6 year olds and parent kisses

[Anonymous]

When mine was little we did, and believe me, I never thought I'd be that mom. As he got older, we don't. He doesn't ask and I don't ask. I think since she's 6 and starting now, I'd redirect. I don't think it's the biggest deal, but it's probably a good time to teach her that she shouldn't kiss anyone like that so others don't put her in a weird situation.

[Anonymous]

wow, some uptight people... they are your kids. why would you turn a harmless kiss into something it isnt

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Cryptic subject? Sorry. I’m nervous about the trolls. My 6 year old daughter has recently started asking to kiss both her dad and me on the lips at bedtime. She requests a quick peck. This is not the cheek parent/child kisses that I was raised with, but it is truly a quick peck. My husband says absolutely not, but I’ve been caving because I’m no longer convinced it is an issue. I see photos of other people kissing that way— maybe I’m just uptight. I realize there is some risk of germ transmission. Have your kids asked for this?

My 6yo DD just started asking for this, and I feel the same as you, OP.

[Anonymous]

Doesn't bother me either way. Not a big deal.

[Anonymous]

My 6 yo doesn't like kisses at all, which seems sad. I kissed my mom on the lips and my dad on the cheek.

[Anonymous]

I always kissed my parents on the lips and kiss my kids the same way. Usually as they get older they’ll stop wanting to.

[Anonymous]

I still peck my mom on the lips. My 6 yo DS and 3 yo DD both kiss me on the lips, too. DH didn't grow up with this so he's less comfortable with it and very kindly says oh, thank you, but can you kiss me on the cheek instead? Kids don't seem to be offended.

[Anonymous]

We never kiss on the mouth. Only cheek, forehead, top of head etc. Never on the mouth. We've been teaching them this since they were little. I always say no, and have not been asked at age 6+.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think lips kissing between parent/child is fine, and say no is fine. But I think that if one party is uncomfortable, and it sounds like you are, then it's better to say no. Your kid will read your discomfort, and I wouldn't want even a hint of "we let people do things to us when we're comfortable", so I'd say "no thank you, please kiss me . . . " and describe what works.

agree. I still kiss my 9 year old son on the lips - just a peck - but if I were uncomfortable, I'd just say this that on the check was more comfortable for me and move on. I imagine he will be uncomfortable with lit kissing sooner or later - but maybe not. He still hold my hand sometimes too.

[Anonymous]

We kiss our kids on the lips - they are aware that lip kissing is for parents/siblings only, and only at home.

This must be a fairly common thing because in preschool, several children were told to stop kissing each other on the lips, and the kids all protested "but I kiss my mommy/daddy on the lips!" We were told by the preschool teachers to explain the "kiss family only, and only at home" rule to make it easier for them to enforce.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes I grew up giving my mom a quick peck on the mouth. I can't remember when we stopped though. But I will say, my kids are sick so much I often refrain from doing this with them!

I think it's ok if you are comfortable. If not, model the way you would want her to respond to someone asking her for affection she's not comfortable with.

This is great advice. My husband and I still kiss our 9yo DD on the lips. I come from a family of kissers and never even thought about it until I read posts like this on DCUM. It's not sexual, so I don't understand what the big deal is, but, OP, if you're not comfortable, it's an opportunity to model body autonomy.

[Anonymous]

I grew up in a family that didn't hug, kiss or said 'I love you' or anything close to it. None of my siblings are kissy, touchy feely people. I never seem them say or do anything I mentioned. And I am like that with my family-nonexpressive. I, on the other hand, is total opposite with my son. We hug, kiss, put our arms around each other, hold hands. He does the same with his dad except his dad doesn't do the kiss thing. My son likes them all and is comfortable with all the display of affection. He doesn't do it with anyone else, but a bit with grandma's. He does hug my mom and my mom reciprocate but is not verbal about it.

[Anonymous]

I have a 6 yo and it hurts my heart to think of not giving a quick peck on the lips! Now that I think about it, DH has not been doing as much lately so I’m thinking it may stop soon for me (have boys, maybe that’s bought me some extra time...)

They grow up so fast!

[Anonymous]

Way overreacting.

[Anonymous]

It's ok older than that too.
(Dad on left, daughter on right)