Losing Weight

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I guess op fell off the fitness wagon...or maybe dw has him locked up somewhere.

Still here... uninjured and free, and reading the comments which I appreciate very much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guess op fell off the fitness wagon...or maybe dw has him locked up somewhere.

Still here... uninjured and free, and reading the comments which I appreciate very much.

So what is the problem then? Is she mad because you spend all your free time at the gym, have very restricted dietary guidelines (sorry, those are no fun), what is her beef?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guess op fell off the fitness wagon...or maybe dw has him locked up somewhere.

Still here... uninjured and free, and reading the comments which I appreciate very much.

So what is the problem then? Is she mad because you spend all your free time at the gym, have very restricted dietary guidelines (sorry, those are no fun), what is her beef?

I think it's all of that - she's trying/wanting(?) to lose weight herself and I'm spending a bit more time working out and I cook my own meal sometimes and she bought my favorite treat the other day and I haven't touched it yet etc etc. I'm not sure really and I just hope she'll be supportive soon.

[Anonymous]

She may be thinking you will do what Chris Watts did.

He started working out, running, going to the gym, etc.
He lost a lot of weight & was very toned.

Which made him in the “hot” category where he attracted women.
He then cheated on his wife + I am sure you know the rest of the story.

[Anonymous]

Hmm. My SO spends a ton of time in the gym. It took me awhile to adjust when we first got together bc I have never dated a guy who spent THAT much time in the gym. He’s also very health conscious, we have a lot of similar food preferences but he is a much healthier eater.

I’m going to ask him if my teasing bothers him. I always thought of it as a running joke btwn us and nothing more. Never thought about the other side.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She may be thinking you will do what Chris Watts did.

He started working out, running, going to the gym, etc.
He lost a lot of weight & was very toned.

Which made him in the “hot” category where he attracted women.
He then cheated on his wife + I am sure you know the rest of the story.

This is quite a leap, PP. Get a grip.

[Anonymous]

Problem with many men is that they can't do anything in moderation. Could this be the problem? Every project, including your own diet and fitness, is all encompassing, non stop, all the time. I think women object to that, especially if they are taking a larger load of child caring and housekeeping duties. Hence the resentment. Now, if you don't have kids and are not absent for 3 hours extra each day... I don't know.

[Anonymous]

Her friends are probably telling her if you're losing weight and getting fit and looking good it's probably a mid-life crisis and you're either cheating on her or wanting to.

[Anonymous]

Probably. She asked why I'm trying to lose weight and I said I didn't want to be fat anymore but she's not happy with that answer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Problem with many men is that they can't do anything in moderation. Could this be the problem? Every project, including your own diet and fitness, is all encompassing, non stop, all the time. I think women object to that, especially if they are taking a larger load of child caring and housekeeping duties. Hence the resentment. Now, if you don't have kids and are not absent for 3 hours extra each day... I don't know.

All of this. And if you're topping it off by giving her dieting tips, she will hate you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Her friends are probably telling her if you're losing weight and getting fit and looking good it's probably a mid-life crisis and you're either cheating on her or wanting to.

This. She probably feels like you are doing it to try to impress another woman.

She is probably also upset that her efforts aren't going as nicely as yours, which isn't about you.

If you are spending more time looking in the mirror at your new physique - it's irritating to watch after a while, ego isn't an attractive thing.

I would tell her you'd like to do this together and find ways to cook new recipes together or exercise on your days off together because when one spouse is fat and the other isn't it just doesn't work.

[Anonymous]

00.34 here. Sorry just realised that your DW isn't trying to lose weight.

She is just a little insecure that you want to cheat or will get a lot of attention from women and that you will end up cheating.

[Anonymous]

I had an eating disorder when younger..I'm recovered...however... when DH went on a health kick and ditched his egg bacon extra cheese bagel for yogurt and started working out, I was supportive. When he started obsessing over his weight loss, exercise , calories it really bothered me because I had worked hard not to think about that stuff...and although I'm.pretty small, it triggered insecurities about my weight ..I knew I needed to be positive for DH but I also struggled with it...maybe ops wife is triggered in a similar way...

[Anonymous]

I think that it makes her self conscious of her own weight. Even if you aren't saying anything, your losing weight carries an implicit message that doing so is important and that she needs to do so as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She may be thinking you will do what Chris Watts did.

He started working out, running, going to the gym, etc.
He lost a lot of weight & was very toned.

Which made him in the “hot” category where he attracted women.
He then cheated on his wife + I am sure you know the rest of the story.

This is quite a leap, PP. Get a grip.

A leap??!
This happened to a regular, seemingly normal family.
None of us knew these people even existed prior to August 13th.

If it could happen to them, then it could happen to any of us.

Chris used to be heavier and just average in the looks department.
Then after he began working out, he lost pounds and inches.
Then he got toned & tanned and jumped into the “hot” category.

He got more attention from Females and began an affair that made him want to lead the single life that he couldn’t enjoy before because of how he looked.
He had never been hot & single, it was a completely new change for him.

While men do not typically kill their families over affairs, the hurt that these things bring not only destroy marriages, they destroy entire families!!

So if one partner gets hotter than the other, then it is a perfect opportunity for a million issues (not good!) to ensue.