Opinions on bday gift (when siblings invited)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are the pool parties at someone’s home? A County pool with a hefty admission fee? A local pool with a nominal guest fee? My answer would differ depending on the situation.

House pool party: Either DH comes, too, or you just take 7yo alone.

Fairfax Water Mine: Expensive + guest limits—just you and 7yo

Local pool club: Either DH comes, too, or you just take 7yo.

(Ages 7, 5, 4 seems like a lot to supervise around water if solo-parenting.)

I can’t even understand this post.

If DH is available to watch the other two kids, why do they need to come to the party at all? Can your children not do anything apart, even if the others are welcome?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have twins, and when they are both invited to a party I spend twice the amount I would spend if only one was invited. (Approximately, since not all gifts are the same price). I'm not sure what I'd do for siblings that weren't friends with the birthday child (my children know all the kids in both classes at their school so they're friends with everyone even if they're not in their class). When I invite siblings to my kids' birthday party (or parties, if they do separate), sometimes I get cards from all the siblings, and sometimes not. I never stop to consider how much any gift costs because I don't care what people spend, so I have no idea if the names on the card reflects the cost of the gift or not. Honestly, anyone who dickers over the amount someone spends on a gift is not someone I want to be friends with, so I figure you're good to spend whatever you feel comfortable spending, and if the host is unhappy, then you've saved yourself from being friends with a yucky person.

This. When I include siblings in parties, I do it because I know it often makes logistics easier for families. I'm certainly not expecting anything for that in return.

Same here, however I do want to note that we were dropped out of a social group because our gift was not deemed worthy. I am pretty sure this was the cause because before the party we were part of the group, after the party, we weren't invited and our invitations were not accepted. We gave a $15 gift (which has been the norm in our preschool aged child's group), but received probably a $35-40 gift). Parties were the same weekend. Good riddance, I guess.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have twins, and when they are both invited to a party I spend twice the amount I would spend if only one was invited. (Approximately, since not all gifts are the same price). I'm not sure what I'd do for siblings that weren't friends with the birthday child (my children know all the kids in both classes at their school so they're friends with everyone even if they're not in their class). When I invite siblings to my kids' birthday party (or parties, if they do separate), sometimes I get cards from all the siblings, and sometimes not. I never stop to consider how much any gift costs because I don't care what people spend, so I have no idea if the names on the card reflects the cost of the gift or not. Honestly, anyone who dickers over the amount someone spends on a gift is not someone I want to be friends with, so I figure you're good to spend whatever you feel comfortable spending, and if the host is unhappy, then you've saved yourself from being friends with a yucky person.

This. When I include siblings in parties, I do it because I know it often makes logistics easier for families. I'm certainly not expecting anything for that in return.

Same here, however I do want to note that we were dropped out of a social group because our gift was not deemed worthy. I am pretty sure this was the cause because before the party we were part of the group, after the party, we weren't invited and our invitations were not accepted. We gave a $15 gift (which has been the norm in our preschool aged child's group), but received probably a $35-40 gift). Parties were the same weekend. Good riddance, I guess.

$10-15 is reasonable for one child but when you bring three if you can afford it do more. We had people bring 3-4 kids, many not invited and we spent twice as much as planned.

[Anonymous]

I suppose it depends on your social circle. Everyone I know has kids with WAY too much stuff already and are constantly trying to pare down. My thought would be they do not want or need extra gifts/money. One per family attending.

Most of the invitations we’ve received lately for large parties that siblings are welcome to attend have specified NO gifts- and unless I’m throwing a small, just a couple friends party, this is what we do as well.