, if it starts to bother my son we’ll adjust. I have a body though, and it’s not perfect. I don’t want my son growing up believing women look like the airbrushed models in magazines. We don’t.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Up to comfort level. I mean what is your kid going to do in a locker room? It’s pretty normal to see someone of the same sex getting dressed/undressed.

Among peers is different, in my opinion. Any significant age gap = power difference = modesty difference. As a teenage swimmer, did I shower with my peers/dress with my peers in the locker room? Yes. Was the 30something coach a part of that dynamic, even though she often lifted weights, etc., with us? Hell no.

Sounds like you were sexually abused as a child and maybe that is affecting your views on this?

DP. It’s a sad excuse for a human being that uses this as a put down.

It’s a sad excuse for a human being that reads a put down into a question. The PP is using very strong language to suggest that a parent changing in front of their child is somehow an abuse of power. It’s understandable if she has a history of abuse and I think people would be nicer to her in responding.

Multiple people have indicated you are out of line. Accept your misstep and move on. Doubling down doesn’t make you look any better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If it hasn't come up by the first, and I mean first, sign of puberty, stop.

That's you. Not everyone.

Agree. Our family is a non modest family. It’s not unusual for me to be walking around half dressed doing various things. Tween DD is currently naked with a detangling hair mask and shower cap on. She’s sitting on a towel watching The Grinch

We all have bodies. No biggie

This is how we are. There was a noticeable difference in body confidence in college between girls that grew up in families like this vs. those who grew up in modest homes.

WTF?

No, it’s not normal to watch movies naked in front of your parents! This is way beyond “modesty” this is just flat out weird. So, does mom sit around naked watching HGTV while the teen son does homework in the living room?

[Anonymous]

I grew up in a hippie town and my mom would die of laughter if I suggested it was inappropriate for her to be naked in front of me. If she’s getting ready she’s running around nude with a towel on her head.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If it hasn't come up by the first, and I mean first, sign of puberty, stop.

That's you. Not everyone.

Agree. Our family is a non modest family. It’s not unusual for me to be walking around half dressed doing various things. Tween DD is currently naked with a detangling hair mask and shower cap on. She’s sitting on a towel watching The Grinch

We all have bodies. No biggie

This is how we are. There was a noticeable difference in body confidence in college between girls that grew up in families like this vs. those who grew up in modest homes.

WTF?

No, it’s not normal to watch movies naked in front of your parents! This is way beyond “modesty” this is just flat out weird. So, does mom sit around naked watching HGTV while the teen son does homework in the living room?

I’m the one with the naked Grinch watching tween. She’s dressed now. We’ve always been naked people so it doesn’t seem weird at all to us

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve never been nude around my kid.

Never? Why? Where are your parents ever nude around you

No. They weren’t. Actually the only time I can think of my mom seeing me naked was when I got a breast reduction. She never thought my breasts were all that big because I wore minimize bras. She saw the doctor mark me up prior to surgery (she was there so I just let her stay) and she said she understood why I needed the surgery.