I wanted one child and I have one child. I feel very alone in this.

[Anonymous]

Perhaps they don't want to hurt you by seeming too happy or excited about a second child. Also, when I was pregnant with my second, even though I felt deeply happy, I wasn't externally giddy like I was with my first. Interestingly, I did express in terms of "need". "Need" is far stronger than "want", OP! I *needed* a second child to make my family complete.

Perhaps you're also primed to interpret these events in a negative way if you feel left out...

In terms of environmental impact, it's true that more humans in general are bad for the earth. However demographic pyramids need to be balanced unless you want nations to have difficulty supporting their aging population, as has been the case in Japan for years. The US has a plummeting birth rate - it was on the news recently.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m with you!

We are selfish and we know it, but we wanted to share our life with someone. We very much planned for DD, and we very much enjoy sharing our life with her. She’s our buddy and we love the freedom we have with one.

We are never outnumbered, one parent can always have a break (super nice on vacation and on weekends), speaking of travel: three to a row! It works for us and we are very pleased.

How are you selfish for having one kid?

I don’t know but as a parent of one it’s a message I get and I’m always just like, huh?? This idea def needs to be explained to me

I mean, I'm a one kid parent too and I get it also. I also agree it's ridiculous. Is it selfish to want to balance being a parent with doing other things?

Example: Tonight our 2 year old was a living demon. I swear to god she was possessed. However, we got her to bed at 7:30 and now DH and I are eating popcorn and watching Masterchef. We get to have a break after a long week of work and a child in demon phase. I guess some people think it's selfish to want this?

Also, PP is right that the best thing you can do for the Earth is to not contribute to overpopulation by having 1 kid rather than 2 or more.

[Anonymous]

We know a couple of families who were one and done by choice. The first felt like they had precisely the amount of time and energy needed to be successful parents of one. The other had the demon child from hell as their first and were afraid to have a second, plus they are incredibly involved with their community and didn’t feel like they had loads of free time. Both thrilled with their choice as the kids leave for college. Both a huge part of my three kids’ lives.

[Anonymous]

Having one kid has so many advantages for you, the kid and the planet. Own it. We have two but would have been perfectly happy with one, had the second not been possible. Both DH and I are only children and we liked the experience.

[Anonymous]

I loved being an only child. Nothing wrong with it at all!

[Anonymous]

We were one and done. We are very happy and never thought more kids would be better. Our DC is older and a happy friendly kid. One is perfect for us and I always feel sorry with so many kids.

[Anonymous]

We know several families that are one and done. In fact, there was a little clique of them in DD's preschool. They didn't invite her or another friend who has a younger sibling on afternoon outings -- the moms would be like "oh, we figured you couldn't come because your toddlers were napping!".

[Anonymous]

NP here who is one and done by choice. Now that DD is in school we have met many more families like us. Play dates are easier because it's just two kids of the same age, no bored siblings or youngers who need to nap.

Also, people can have secondary infertility but still be happy with their family of 3. You may see this more as your child ages and the new baby announcements stop.

[Anonymous]

Only child with an only child by choice - it’s really lovely.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We know several families that are one and done. In fact, there was a little clique of them in DD's preschool. They didn't invite her or another friend who has a younger sibling on afternoon outings -- the moms would be like "oh, we figured you couldn't come because your toddlers were napping!".

Sort of ridiculous they'd never ask you. I don't get offended when people decline a playdate because of a baby's nap schedule, and I'm happy to host a drop-off playdate or two to give you a break.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We know several families that are one and done. In fact, there was a little clique of them in DD's preschool. They didn't invite her or another friend who has a younger sibling on afternoon outings -- the moms would be like "oh, we figured you couldn't come because your toddlers were napping!".

Sort of ridiculous they'd never ask you. I don't get offended when people decline a playdate because of a baby's nap schedule, and I'm happy to host a drop-off playdate or two to give you a break.

Do you know many adult only children? Every single one I know is nuts; to them the world revolves around them. It’s truly a marvel. It’s clear that comes from cooky parents like these...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We know several families that are one and done. In fact, there was a little clique of them in DD's preschool. They didn't invite her or another friend who has a younger sibling on afternoon outings -- the moms would be like "oh, we figured you couldn't come because your toddlers were napping!".

Sort of ridiculous they'd never ask you. I don't get offended when people decline a playdate because of a baby's nap schedule, and I'm happy to host a drop-off playdate or two to give you a break.

Do you know many adult only children? Every single one I know is nuts; to them the world revolves around them. It’s truly a marvel. It’s clear that comes from cooky parents like these...

So you have at least one sibling? I guess we can conclude from your post that people who have siblings have poor critical thinking skills. I'm sure you're raising your kids to be kind, generous and thoughtful just like you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We know several families that are one and done. In fact, there was a little clique of them in DD's preschool. They didn't invite her or another friend who has a younger sibling on afternoon outings -- the moms would be like "oh, we figured you couldn't come because your toddlers were napping!".

Sort of ridiculous they'd never ask you. I don't get offended when people decline a playdate because of a baby's nap schedule, and I'm happy to host a drop-off playdate or two to give you a break.

Do you know many adult only children? Every single one I know is nuts; to them the world revolves around them. It’s truly a marvel. It’s clear that comes from cooky parents like these...

I have an only by choice but I'm more of a cupcake parent so my kid should turn out just fine.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like you want another child. Maybe you are projecting this "feeling alone" because of that. I don't think it has anything to do with your friends being excluding of you, or you being envious of them. Open your mind to what is really bothering you maybe?

[Anonymous]

To pp that says single kid are cooky... Kind of my experience too, even if they get a sibling when they are much older that remains. But, few of my friends that are onlys(we are close to 50, so I can speak not just for childhood) all have weird parents.They are all weird in different ways, and live pretty ok lives, but lots of weirdness is present that gets worse in their old age.