We should all show respect for our elders. But you do need to also deserve it. You should show equal respect to your wife as you expect for yourself, from her. If you are worthy of respect and deference, your children will want to pay it to you. If you raised them right. |
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Your question is very unclear.
Are you saying you should always get your way because you are the oldest person in the family? No. Everyone deserves respect and a voice. I would say that if you are physically frail, the younger people should help with carrying heavy things, making trips downstairs. But that is about all I can come up with. A common saying in my house is, "We are a family and everyone has to contribute." You may give money, because that is what you have. The teens may do chores, because that is easier for them than you. But everyone in a family has to contribute...because that is how families work. |
| Make them genuflect and kiss your ring! That is a true sign of respect. |
| There are a lot of diseases that disproportionately impact the elderly and the young so you are certainly more vulnerable to them. But depending on the germ so are your younger family members. |
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OP is being coy.
Vulnerable to what? What kind of deference? How old are you? BTW, you chose to marry the younger wife and have the kids. |
| You sound demanding. Who said you could be head of family just because of your age? Go with the flow. Be nice to be around and they will respect you. You sound like a difficult person. Lighten up and your family will like you more. Crabby old man?? |
| I feel sorry for your wife and children having to put up with your attitude. Are a king? |
| Are you a king? |
| Entitlement among old people is endemic. One of the many reasons I hate most of them. |
| Your poor wife and children, I feel bad for them. I am sure they have discussions amongst themselves about difficulty living with you. You sound too set in old man ways to be enjoyed by your family. You should look into Assisted Living for yourself and then your family could relax. |
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My father, 80, is vulnerable. He almost died last year because his prescription opiod addiction resulted in a near fatal bout of constipation (No sh*t)!.
While stoned, he has blown most of his 401k (he does have a pension and SS though). He sits at home, watch Fox News and complaining about how Obama and Hillary are ruining the country. I admit I do not respect him. His situation is largely the result of his own decisions. Oh, he has also tried to get me into legal trouble through my job -- both encoring unauthorized disclosure of information (I did report the issues) and conflict of interest. He may complain about me to people, I don't know. I don't care. I visit him a few times per year. But he has not earned my respect. |
| OP, did you mean to use the word "venerable" instead? Venerable means to be accorded a great deal of respect, especially because of age, wisdom or character. |
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probably depends on circumstance.
Vulnerable to pneumonia? Financially vulnerable? Vulnerable to mental health issues? Answers will vary. |
| Nope. Get over yourself |
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Head of the family, deference, in what age do you think you live in. Those ideas and attitudes died a long time ago.
Nowadays you get respect if you give respect. You are making life harder for yourself and everyone around you. |