School admissions: Can someone enlighten a naive expecting mom?

[Anonymous]

Thanks 18:01 and 23:02 for your rational summary!

[Anonymous]

enjoy your pregnancy and new baby! do not get caught up in the "hype!" just follow your gut and you'll be fine. don't let these pickle heads infiltrate your mind and thoughts about what schools you need to attend to be successful etc... it is crap! listen harvard and yale can't take all of the applicants from st. albans or sidwell, now can they? of course not! enjoy baby, be healthy, and take care of yourself. the best is yet to come my dear!

[Anonymous]

I'm not quite caught up in all the hype for pre-K because we picked where we live (in MD) around the public schools. Also with my husband's parents and my mom being public school teachers you could imagine the scandal of sending a child to private school

One thing I will say is for childcare for an infant, I can't speak for DC, but it seemed the options in Bethesda were far and few between. You needed to get on the waitlist right away and work the waitlist. I often wondered what moms with infants did in my town - were they all SAHM? Did everyone have a nanny? Were they SAHM with a nanny? There are a lot more preschool options in the area but again most of the moms I know are trying to get their child prepared for public school not trying to get into a feeder school for private school. So from the standpoint of getting your child ready for school the most important thing is to read to your child and talk to your child. Also believe it or not all that artwork, riding a bike, using scissors etc. provide important skills too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: So from the standpoint of getting your child ready for school the most important thing is to read to your child and talk to your child. Also believe it or not all that artwork, riding a bike, using scissors etc. provide important skills too.

AMEN to PP! As for "clueless" OP, here are some answers to your all important questions:

1. Do you really have to apply for your kid's pre-school or kindergarten?
Yes, and you should bring allergen-free homemade (by DH) cookies and recordings of your child reading (at age 2) in 4 languages.

2. How do they evaluate your child?
The Foreign Service exam and LSATs for toddlers.

3. Do you have to bring in an example of overachieving, like an eco-friendly Lego home your kid built?
Legos are OUT. Try stainless steel Frank Gehry Lincoln Logs.

4. Why isn't admission on a first-come, first-served?
Actually it is - at Denny's.

5. How important are social connections?
Invaluable. But it might take a while to figure out which connections work where.

6. If your kid doesn't get into the right pre-school/kindergarten, do they have a hard time getting into a decent private elementary school?
Yes. They are doomed to failure for all eternity.

7. What is all the fuss about?
Egos, anxiety, and lack of proximity to support networks that aren't paid by the hour.

[Anonymous]

Wow. You spent a long time writing that. I wanted for it to at least be a little bit witty, but sorry, it's just mean and sad and so bitter that it scares me.

The OP had a great question. Too bad you can't support her.

[Anonymous]

I am willing to give you some real advice.

I have two children in a top school in DC and the best advice I can give you is socialize your first born as much as posssible. Playdates, playgroups, meet friends at the park, whatever. Next is build their self-confidence. This is the best part - help create lots of confidnce by loving, hugging and kissing and playing with your child but not smothering. Give them some time to explore their world with your support. I am also a firm believer in letting your child learn early on that you are NOT the only person they can rely on in the world. If you are a SAHM, and dont have regular help, get a part time babysitter, even a neighborhood teenager you trust, for few hours a week. Bonding with someone besides you makes their world larger and safer. Third is probably a no-brainer - read, read, read. Interactive books are often great for active toddlers such as lift the flps and textures. Music is great too, almost as good as reading. Dance and sing with them to the music. Fourth, find a great preschool, and yes, its competitive to get in to the good ones. Start touring the fall they are 2 as most cutoffs are either 2.5 or 3. Some really good ones are attached to churches so think about joining now and becoming part of the community. Also, the much-maligned-on-this-site playgroups (In Town, Blue Igloo and Little Graces - all have web sites) are actually great and fun and good places to network and find out how things work and what good options there are for you ... which segues right into the Fifth, network through kids things like music class at Guy Mason Rec Center (Music Together) and your public library story hour. Honestly, most of this is super fun and you get to know your child and your community. The more you know the more prepared you will be when the time comes to start applying to programs. I lucked into a lot of this stuff. This forum did not exist when my first was born. I really wish someone had given me such straight forwrad advice. I was a fast learner though. Be confident that you will be too.

[Anonymous]

well said PP.

[Anonymous]

I have a suggestion that I'm not sure belongs in this particular thread (particularly given the snide, self-righteous tone of a few of the posters) but here goes. IF you happen to know that one particular school is of particular interest because it really seems to fit your values and your child's ability level or interests and IF this school offers summer camp ... consider signing your DC up for a few weeks the summer before the fall admissions cycle that you plan to apply. Why? Because it gives you a chance to really find out if this one school is all you think it is and to see how your child does there. Plus, when your child comes in for the playdate, s/he will feel much more comfortable having been there already and this confidence will show. The caveat is that most of the summer camps are led by teenage camp counselors rather than the school teachers themselves, so you won't get a chance to meet (schmooze?!) with the teachers who will influence the admit decisions, but some of the administrative people will be around. I'm not suggesting being pushy or obnoxious, but if the admissions director happens to stop to chat during pick-up or drop-off, I see no harm in mentioning your future goals or how much your child is enjoying the environment of the place! One reminder though--NEVER apply to only one school, no matter how much you love it compared to all others!

[Anonymous]

Based on my knowledge of summer programs, there is virtually no relationship between the summer program and the rgular school, much less faculty/administration of the schools in question.

[Anonymous]

Actually, this is great advice. It really did work for us - I swear. Administrators are around during the summer and reg emplyees/teachers often at least RUN the camp. They may see your child a little or hear about her/him. Plus, just the part about it "making your child more comfortable during the playdate" part is true and helpful. Most of the schools have summer camps.

[Anonymous]

This summer camp strategy was given to me with a wink and a nod by a current parent during a campus visit. We didn't do it because our child was not ready for a full day camp at the tender age of 3.5.

[Anonymous]

Hmmm. The summer camp strategy sounds like a mediocre way to do your homework on a school, but not such a bad method for helping get in ... just have to do your homework ahead of time. Any others have success doing this?

[Anonymous]

This approach backfired on us a little bit. Our son hated the camp (had college students not teachers as councilors) and therefore we knew there was no way he'd ever go to the school.

[Anonymous]

to PP, I guess you found out earlier rather than later!

[Anonymous]

which i meant to add is a good thing!!!